Omg I had enough

[271726a]

May Need to scan my other threads for this to make sense.

So there is a social worker involved due to my sons violence/aggression.

It has been said there are no worries about my other children although I did allow social worker to talk to the younger kids . And the school. They have no concern.

Now I just had the social worker email me about an hour ago . Asking me about my younger kids Jabs . Questioning me why I have not had them done and telling me i have a week to sort it. Now by law I don't have to have them done and as a parent I don't have to . But yet there they trying to force it .

To be honest I don't feel overly strong either way. I can't even remember why I did not. I had Been in temporary accommodation and then covid etc so possibly slipped my mind. So it's not the end of the world for me to sort it. What I don't like is the demands of doing it by next week. And the over the top interference of my children. When its Been agreed thus is about my 16 year old.

When we had TAC meeting a few days ago my younger children were not even mentioned. It's like they never existed.

I honestly have enough to cope with

Anyway if there are any social workers here or who l lws the system can you please explain this to me?

Just to add this is not a jab debate and I will ignore any attempts to turn it into one.

Thank you . That's actually a great idea .

Thank you for the straight answer 😊

Exactly this.
Banging on about your rights will make you look much worse than you already do. If you want SWs to be helpful and supportive, rather than feel you’re being hounded and pestered, then comply with this basic sensible request. You’ve admitted you don’t have a problem with vaccinations, so this isn’t a case of a parent with specific ethical/medical objections. You sound like you’re just looking for a fight.

Plenty of people don't have photo ID. I don't have a passport because I travel and I don't have a driving licence because I dont drive due to disability.
OP, can you ask the social worker politely why they appear to have changed their focus to your younger children? While reassuring them that you are getting them registered with a GP and vaccinated.

That's really weird and overreaching of the social worker.

She can't make your kids have them, nevermind ordering it to be done in a week.

Sounds like she has a power complex.

I feel like the manger Is telling me 1 thing and the social worker bi's doing another thing.

She also tells half story's half information. She see my 16 year old separately and when me and hom come together it turns out wr have each been told different things or half story's

But also at 7 and 8 the last one was age 3yrs 9months so how many have they missed? It sounds like neglect, no local gp, chaotic life, violent 16yr old who sounds like he hits you / 12yr old. You clearly need their help op.

Lots of assumptions there .

I don’t need to read your other threads to know that if social workers are this closely involved in your parenting - it is likely for bloody good reason

Do you receive pip

if you do, and you don’t have any photo I’d, that means you’re missing out on quite a few benefits ie Access card that issue a photo Id

Yes op, assumptions based on what you have said. And what the social worker is seeing. Also just because you interpret the convo with the manager as supporting you I wouldn't be so sure. They were polite but carry on like you are and the younger ones might be added tbh!

No they can’t force it, but if the children become looked after then they will be done. Not sure at what point the parent has no say in it, but there is a certain point where that kicks in.

This is inaccurate, looked after children won’t have vaccinations done without parental consent. Parents still retain parental rights if their children are in care - only if parental rights are removed by court can the local authority make those decisions for children and the OP is a very long way from that.

@Ds16dv while social work involvement is focussed on your older son, they will look to build a general picture of all children in the home. Could you imagine the outcry if social work focussed on one child, didn’t assess the other children and something harmful happened to one of them?

While the manager has said there are no concerns about your younger children, you’ve also mentioned things that will mean they look more closely eg not having children vaccinated with no real reason why not, not being registered with a GP (reliance on things like walk in centres isn’t great because there’s no consistent oversight of the children’s health). It’s not unusual for neglectful and abusive parents to use a number of different health care providers because it’s much more difficult to build a coherent picture of injures, illnesses etc. Not letting the social worker see where the children are sleeping (it’s not unheard of for the home to look ok in public areas while children either don’t have somewhere to sleep or are sleeping in filthy conditions).

As workers we don’t know the parents who are a bit disorganised, those who are generally struggling with parenting and those who are actively harmful. We need to build a picture using what we know about what can point to difficulties in parenting. Each issue on their own may not give pause for thought but taken together the picture starts to look worrying.

Social work is intrusive, it needs to be. We question parenting decisions and background information to build a picture of the general care of all the children in the home. The more you’re able to work with social work the quicker we’re out of your life, the more you prevaricate the more we think there’s something we’re missing.

You can’t be forced to vaccinate your children, just say you’re choosing not to at this stage. But make it an intentional choice rather than something you’ve just not got found to because that makes us think what else have you just not got round to in your care for your kids, and then we need to look.

What because If we put it bluntly. I'm a victim of Domestic violence from my own son. Who social services push fir him to be at home when I wanted him removed due ti his violence and aggression.

Well done you 👏 👍

I can tell by the tone of the post you are aiming to be spiteful . I hope I have given you the response that gives you the kick yoi so wanted

No judgement, just letting you know the social worker's thinking - I've been a CP social worker for several years. Work with them and be open to suggestions - good luck!

Out of interest, @overdogged (as the OP has the answers she needs, multiple times), if a client like the OP said to you that they were struggling to get registered with a GP because they didn't have sufficient photo ID, what help and advice would you give them?

It comes up on here a lot, not least the expense of getting passports / provisional & full driving licences. The voter photo ID card is free, but it says on the Gov.uk page that it can only be used for voting purposes.

Are social workers allowed or expected to assist?

I never suggestedthere were people who dont have id, but they are unusual. Even many disabled people have photo Id through blue badge or local authority disability concessions. Like it or not Having photo id fundamentally makes modern life easier to interact with. The fact the OP has no photo I'd has apparently mentioned she is unable to register at her children at the GP. As she doesn't and therefore can't it makes logical sense to ask why

OP is raising many alarm bells on lots of accounts. At the moment unless the OP feels strongly against any of these things, getting photo id to register with the gp to get the kids vaccinated would be a good move. Even if she did feel strongly against these things getting id, registering at a gp and vaccinating the kids would be sensible if she was looking for a swift sign off from social services interest

I'm not meaning to sound unkind but I'm a primary school teacher. The parents we have concerns about sound like you - chaotic, hard to understand what the problem is, full of excuses or reasons why they can't do something and (sorry to say) they are the centre of everything with their children being afterthoughts. Sometimes I'm talking to a parent and all I hear is 'I...I...I' or 'This happened to me and this and this' with the children not coming into it.

You keep mentioning this manager not having concerns, maybe she didn't then but does now and maybe the worker is doing a better job?! Your children are the focus, it's great that your younger children are being looked out for.

Omg I give up ... my kids go to school there are no concerns

I would expect a parent to ensure they have the right documents and means to register for schooling/health services as a basic.

So birth certificates, speaking to the practice manager about how to get registered, obtaining the documents you need, there are some other versions of ID which you can apply for such as the voter ID cards which are not costly (if your GP practice accept this)

Are social workers allowed or expected to assist?

Absolutely, I’d either work with the GP to confirm an acceptable form of ID, or look to support the person in obtaining appropriate ID. I’ve not come across an absolute requirement for a passport or driving licence to register with a GP, I’ve usually been able to have that waived because I’ve been able to confirm the persons identity.

It’s not unusual for vulnerable people to struggle with life admin, a good social worker can support with that or signpost to people that can.

why is your oldest son violent?

It sounds like there are LOTS of things you need to get on top of. Do yourself a favour and don't wait for x, y or z date. Just DO it. You are responsible for your children and you need to keep them safe, and part of that is getting them the vaccines that are on offer to them.

Thank you for everyone replys . That made sense and were helpful and put in a none judgement way. I will take them on board.

I'm going to step away from the thread as its stressing me out to much and I already have to much to cope with I do not want this thread sending me over the edge. I have never done this before and normally see a thread through. Even when they are not pleasant. Which indicates I'm not in the right place right now for this thread.

Ad I said thank you for the helpful advice 💐

A quick Google has found a free UK citizen's photo ID that the OP could apply for...yes of course social workers can assist with this, although the greatest barrier is time. The school's FLO might be best placed to help.

SS or anyone else cannot force you OP, see all the vipers are out looking down on you. Many probably live in their perfect world where they have no clue on how some genuinely struggle.

I would only communicate with SS via email, do not let them bully you.

To be fair, there are lots of people who don't have photo ID. If you don't drive, you don't have a driving licence. If you don't holiday abroad (can't afford to etc) then you probably wouldn't have a passport.