Gay son and younger siblings

[Findme23]

My son is 16 and has a boyfriend. They both kiss infront of my 7 and 8 year old sons. It's sometimes just a peck on the lips. Or slightly longer type kiss but nothing over the top . And they sit closely hold hands etc.

I have felt that my 7 and 8 year old are ok to see this. I have told them that all relationships are different, sometimes its 2 woman or 2 man or 1 of each. They don't make it an issue they do make silly giggle sounds and point etc . But that's no difference to if they was to see me kiss their dad . Just standard silly kid stuff.

I also want them to know different relationships are normal so they grow up with it and won't really question it or it be a thing when they are older.

Now ex feels the complete opposite that gay people should not kiss infront of children. It should be kept behinde closed doors. But he has nothing against gays .

Me and their dad were not living together. But we were still seeing each other. That is done with now . And he's not spending any sort of time in the house like he used to or the odd weekend like he used to. Kids have asked why. So far I have just said things like daddy is in a rush , to miss traffic. So you can see nanny faster and hings like that.

Just to add my older son is gay as well but he's very private so he would not display any noticeable effection anyway . He gets on ok with him

Is my thinking wrong ?

Thank you. What you say makes sense.

And yeah the ex at the end of the day I can't control how he is. The kids are very young still and will have their own thoughts one day.

I think you are doing the right thing. You are showing your older boys they can be themselves and there is no shame and nothing to hide.

you are showing your younger boys that love is love - and whoever they happen to be attracted to that is okay. It’s just how things work out. No big deal.

to the idiot who said you are promoting homosexuality over heterosexuality- the whole world is full of images of heterosexual couples. These boys will be fully aware and will not become gay just because they see their brother being affectionate with his boyfriend.

Totally agree 👍 thank you for getting where I'm coming from

This isn’t homophobic it’s caution. No one knows what causes someone to be gay

do you suspect you have latent homosexual tendencies that you're frightened of acknowledging?

Ok,fair play for drawing a line when he was a dick about your older lad

Caution against what?

Do you think seeing same sex couples kissing makes people gay?

I of course know nothing about your level of education or life experience, but I really encourage you to do a bit of research. Talk to some gay people. Hear about their experiences. I have seen lots of gap people kiss - Janet made me gay. Gay people are bombarded with images of heterosexuality- it hasn’t changed their attraction.

Caution in itself is homophobic. The assumption that homosexuality is something to guard against.

Against influencing someone’s sexuality

So no kissing at all in public - homosexual or heterosexual. No holding hands, no attendance at weddings.

no demonstration that human beings have romantic relationships incase it influences children?

or is it just homosexual couples?

I’m not homophobic and I don’t mean “guard against”

So does that go for heterosexual couples as well. We would not want to influence someone being gay or heterosexual. So all any form of effection/relationship must stop

I honestly don’t see how you aren’t homophobic. Unless you can explain this better.

I said it in view of pp’s comment describing their home environment as one with only homosexual relationships as guidance/ moulding. I don’t think it was homophobic

Do you object to homes with only heterosexual relationships as guidance/moulding?

I think it's lovely how open minded you are with it all. Your son is lucky to have a mum like you. It's so important to teach your kids that same sex relationships are accepted and are okay. There is absolutely nothing wrong with him kissing his boyfriend and having affection.. the only thing I would say is if it was my little girl and her older brother doing it I wouldn't be happy. Purely for the reason of her age. Maybe 7 and 8 is a little young to be seeing that? I do not know maybe I am being silly. I guess I would just want them to maybe do it in private in their bedroom and then when my daughter was of age herself I would be totally fine with them kissing in front of her as she will understand it more. But overall I wouldn't worry too much mama

No. This environment expresses a biological blueprint.

And there it is.

Assuming that that were possible, which it's not, then would you also make sure your children were not around any heterosexual couples showing affection in case that turned them straight?

My home /family is a mix. My 13 year old changes her mind everyweek. 😂

What the hell does that even mean?

It means this lady is homophobic

We can’t be scared to even talk about this stuff or it’s “homophobic”. It’s literally what the OP’s post is about.

Saying that children shouldn't be exposed to same-sex relationships in case it makes them gay is homophobic, yes.