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My beloved husband just bought me beautiful earrings

368 replies

AvaCallanach · 18/07/2023 21:49

He really did buy me beautiful earrings for my birthday. This is not a complaint. It makes me smile. He tries so hard. He took the kids shopping, did me proud.

But bless him, he bought these beautiful earrings which he has bought me 4 times before. Twice in blue, twice in green. This is the third blue pair. They are obviously his style!

He adores me ( played me To The End by Blur after work, we are off on holiday without the kids next week). I love him. He's wonderful. But why can't he remember these earrings and yet keep choosing them, lol.

OP posts:
AvaCallanach · 22/07/2023 00:46

Windercar · 21/07/2023 23:46

Enjoy your mental gymnastics and farewell 👋🏻

Farewell. I hope one day you are lucky enough find out about what long term love actually is (clue- it's not gifts).

OP posts:
TooManyNameChanges12 · 22/07/2023 02:56

AvaCallanach · 19/07/2023 12:09

In a 34 year relationship the examples I could give of my husband being lovely would fill a thread. However...

Picture the scene, Autumn 1989, a Northern mill town. A first year student with a hippie Indian skirt on enters a halls of residence party with friends. A shy guy who she has met a couple of times before, friends of friends, detaches himself from the melee and comes over. He warns her not to drink the "punch" that someone has mixed up in a huge black plastic bin. He has heard a rumour that one of the flatmates pissed into it. Instead, he shows her where his stash of beer is hidden, inside the lining of an upturned chair, and tells her to stick with that because it's safer.

Several hours later it's sleeting and she hasn't brought her big coat. She wraps herself in her cardi and makes to leave. He says he will see her safe to halls and gives her his Withnail and I style second hand coat to wear. He insists he isn't cold, walking along in his t-shirt. She has drunk too much beer and really needs a wee. They duck into a park where she hides behind the bushes to go Al fresco and he says he hasn't ever met anyone who wouldn't care about weeing in a park before, and that she is as cool as fuck.

They stop off at an old bar where a guy is playing the piano, and find a booth, and talk and talk.

34 years later he tells me how much he loves me every single day. He tells me I built his world. He cries at soppy lovesongs. He brings me tea in bed every morning. If the world ended tomorrow I would know with absolute certainty that this man loves me and that we have been happy together. The scale of our shared history and everything we are to each other is not going to be knocked off course because he is forgetful over presents and spends way more than I would!

Op I love this story. Thanks for sharing!! :-)

Grantanow · 22/07/2023 11:37

The longer the marriage the more difficult it can be to find new gifts for one's partner.

Interested in this thread?

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Bugbabe1970 · 22/07/2023 12:54

Why don't you just tell him? There's a nice way to say it! Such a waste of money

Jzp · 24/07/2023 07:48

I’m more speechless at some of the replies on here than I am the fact that the OP husband has bought the same earrings four times. I could see my husband doing a similar thing. We’ve been together over 40 years and my birthday presents have exactly the same theme year after year. Always wine/gin (I gave up drinking a few years ago) always chocolate (I’m always on a diet). When I was nursing it was always foot cream which I didn’t use. The thing is he’s the most fantastic faithful and loving husband I could wish for.
This year I bought a dress when we were on holiday and said to him “look what you’ve bought me for my birthday”. He was well happy with that as it saved him the stress!
OPs husband sounds like mine, a very good husband and definitely not thoughtless in any way, just not the best at buying presents!

CrapBucket · 24/07/2023 07:54

Surely all you need to do is simply get your ears pierced 4 more times then you can wear ALL the earrings at once?! Problem solved, you’re welcome.

AvaCallanach · 28/07/2023 20:58

PostScript. Just had my wedding anniversary; an important milestone one. All has become clear. Yes he bought me the same earrings again for my recent birthday by accident, but he chose them because they match the lovely necklace he particularly wanted to give me for our anniversary.

He also asked me rather anxiously after the earrings debacle if he has bought me the necklace before, as he has the gift receipt.

No I haven't looked up the price of the necklace; yes you could get similar (inferior) things for 20 quid at the market. None of that is the point really. Main point is - none of this is a sign that he doesn't give a shiny shit about me.

My beloved husband just bought me beautiful earrings
OP posts:
MrsRonaldWeasley · 28/07/2023 21:26

@AvaCallanach I stand by my original comment… your husband sounds very lovely! Happy Anniversary to you both ❤️

LongTermLurker · 28/07/2023 21:38

So lovely!! Happy anniversary 🥰

LadyPoison · 28/07/2023 22:04

Your husband has lovely classic taste in jewellery and buying the same thing over and over is what my own DH is quite likely to do. He is now banned from buying me jewellery!

Clymene · 28/07/2023 23:24

Aww what a lovely ending to the thread. I just read your meeting post. I hope you tell your children - it's a lovely romantic story.

Happy anniversary! Flowers

Windercar · 29/07/2023 00:19

He also asked me rather anxiously after the earrings debacle if he has bought me the necklace before, as he has the gift receipt

if he is concerned about memory problems he should see a GP. This would worry me, it’s not normal

Problemcat · 29/07/2023 00:22

it’s the matching necklace to the earrings which doesn’t suggest a whole lot of thought!! Doesn’t mean he doesn’t love you though

Anna79ishere · 29/07/2023 06:49

This is now becoming ridiculous, even sharing the pic of the necklace. Do you really put so much importance to gifts and jewellery? Is it what really show if your marriage is going well and if your husband loves you or not? It seems to shallow really.

AvaCallanach · 29/07/2023 09:26

Anna79ishere · 29/07/2023 06:49

This is now becoming ridiculous, even sharing the pic of the necklace. Do you really put so much importance to gifts and jewellery? Is it what really show if your marriage is going well and if your husband loves you or not? It seems to shallow really.

Tell me the point of a thread has gone over you head without telling me the point of a thread has gone over your head!

The whole point of the thread was me saying no, I don't particularly care about gifts and jewellery, but simply wondered why he wouldn't recall which types he bought before. I answered this question myself quite quickly. It was other posters who hammered repeatedly and despite my saying that this wasn't my experience in my relationship that the only possible reason for a duplicated gift is that he doesn't give a shit/ gets his secretary to buy them for all his women/ doesn't. give. a. shit.

My postscript was just to wrap it up by saying ah! That's why those earrings! To go with this necklace. The pic is because Mumsnet don't believe anything without proof. If you recall, I didn't share pic of said earrings until I was asked to prove what I was saying.

This thread has been a very strange journey into the minds of many mumsnetters. So many mean, jealous, seething and/or bitter people out there, quite determined to bring someone down for sport.

Right, this is my final post. Have happy lives. My philosophy remains that, in long term relationships, generally, gifts are not that important. It's what happens between you every day that matters.

OP posts:
Problemcat · 29/07/2023 14:55

It was your ‘final post’ a good few pages ago I believe. Honestly you don’t sound in a good place and the relationship seems a bit insecure. Have you tried counselling?

BadNomad · 29/07/2023 15:41

Gaslight much, Problemcat?

Windercar · 29/07/2023 20:12

Eh?

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