Ukrainian surrogacy in Ireland

[Deeocal]

This lady has used the help of a Ukrainian surrogate to grow her family, and is also sharing her journey on social media. Sharing to wish them luck on their return journey home ☘️

I believe this is also a journey Rosanna Davison (former miss world?) has undertaken although not in current circumstances.

https://m.independent.ie/news/i-just-want-to-get-home-irish-couple-and-their-newborn-son-shelter-from-bombs-in-ukraine/a1217011592.html

@BattenDownTheHens

How do you know what the surrogate felt about that baby after 9 months of carrying it and giving birth?

I think it's very safe to assume that the baby feels the surrogate is his mother with every fibre of his being. It should be illegal to cause that kind of trauma to a baby.

You're not reading any of the messages about why people find this abhorrent are you op?

That poor baby.

Err, we're not underestimating it.

And make no mistake, this was an exploitative financial transaction, not a gift.

That's really twisted what's been written. People are absolutely judging the Irish couple for exploiting the Ukranian lady. Nobody has had anything but pity for the awful situation people are in in Ukraine, they must be desperate.

I have no idea why I clicked on this thread when I knew it was going to make me feel sick.

I hope the Ukrainian mother is OK. Recovering from birth in her circumstances must be awful.

Infertility is heartbreaking but it doesn’t give someone the right to exploit another woman and buy a baby.

And what have they done for her? Used her body for a year in return for cash, when she was at her most vulnerable, living in a war zone. What have they done for the baby? Taken it from its mother, from everything it knows.

@BattenDownTheHens you can disagree all you like, but the law says the surrogate mother is the baby's mother, and rightly so.
Legally, Mother does not = The woman with the most money despite what people would like.
I agree that this is especially vile in Ireland, given our very recent history with Mother and baby homes. Exactly the same when the rich
( catholic) couples came from America to buy babies from the nuns.
There have been quite a few " positive " stories like this re surrogacy in Irish mainstream media, not sure what's going on. It's all a bit sinister actually, Ireland is quite a worrying place for women at the moment.

I've seen this on Instagram.

Never a word on the welfare of the baby's mother.

Just unconsciable self absorbedness of the couple.

Theur posts are full of sycophantic comments about how brave Jane and her hubby are.

There really are no words for this kind of immorality.

I hope the baby's mother is doing well and has support 💐

I would be curious to see hear the conversation when the baby is 15 or 16-

-Can I meet the woman who gave birth birth to me?

-Well, she was in a war zone..

-I am sure you looked after her though, right? Afterall she gave birth to me?

-No son,we could only take you. We left her there. But - it is what she wanted...

Rubbish.

Unless you've never come across Mumsnet in your life before, you knew exactly what the tone would be.

I’m American so I’m more accustomed to surrogacy and I don’t think it is as black-and-white as most people on MN make it out to be. It would be lovely if everyone everywhere could have a cushy office job but that’s not reality. People use their bodies to earn a living in countless ways — modeling, professional sport, manual labor. I met a surrogate a few years ago through a friend and she was very open about the fact that having her expenses paid during the pregnancy enabled to stay home with her own toddler for an extra year before going back to her job in a nail salon (which she hated).

That being said, I am appalled by the couple in this article. The woman is so concerned about getting herself and her family out of a war zone but has no problem leaving the woman who carried her baby there. And why on earth is she seeking attention for this? The photos of her grinning from ear to ear are disgusting.

Babies are not gifts, they are human beings that have the right not to be treated as a commodity. I wonder when rich women are going to start giving these ‘gifts’ to poor women….? Don’t worry, you don’t need to answer as we all know that’ll never happen.

Tone deaf OP appears to be...

Op why do you think surrogacy is illegal in so many countries worldwide?
Genuine question.

The surrogate isn’t the mother though is she?
She is to the baby

Honestly this story made me feel sick. I have contempt for commercial surrogacy anyway but this is another level and utterly barbaric. Using a woman in a war torn country as a vessel and then leaving her there to take her chances, words utterly fail me.

Quite. The mental gymnastics people go through to justify surrogacy always baffles me.

@ShivWambsgans People use their bodies to earn a living in countless ways — modeling, professional sport, manual labor.
Are you equating creating a human and removing them from their mother to being a basketball player!

Totally selfish to ask a woman to go through pregnancy and childbirth - with an added dash of exploiting a war victim.

This couple are the very definition of selfish. Surrogacy is wrong.

Human trafficking and self-indulgent exploitation of a vulnerable and likely financially desperate women from a war-torn region. If that isn't their insta bio it should be.

I simply cannot believe how self-centred this couple are. They already have a child, but are determined to stop at nothing to get another one. When the first two attempts at surrogacy ended in miscarriages, they were apparently quite prepared to abandon the remainder of the embryos, and were about to go to Cyprus instead. They wanted a baby by any means and they didn't care where it came from or how they got it! They see this baby as a commodity, not a human being.

What about their child at home? They have willingly taken themselves into a war zone in order to collect this baby and are now fearful for themselves and their newborn because they have spent three nights in a bomb shelter. Where is the concern for the woman who has given birth to their child though? Or for the six-year-old they have left behind who could end up without parents if they get caught up in further bombing?

Well what should they have done @unfortunateevents ?