What has the handyman done with my nightdress?!

[Leolly]

I can't find my nightie anywhere! Had a handyman round this morning just to address a couple of patches of damp, one of them being in my bedroom, on the wall close to the en suite.

I hang my nightie and dressing gown on the back of the en suite door every morning, and on the other side of the door I have an old evening dress that belonged to my dm.

I was rushing out this morning and didn't think about moving the clothes off the door. Came back earlier to find he's moved my dressing gown and my dm's dress over to the hooks on the bedroom door. But there's no sign of my nightie.

Im not suggesting for a minute anything dodgy has gone on but - where is it?! Did I, without thinking, put it somewhere? If so, I still can't find it!

Maybe his wife's birthday is coming up. He sees your lovely nighty, and he imagines how lovely Mrs Handyman will look in it. He thinks you're the kind if person who probably has lots of lovely nighties, so you won't miss this one. He took it home and wrapped it in tissue paper, and tied a lovely bow on it. It's currently sitting in the bottom of his wardrobe. He's going to surprise his wife with it on Sunday (her birthday).

@MrsMcisaCt

… and also Father’s day ( wink wink )a true gift to himself

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

It's probs under his pillow along with a couple of pairs of your knicks

I think this Thread should be in Relationships or the Sex topic. It is wasted a bit here.

Could it have dropped in the sink or loo and got wet? Then he chucked it?

Bahahahaha 😂😂

I think he's now using your nightie instead of his curtain ahem wipey wipey

Underminer.... You have away too much time on your hands lol

🤣 this is true! Still no update on where this nightdress is.

Have you looked if it's on the same hanger as your dm's dress. As it's black it could have camouflaged itself in 🤷🏼‍♀️

A mystery like this would drive me bonkers 🤣

If you ever find out what had happened to your nightdress, please let us know. The suspense is killing me.

The suspenders are killing the handyman.

I don’t think that nightdress will be seen again.

Please tell me there is a happy ending to this? 😂

Oh, it definitely involves a happy ending!

Yes. I think the handyman is very happy with his nightdress. He’s looking for a pair of matching earrings and some fluffy slippers, so guard your stuff ladies!

😂

Or a Happy End at least 🤣😂

This is what I think happened.

Firstly, I think the OP is called Polly. The handyman arrived and on tracing the dampness back to a crack, he determined it needed to be filled with some urgency.

The handyman is a skilled craftsman. He likes to leave all his customers deeply satisfied. He had a large bulge in his shorts pocket, which just happened to be a packet of "Polyfilla", just in case it was ever needed.

He got his packet out, carefully guiding it around the heavy nuts he also had inside there, and after a bit of work he was able to whip his paste up. It was very hot on 13 June and the handyman was in danger of dripping, so he stripped down as far as he could to work more efficiently and focus on the job. Once his paste was ready he released it deeply and thickly into OP's damp crack. Polly's needs were immediately fulfilled. On finishing, he noticed a slight trickling out of his paste on one side of the crack and, being a perfectionist, he wanted to leave OP completely happy with his job.

Looking around all he could see was a black cotton garment lying on the floor so he picked it up, carefully and lovingly wiping OP's crack to leave a nice relaxed finish before getting ready to leave. On packing his equipment he noticed his black briefs were missing. It was only then he realised, that after stripping, he had used them to wipe OP's crack. Fearing he had no clean underwear to go home with, he panicked and grabbed OP's nightie which was a bit tight around the shoulders, but would otherwise feel quite 'natural'.

Next week: Polly notices one of her dining room chair's legs are broken, so her carpenter comes to visit her. Within five minutes he has her legs spread over the table and is pushing his wood into a perfectly snug mortis and tenon joint. In the past, Polly has been happy with several short screws, but the carpenter is having none of this as he teases his thick dowel into her hole while holding the end of her legs in his large, powerful hands.

Good Lord.

Fucking hell. Are people still thinking this is hilarious?

What do you think the next step is after he gets bored of just taking things whilst in other people's houses?

Prison

@A303 are you ok ? Are you sexually deprived?

No just going where the spirit of the thread is going.