Gay son and younger siblings

[Findme23]

My son is 16 and has a boyfriend. They both kiss infront of my 7 and 8 year old sons. It's sometimes just a peck on the lips. Or slightly longer type kiss but nothing over the top . And they sit closely hold hands etc.

I have felt that my 7 and 8 year old are ok to see this. I have told them that all relationships are different, sometimes its 2 woman or 2 man or 1 of each. They don't make it an issue they do make silly giggle sounds and point etc . But that's no difference to if they was to see me kiss their dad . Just standard silly kid stuff.

I also want them to know different relationships are normal so they grow up with it and won't really question it or it be a thing when they are older.

Now ex feels the complete opposite that gay people should not kiss infront of children. It should be kept behinde closed doors. But he has nothing against gays .

Me and their dad were not living together. But we were still seeing each other. That is done with now . And he's not spending any sort of time in the house like he used to or the odd weekend like he used to. Kids have asked why. So far I have just said things like daddy is in a rush , to miss traffic. So you can see nanny faster and hings like that.

Just to add my older son is gay as well but he's very private so he would not display any noticeable effection anyway . He gets on ok with him

Is my thinking wrong ?

If the sites deleting my comments then obviously they don’t want me to talk about it. Which I never intended to do and was pressured to state my views after simply saying a pp wasn’t homophobic for talking about societal influences on children

I said deviates in a technical sense

And I wouldn’t say homosexuality is encouraged in society / while thankfully the level of hate and persecution has decreased it is still unfortunately not as accepted as heterosexuality.

you clearly are biased against homosexual relationships. Just be honest. A lot of people are. Which is why we have pride and tiger expressions of support - to try and drown out the hateful voices

If mumsnet deleted your post, it's because it broke the rules.

So if sexuality can be influenced, why is it okay in your eyes to influence children to become straight and not gay? And how do people who grew up in deeply homophobic environments become gay?

People aren't scared to come out? Who told you that? At what point did homophobia magically disappear from the world?

They won't be. Because that's not how it fucking works.

I really hope your child isn't gay or bisexual. You say people aren't scared to come out anymore? Well with a parent like you your DC might well be,

By that logic, in your imaginary word where children become gay by being around same-sex couples, you shouldn't want your children to be around opposite-sex couples in case it influences them to become straight when they otherwise would have been gay. Incidentally, how do bisexuals come about under this system? Equal exposure to both?

You still haven't explained how people growing up in places, cultures and families where homosexuality is forbidden turn out gay. Although given that you claim that no one is scared to come out anymore, maybe on your make-believe world these simply don't exist. Must be nice.

What must be nice ? Why would I care if other people are gay or not ? No I don’t think it would be caused just by being around gay couples. I acknowledge this would be present in a non inclusive society. But our society isn’t neutral and inclusive it’s encouraging. But I don’t in fact know what causes someone to be gay and I doubt you do either

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@Annaishere so you are protecting your children from becoming gay - because that isn’t what you want: you want them to be straight?

It must be nice living in a world where everyone is perfectly playing with gay and bisexual people and no one is ever scared to come out. But unfortunately that isn't the real world.

And I dont know whag you mean by encouraging but our society is not inclusive towards homosexuality, not universally. I know that from bitter experience. But what would I know, your the one with the "bisexual friend"...

But you still haven't explained how people growing up in homophobic environments can be gay. Or whether you wouldn't want your child to be influenced to be heterosexual when they otherwise wouldn't be.

I really don’t mean to offend anyone and feel I’ve been pressured into sharing my views.

Now ex feels the complete opposite that gay people should not kiss infront of children. It should be kept behinde closed doors. But he has nothing against gays .

Yes he does

"Enact bisexuality"? Your either bisexual or your not. And if someone who otherwise would have been straight does somehow magically become gay or bisexual by being "influenced" by being around gay couples then why is that a bad thing?

Also what the fuck is any of this based on? Because its not any kind of scientific evidence.

Pretty much everyone in the world will be around more straight than gay couples. But not everyone in the world is straight. And why aren't you saying you don't think children should be around straight couples I case it turns them straight? And how do people in homophobic environments become gay? None of what your saying makes any fucking sense.

And if you don't mean to offend anyone, don't be a fucking homophobe.

My own personal opinion. My son is only 16. He has told me he's gay and he has a boyfriend. For all I know in a years time he might meet a girl and decide he's heterosexual. Or he might decide he's bi. He doesn't actually have to choose.

That's just biphobic bullshit.
So you're saying that bisexuality is a choice? So if I, a bisexual woman decided to spend my life with a man, would you state I was now a straight and perhaps it was 'societal influences' that ever caused me to have any attraction to women?
I am bisexual because that's just who I am. I was raised in a very strict Catholic family and struggled massively with my sexuality. You think I chose that? The depression, the self harm, the self hate? Forcing myself to not look or think about her? Feeling ashamed?

You're sick.

Do you have any actual evidence for this?

@triforcetotem No but it doesn’t make me homophobic

So you just pulled it out of your arse then, got it.

Based on what? Some anecdotal comments from your 'friend'?

You're talking out of your arse, making offensive, demeaning and dangerous comments on something you admit to knowing nothing about.

They will get used to it, they are almost beyond the giggling age

I never even wanted to have this conversation. I just wanted to say a previous poster wasn’t being homophobic