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Original poster

Any medics out there? I'm worried about my husband

212 replies

TR888 · 13/05/2023 09:08

He's 50. Had a urine infection with quite a lot of blood in Uribe about 12 days ago. Got antibiotics and the infection resolved, only to come back a three days later: very I'll this time, unable to leave bed even for the toilet. Passing urine ok although with less flow.

New antibiotics, seemed to be working and yesterday went out of the house and ate normally. but awful, awful shivering fits the night before and again last night, then profuse sweating. He's up now but we both sense something is very wrong.

He's under GP care and has some prostate test on Wednesday. I'm worried this could be sepsis or some form of organ failure. I think it's time for hospital but he's reluctant.

OP posts:
Willmafrockfit · 13/05/2023 11:13

best of luck to your dh op

DogInATent · 13/05/2023 11:13

TR888 · 13/05/2023 09:17

It's so odd because he has moments when he almost feels back to normal, and then he's got this terrible shivering nd sweating.

Rigors. Possibly a kidney infection that's broken out into the wider body. Dad had this and it was urgent,

A&E now.

Penguin34 · 13/05/2023 11:14

This sounds like my husband
Started off as a urine infection, turned into sepsis b quickly, twice in 3 months.
Go to a & e

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Original poster
TR888 · 13/05/2023 11:15

Yes, I instructed him to use the word sepsis as soon as he got there, rather than give them the lengthy explanation he was planning. 1. Possible sepsis. 2. Two failed antibiotics 3. Extreme night shivering and sweating.

OP posts:
KrasiTime · 13/05/2023 11:15

Glad he’s there and hopefully being taken care of.

Bluelightbaby · 13/05/2023 11:16

Medic here….men’s UTIs can be very stubborn and often IV antibiotics are necessary. Dont bother with 111 they’re pretty useless, I take him to ED

Original poster
TR888 · 13/05/2023 11:16

Me too. He got so annoyed with me, saying I was "panicking" him. But I only wish I'd stood my ground last night.

OP posts:
CalatheaHoya · 13/05/2023 11:17

TR888 · 13/05/2023 11:15

Yes, I instructed him to use the word sepsis as soon as he got there, rather than give them the lengthy explanation he was planning. 1. Possible sepsis. 2. Two failed antibiotics 3. Extreme night shivering and sweating.

Well done OP! Men!

Original poster
TR888 · 13/05/2023 11:18

Good tips re phoning an ambulance (if this was to happen again) and let the medics do the talking, rather than try to convince him. Why is he like this? When he's been very poorly before, he was also digging his feet in and minimising the issues to everyone.

OP posts:
ItsCalledAConversation · 13/05/2023 11:19

Don’t let them give him round after round of antibiotics. This happened to FIL, he was given antibiotics for months for this kind of symptom, it progressed to pneumonia, we took him to A&E where he was admitted, promptly caught MRSA and C-Diff and died within the month having never left hospital. Get him seen, get it sorted asap and don’t let them fuck around.

JusthereforXmas · 13/05/2023 11:20

Sepsis... I have kidney damage and have had this several times.

Likethestarsabove547 · 13/05/2023 11:21

Typical stubborn man lol
Act like they are dying when they have a sniffle but when something quite serious is clearly happening they brush it off and don't want to bother anyone. I'll never understand.
Glad you got him to go and I hope he's better soon!

JusthereforXmas · 13/05/2023 11:23

TR888 · 13/05/2023 11:18

Good tips re phoning an ambulance (if this was to happen again) and let the medics do the talking, rather than try to convince him. Why is he like this? When he's been very poorly before, he was also digging his feet in and minimising the issues to everyone.

An ambulance paramedic wont convince him, they will take his lead... with it being chronic for me others have called ambulances for me, they have always been perfectly happy to leave me in the past and tell me to just make my way in or call them back if I decide I do need them later.

Itsanotherhreatday · 13/05/2023 11:24

Sepsis spikes and raises temp them gots back to normal and then spikes again - which is why it gets missed.

BadNomad · 13/05/2023 11:25

Why is he like this?

It's usually fear. They go into denial and convince themselves it's nothing really, and it will pass if they just give it a few days.

LakieLady · 13/05/2023 11:25

So glad he went, OP.

God knows why men are so reluctant to see doctors when they're ill.

Original poster
TR888 · 13/05/2023 11:25

I didn't know that. Thanks.

OP posts:
Willmafrockfit · 13/05/2023 11:26

i was thinking kidneys.

Giselletheunicorn · 13/05/2023 11:26

Agree, you need to go to A&E to rule out sepsis. My Mum had it and she had a unreal sense of dread. She knew something was very badly wrong....

Silvers11 · 13/05/2023 11:29

Honestly - I would have insisted on going in with him, to make sure he doesn't minimise the situation when he goes in. Hope he does tell them exactly what the position is. Men are awful in that regard, aren't they? I hope he is ok

BitOutOfPractice · 13/05/2023 11:30

I would sort the kids and go back to him tbh op whether he wants you or not. I wouldn’t trust him not to minimise it again.

hope he’s ok.

toomanydicksonthedancefloor1 · 13/05/2023 11:30

Someone above made a really really good point that your DH isn't thinking sensibly because he is so poorly. My DH who had severe sepsis convinced me he was getting better and delayed treatment, when he was talking nonsense he even got up and tried to go out to the car to go to work. I physically pushed him back up the stairs and hid the car keys. He wasn't in his right mind at all and I feel so stupid I didn't know the symptoms of sepsis then.

AbigHoleinmybucket · 13/05/2023 11:31

TR888 · 13/05/2023 09:36

Cosmosqueen I want him to go to hospital but it's he who needs convincing. And can I tell you that your tone has upset me. I'm very worried here, you know.

Thanks to everyone else. I've just talked to him and he's agreed to ask for a hospital referral. Is going to A E best?

I understand. My h is the same. He doesn't 'trust' doctors and hates hospitals even though most of our family are doctors including my dad and his brother.

Tell him he's not just doing it for himself but you too and you'd do it for him if you were in his position.

A and E Go now before it gets too busy.

I do hope he sees someone soon and you will both be OK.

LunaMay · 13/05/2023 11:31

I hope it gets sorted OP, i too would be worried about him minimising while there.

spiderlight · 13/05/2023 11:36

Glad he's gone to hospital. My friend had exactly this last year and ended up in hospital with sepsis. He's fine now, but it was a close-run thing because he lives alone and went very quickly from too stubborn to too ill to seek help.