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If you could have ONLY 1 child a boy or a girl which one would you choose?

246 replies

SleepDreamThinkHuge · 21/04/2023 15:56

Someone asked me this question hypothetically if you had no children and you were only destined for one child what would you choose if you had the chance?

OP posts:
Phoebesgift · 22/04/2023 00:25

Definitely girl. Have a wonderful relationship with both my teenage daughters.

DramaAlpaca · 22/04/2023 00:27

Easy question. A boy.

I never wanted girls and I was delighted to have three sons.

Phoebesgift · 22/04/2023 00:38

Easy question. A boy.

I never wanted girls and I was delighted to have three sons.

If you ever wanted a girl it was pretty irresponsible to take the chance 3 times to get pregnant. Luckily for your children you haven't got any daughters!

Doihavetogotoworkdotcom1 · 22/04/2023 01:00

Girl

DramaAlpaca · 22/04/2023 01:26

No need to be so ridiculous and bitchy @Phoebesgift. Just because I didn't particularly want girls doesn't mean I wouldn't have loved them if I'd had them as I'm sure you well know.

Now go away and learn how to quote people on MN.

MrsApplepants · 22/04/2023 02:08

Girl. Thankfully that is what I got

WaitingfortheTardis · 22/04/2023 05:10

I genuinely felt no preference when I was pregnant, we had a girl and I love her to bits.

cptartapp · 22/04/2023 07:39

Threelocusts

www.nber.org/digest/oct04/do-fathers-prefer-sons

cptartapp · 22/04/2023 07:41

There's a wealth of other research too.
Interesting. Dadsnet would read very differently.

BelindaMelinda · 22/04/2023 10:10

I haven’t met anyone in my day to day life who really, really had a preference for a son PRE kids

🙋‍♀️ I did.

I grew up with a house full of sisters. Female aunties, solely female cousins. My dad was pretty much the only man in my whole family. Plus all my friends were girls.

I'll be called out for sexism probably but this was my experience. The bitching. The utter drama. Clothes everywhere, numerous outfit stressy type conversations. Bathroom taken for hours. Make up bothers about running out/sister stealing it/whatever. Stress and more drama about boys/Saturday night/what that bitch Sally did in Maths. Screeching. Holding a grudge after an argument. Spite, sometimes.

I wanted boys. I'd had a bloody gutsful of being in a houseful of girls and women by the time I left home.

I was delighted when dc 1 was a boy. Even more when Dc2 and Dc3 were.

And it's different, totally. There's no drama. They're far simpler creatures. If they argue with a friend or their brother, they give each other a thump and they move on. No bitching, no grudges, no screeching. I can only just get the scruffy buggers in the shower once a day never mind taking over the bathroom for hours. They stick a t shirt and shorts on and out they go.

Appreciate that personalities play a part and my sons are like my DH in that they're very laid back in general. But I've met dozens of their friends over the years and there is a definite, noticible, difference in boys and girls ime. Boys are just (generally) easier.

Anyway, point being, yes some people do have a preference for boys pre dc. I know a couple of friends who were the same - and they also seem to be similar in that they're the ones who grew up in a house full of girls themselves 😂

Kickingupmerrybehaviour · 22/04/2023 10:13

Girl. Without a doubt.

Girliefriendlikespuppies · 22/04/2023 10:19

A girl, i have an only dd so maybe biased though!

aSofaNearYou · 22/04/2023 10:41

And it's different, totally. There's no drama. They're far simpler creatures. If they argue with a friend or their brother, they give each other a thump and they move on. No bitching, no grudges, no screeching. I can only just get the scruffy buggers in the shower once a day never mind taking over the bathroom for hours. They stick a t shirt and shorts on and out they go.

See not only was all the bitching not my experience with all the girls in my life, I would also take bitching over "thumping" any day. Can't stand it when you're around boys and their emotions over tiny things randomly burst out of them into violence. I cannot fathom why people think that is preferable. Seems to me they are more emotional with less regulation, and I just have no empathy for the random urge towards violence.

Judelawswife68 · 22/04/2023 11:11

DramaAlpaca · 22/04/2023 01:26

No need to be so ridiculous and bitchy @Phoebesgift. Just because I didn't particularly want girls doesn't mean I wouldn't have loved them if I'd had them as I'm sure you well know.

Now go away and learn how to quote people on MN.

You said you NEVER wanted girls, not that you didn't particularly want them. Don't change your tune because because you were stupid to get pregnant knowing you had a 50% chance of having one.

Coffeeandbourbons · 22/04/2023 11:21

aSofaNearYou · 22/04/2023 10:41

And it's different, totally. There's no drama. They're far simpler creatures. If they argue with a friend or their brother, they give each other a thump and they move on. No bitching, no grudges, no screeching. I can only just get the scruffy buggers in the shower once a day never mind taking over the bathroom for hours. They stick a t shirt and shorts on and out they go.

See not only was all the bitching not my experience with all the girls in my life, I would also take bitching over "thumping" any day. Can't stand it when you're around boys and their emotions over tiny things randomly burst out of them into violence. I cannot fathom why people think that is preferable. Seems to me they are more emotional with less regulation, and I just have no empathy for the random urge towards violence.

Sofa, do you only have girls? Because you’re going beyond objective discussion and just sound a bit ‘chip on the shoulder’ now. Other people have stated their reasons, why are you so invested in proving your point?

GETTINGLIKEMYMOTHER · 22/04/2023 11:23

2 dds, and I can’t say I ever really had a preference. I had a health scare when pregnant with dd2, and was just so relieved to have a second healthy baby.

Dh is one of 4 boys, and never showed the slightest desire for a boy - he’s very close to both dds, now long grown up.

My MiL used to say boys were easier - I never asked how on earth she’d know, having had no girls! Our dds were alway easy, even during the so-called ‘terrible two’ and teen years. I dare say we were just lucky, though.

Easterfunbun · 22/04/2023 12:16

@BelindaMelinda

I agree boys are easier. My sons are pretty fab and easier than my daughter. Bigger picture though? I wouldn’t have wanted only sons and I’m very glad I didn’t. Daughters come into their own as adult women.

Easterfunbun · 22/04/2023 12:19

@Holly60

I knew someone would pop along and say your poor boys lol. I love my sons very much and they love me. Thankfully though I know how these things could potentially pan out. I would hope they were man enough to prioritise their wives over me when they’re adult men. So yes, sons do need to cut the apron strings in a way that adult daughters don’t. Personally I think my future daughter in laws will really like me 😜.

aSofaNearYou · 22/04/2023 12:27

Sofa, do you only have girls? Because you’re going beyond objective discussion and just sound a bit ‘chip on the shoulder’ now. Other people have stated their reasons, why are you so invested in proving your point?

I don't believe my comments are in any way out of step with others on this thread, I've only commented a couple of times and said similar things to others. I'm not proving my point, I'm just discussing like everyone else.

Coffeeandbourbons · 22/04/2023 12:37

@aSofaNearYou to my ears (well, eyes) they’re way out of step! This is one of those discussions that’s inherently emotional and a bit illogical, trying to pin certain posters down and beat them over the head with your anecdata doesn’t work. You just seem to be taking it all a bit personally that’s all

aSofaNearYou · 22/04/2023 12:41

Coffeeandbourbons · 22/04/2023 12:37

@aSofaNearYou to my ears (well, eyes) they’re way out of step! This is one of those discussions that’s inherently emotional and a bit illogical, trying to pin certain posters down and beat them over the head with your anecdata doesn’t work. You just seem to be taking it all a bit personally that’s all

Well, you're wrong. I just read someone's opinion and used it as a springboard to share a related opinion. There are loads of comments like that on this thread. There wasn't even a back and forth between me and that poster, they're welcome to their opinion.

I'm not taking anything personally, I just find the subject interesting. Really not sure why you're singling me out.

Coffeeandbourbons · 22/04/2023 12:48

Well, you're wrong.

😆

Coffeeandbourbons · 22/04/2023 12:49

The tone of your messages is just way more sensitive and outraged than the others, that’s all. Like I said don’t take it personally, it’s one of those topics which is inherently illogical and why somebody feels a certain way doesn’t need a ‘logical explanation’.

Hubblebubble · 22/04/2023 12:50

I always wanted a girl, but now I have my boy and he's perfect.

Hubblebubble · 22/04/2023 12:51

A friend who was pregnant at the same time said she really wanted a cheeky little boy, but she ended up with a girl. She's equally happy. Funny how things go!