Please help - husband has had a psychotic breakdown

[Terrifiedforthefuture]

I’ve namechanged for this as I don’t want it linked to my other posts.

My husband is in hospital after suffering from a psychotic breakdown. He has had problems with alcohol and cocaine on and off for as long as I remember. His behaviour this weekend has been aggressive, paranoid and delusional. He made a completely false and dangerous allegation about me and told his family and mine that it was true. I made him leave the house yesterday and he continued to berate me with aggressive messages so I blocked his number.

The police came to my house this afternoon to do a welfare check on me and the children. They said he had been found in an area about 3 miles from our home (of which he has no known connections) and concerned residents had reported it. Police say he was extremely paranoid and delusional and they were very concerned for his well-being. They brought him to a&e for a mental health assessment. They asked if I wanted to see him and I said I was unsure, they said as he had been aggressive towards me all weekend and was still extremely paranoid maybe it wasn’t a good idea for me to see him right now in case he lashes out at me.

I have contacted his siblings who are all down at the hospital with him now while I am home with our two very young children, one with SN.

I don’t know why I am posting or what I am hoping to get from it but I am terrified and really need a handhold.

*due

My dh had a breakdown and it was awful but we got through it. He never hurt me although he said he was worried he had/would.

They can recover but it’s up to him now if he can stop the drugs and alcohol.

All this chat about drug addicts not being given beds is rubbish. I was one myself. I was given a bed at first sign of psychosis. In for 28 days. Quit drugs and made a full recovery.

I’d just like to clarify that my kids are and always have been my priority. I have been a stay at home mum now for 4 years, I have given up my career for my children, one of which has SN and the other a chronic health condition. My youngest is always in and out of hospital, eldest struggling at school with SN and I do absolutely everything I can to support them with my own needs always coming last.

I am safeguarding my children accordingly hence the reason why I have told my PIL’s that I cannot have him back home and they agree with me. I will arrange contact in the future when he is in a more stable place however my children will always come first. I am currently accepting that I will now be a solo parent and that’s just how it is. My husband may be unwell but I deem his current illness a risk to my children and therefore he won’t be returning to my home. When he is better he will not dispute this either, he will also accept this.

@Terrifiedforthefuture how scary for you. Once he has been medically cleared he will have an assessment under the mental health act. This will involve 2 psychiatrists and an approved mental health practitioner (could be a social worker, nurse or ot). They will also want to consult with his nearest relative as part of this. The assessment will determine whether he is detainable and there are a few possible outcomes 1. Not detainable (could be discharged home with support from community mental health, substance misuse) 2. Informal admission (not formally detained but he has agreed to go in somewhere, 3. Detained under s2 (he would be detained for a period of assessment ) 4. Detained under s3 (he would be detained for treatment).

A referral may well be made to children's services especially given you've told police how he was at home. They may well phone and have a chat, or phone and arrange to visit to assess. Try not to worry, they will be concerned about the welfare of the children but also will want to see you are acting protectively- which you are by saying be can't come back to the house.

Sending positive thoughts your way

If the police are involved and it's a 136 that's been carried out from a home address that has children in it then social services will be notified

He was found 3 miles from home.

OP I’ve experienced similar but with my dad as a result of schizophrenia. He became delusional and focused in on my mum.

I hope your husband is offered a bed in a MH hospital, my dad was told to go home from A&E, relax and watch tv! That advice was given by an on duty psychiatrist. I refused to take him home and told the psychiatrist I would hold him responsible if any harm came to anyone. Miraculously a bed in a MH hospital was found within half an hour.

If he is admitted, he will be assessed, prescribed medication, as he is an addict I suspect there will be further treatment to address his issues, and kept in until he is deemed ‘well enough’ to be discharged.

If he isn’t offered a bed and tries to return home, I would call his parents or the police to have him removed. You have got to put your safety first. He isn’t well and won’t be thinking rationally.

Take care OP

Thank you to all who have offered information, practical advice and a much needed handhold. This has been an extremely stressful day but my children will keep a smile on my face. I will take each day as it comes

I hope YOU are ok.

I’m so sorry for everything you’re going through OP, I can’t imagine how stressed you must feel. Not the same I know, and I’m sorry if this has already been said, but I just wanted to say that my mum was recently sectioned (under a section 2, which I presume your husband would be) a second 2 lasts 28 days, then they can extend it to a section 3 if they feel it’s necessary at the end of that time, which is a further 6 months. The next of kin will need to agree to him being sectioned and can contest it if they don’t agree. I honestly thought that mum being sectioned was the worst possible outcome and fought so hard for it not to happen, but it’s actually been the best thing that could have happened. She is now receiving the best care and her needs are being met. They’ve sorted her medication and she is no longer sectioned under the mental health act, as she is staying willingly in hospital. They honestly don’t section people unless they think it’s for their own good and they can help them. I know it’s such a scary word with so much stigma attached to it, but we’ve found the mental healthcare professionals to all be exceptional and I can now see why it was 100% the right decision for mum.
I really hope things get better for you and your husband and brighter days are ahead. Stay strong, you’re doing amazingly. Sending you and your little ones love ❤️

Yes OP, don't forget to look after you too.

He has a really good chance at recovery as it’s been caught quick and 1st time. Plus side to the drugs is this probably caused an ‘explosion’ which couldn’t be ignored, as opposed a slow trickle to catastrophe.

I was told that after a first break, that you are at very high risk of another. And with every new break, more breaks even higher likelihood, and there gets a point; usually 2-3 breaks in where they just say that’s schizophrenia; your going to be stuck in and out of these breaks for the rest of your life. More drug use adds to the likelihood. He needs the shit scaring out of him to never do drugs again.

Drug induced first time psychosis actually has really good full recovery rates. He’s the only one who can do it though. It’s not all luck. Once your back from the depths of a break you move back to the edge between the break and reality. You then have a choice which way to go. Which sounds crazy to some if you think you don’t have any free will. But you do and a huge part of my recovery was becoming apathetic to my delusion and not chasing / indulging in it. He has to look after himself, sleep well, eat well, know his risk triggers, triple check even prescribed medications.

I recommend demanding a psychologist as well as a psychiatrist. The first is difficult to get, the latter should be standard.

Goodluck

@RugbyMom123

I agree, there is an element of free will and control in recovery. People aren’t doomed or completely helpless. There is a lot of hope in recovery but it does require some work on the individuals part.

@PomegranateRose

Totally disagree with you in regards to substance abuse being a mental health condition. No, that’s a choice. A poor one but a poor choice all the same. I save my sympathy for the individuals left to rot under the care in the community smoke and mirrors guise. I make no apologies for that.

I understand too. From experience. And I completely agree with you.
The OP should under no circumstances be guilt tripped into putting her husband ahead of her children's wellbeing and her own peace of mind. At this stage her presence in his life will make little appreciable difference to his prognosis but an immeasurably detrimental one to her own and her children's life.

@Notamum12345577

I would give you the same advice. I have females in my family who have ended up as inpatients due to being sexually abused. That was many years ago though now, they certainly wouldn’t end up in hospital now as they wouldn’t meet the threshold. They’re a danger to themselves only. If they were cared for correctly in the community this would work out a lot better for them, but they’re pretty much just medicated up to the point of vegetation and left to it.

Your wife may have had trauma but she chose to take drugs which probably escalated her mental health to the point whereby she needed to be hospitalised. Like I said, poor choices and many of the beds are taken up by people who have abused substances. Certainly in my local hospital anyway.

My dh had a psychotic breakdown four years ago. He's never taken any kind of recreational drugs, it was just the accumulation of a lot of different pressures in his life. He nearly killed me accidentally during his psychotic episode and it was absolutely terrifying. We, too, had police involvement. He'd never had any mental health issues before apart from depression which, looking back, probably wasn't treated properly. He was taken to hospital and then went into an emergency mental health unit. He then went into a rehab type of place for a week that was wonderful (I could have spent a week in there myself!). We then received immediate involvement from the crisis team who were absolutely fantastic. They helped him settle back in at home and they visited everyday and were there for all the family. They were involved with us for three months and he was also put on anti psychotic meds. He then was under the care of the Early Intervention Team for Psychosis for three years and is now under the care of the community mental health team. He still isn't well but is a lot better. Our lives have been turned upside down due to his illness, he lost his job and we lost our home. However, there is light at the end of the tunnel and due to the meds, he is now on an even keel. Please try and get referred to the Early Intervention Team for Psychosis if you can, their help was invaluable and I couldn't have coped without them.

@SparklingMarkling you really aren't adding anything to thread now - you have very little knowledge on addiction and mental health it seems.

Disordered Substance Use IS a mental health condition, it has a separate care pathway originally (due to detox), however, there's a huge overlap in treatment - usually trauma informed, focused, and person led.

The OP has not said anywhere that drug induced psychosis has been diagnosed - psychosis can and does happen to anyone.

Psychosis is often drug induced, especially first episodes in adults. Lots of people only have one episode and recover fully from it. Hopefully he can get help and support and get better from this. Hospital is the best place for him at the moment and you can focus on yourself and the children. Just take one step at a time.

I didn't want to read and run. You are doing everything you should and could have done to this point. Make yourself a cup of tea and take 20 minutes to sit and process what must have been a horrible few days for you.

It might get harder before it gets easier but know that you are doing the right thing by your kids and don't make any rash decisions about the future until you see how things go. Don't put any pressure on yourself other than ensuring your kids and yourself have all the support you need.

If he gets sectioned, it’s the best place for him. They get lots of help, support and medical treatment in order to help them heal. It’s scary visiting-there are lots of double locked doors and you’re not allowed to take anything in which could be used by the patient. Someone close to me had a psychotic episode(stress related) and they were detained for several weeks. The journey they went on from the paranoia on detention to reasonably normal self was amazing. The medication really worked- they will be on it long term but it’s made them able to handle areas so much easier. Best wishes to you and your family.

@Shminty

I have plenty of knowledge thank you and no I don’t think drug use necessarily means you have a mental health condition. Trauma isn’t the catch all excuse for human bahaviour I’m afraid.

I also don’t believe in the us and them mentality that so many people working in mental health encourage but you keep on pretending to be some sort of expert. I find that a big red flag to be honest.

If he’s tripping or had a Coke stroke he’ll come down. And start again.

Addicts annoy MHP cos they hog the beds for the mentally ill, are expensive and not necessarily worth treating - Success rates are low. Unlike the mentally ill.

OP, separate. SS won’t let him back in the house with any luck. If you do, they’ll treat you both as putting your DC at risk.

Sorry stress not areas

You cannot s136 someone isn't when home anyway .

The fact he is using to the extent of psychosis means a referral will need to
Go in but it's really a ticky box exercise.

If he's not there , he's not a danger to the kids - it will just be monitored.