What is the most CF behaviour someone has shown when visiting your home?

[Imamumgetmeoutofhere]

Just that really......

Mine was a few years ago and I'm still whenever I think about it.

My youngest had started primary school a few months prior to the event and she had got a bit friendly with one of the other children in the class and as a result I had got to know their mum quite well, in terms of chatting in the playground anyway.

We had storm one morning on the school run and as it was much closer to my house than hers I invited her back for a cuppa till the storm passed. I put the kettle on to boil and then went to the loo, then had to take an "urgent" phone call from my eldest school for some reason or other, can't remember what exactly and it certainly wasn't an emergency.

When I was upstairs I heard some clattering around in the kitchen and then heard a sizzling noise.

When I went back downstairs she was frying bacon. She hadn't asked, I hadn't offered and it meant she had gone through my fridge and cupboards the first time she had been to my house. When I asked what she was doing she said she was hungry and hadn't eaten that day

Safe to say I didn't ask her to come back after that!!

What CF behaviours have others shown in your home?

It wasn't my home, so not strictly on topic. But I was once in this place where a lot of people were sharing funny and lighthearted anecdotes one after the other and it was a lot of fun. And then some people decided, inexplicably, to take over the conversation and make it a heartfelt sharing of ideas about religion.

It was very odd and I really wished they could find their own space for this very specific and off topic discussion.

My sister in law suggested that we convert the third floor of our family home into an apartment for her and her kids to have sleepovers in whenever they feel like at our own expense. She told me it would be a real treat for us since we would get to see her daughter more often (she lives a 15 minutes away by car). The third floor is where my DH and I both have our offices. Where would we work?

Agree!

Then people could say most overtly Atheist people are quite cuntish though.

The thread is being derailed, they should fuck off already!

Held a garden party for my DH's big birthday, long time ago now. We had a mini marquee, a jazz singer, and for once I got someone in to do the food, as a treat. Everything was outside, drinks etc, and it was lovely weather

NDN was a pain in the arse but I asked a few neighbours as a nice thing to do. She was the only vegetarian coming. Even so the caterers particularly did two vegetarian dishes which I made sure were marked up and she went first to the buffet. There was lots to eat including delicious desserts.

The caterers cleared up and were about to go. I needed to pay by cheque (this is a long time ago!). I went into my kitchen and NDN was rooting about at the fridge. I asked her what she was doing.
She said she was STARVING and was just doing herself a plate of cheese from what she could find in the fridge. 🥱😮

I said... I'd rather you didn't thank you, there is plenty of food outside.
Cheeky cow

Touché!

Yip! One was a 3 bedroom new build so nothing remarkable (and they had lived there for 8 years or so before we went there). The other two were acquaintances of my parents who had done well-ish in life and moved to bigger houses. But again, just bigger houses. It really is quite a strange thing to do I guess 😅

😂
If there was a 'CF Mumsnet edition', thread derailers would be at the top of my list!

😄. Maybe it's just a kind of "My home is my castle" thing. It can be a source of immense pride for some people, I suppose.

After the first time I was quite firm about it the next time, and tend to suggest we go out or already have something cooking when they come. But it happened again the last time they came because I had been out myself and they were just seeing my DP and children. I got home around teatime to find him making pasta with ingredients I was planning to use the following day. DP doesn't mind it so he'd just left him to it, even though he knows I hate it!

LTB immediately! 🤣

Actually if he quotes Shrek I can forgive him 😆

Well said !😂😂
Popped on for a catch up today and wished I hadn’t bothered.

MIL and FIL were visiting, when we noticed 💩 on the rug 🤢

I was mortified having cleaned before they arrived! We hadn't lived here long and I wanted to give a good impression of our home.

I assumed it was our cat first but realised it was dog 💩 and started checking children's shoes.

Then got down on my hands and knees scrubbing the rug and apologising for the smell, noticed that the trail led to where FIL was sitting..

He'd clearly trampled dog 💩 all through our house and was saying nothing.

When I asked if he could have trodden in something and to check his shoes he outright denied it being him and blamed the kids, didn't offer to help and watched me cleaning up 💩 for a good 10 minutes.

When they left I noticed he'd helped himself to a carrier bag and was carrying his shoes in it rather than wearing them! Never mentioned a thing or apologised!

@AngelofTroy what a dickhead! Did DH not give him an earful?

Thank fuck the thread is getting getting back on track with a shit-stomping FIL, after the foray into ‘sycophantic Christian swearing support group’ territory.

Yes!!!!

They don't have that sort of relationship.. it was never mentioned again!

Telling DD about this thread and she would like to add her own. When I had an old uni friend over for coffee she brought her own DD along unexpectedly, however she’s the same age as DD (10 at the time) so no big deal. She arrived holding a battered and clearly well read copy of a HP book and wearing a HP T-shirt, DD excitedly told her she was reading the same book. I had made lemon drizzle loaf because I know it’s DF’s favourite and her DD announced I hate lemon drizzle, what else do you have?! My DD took her, got snacks and invited her to the tv room where we have games, books etc - she asked if FDD (friends DD) would like to see her HO stuff too and all seemed to go well.
That night DD went to read her book and couldn’t find it, but saw FDD had left her copy and said perhaps she had lifted hers by accident or just left hers behind and DD had misplaced her own copy. I text DF and she said no, her DD was sat reading her book so the copy at ours must be my DD’s. I explained no, definitely not her copy as it’s part of a box set and different artwork on the cover. DF doubled down that her DD was absolutely reading her own book and we must be mistaken - only her DD’s book, complete with her name bookmark was very much still here. We never invited them back.

@QuickNameChangeForMeToday I would have loved to see your DFDD squirm if you'd taken a photo of the book plus bookmark in response!

Best friend and her new bf came round to see my new house-he started opening the cupboards asking what was for tea saw some tins and said that will do

no i didnt cook for him

I hope no one minds me asking about the bum jug. Surely pouring a stream of water down your bum crack isn't going to provide enough agitation to remove any stubborn debris, as it were. I've used the "bum gun" things in Thailand and they were very effective but it seems to be the force of the water that enables the cleaning rather than the water itself. Or is it with the jug you are supposed to dip your hand in and then agitate bum crack with your hand to remove debris? This isn't intended to be offensive, it's just the sort of thing I've wondered about and can't ask anyone in real life.

Well how else do you expect to clean your 💩? Dry toilet paper won't do the trick

It is why bidets were invented.

Love these, people are just unbelieveable! 😂

My cousin has real form for this, but the last time I had her over to stay was for DH's 40th birthday. She stayed over for a few days, didn't bring anything, no present, not a bottle of wine, nothing. At the birthday party I found her at our drinks cabinet helping herself to DH's single malt whiskey. There was lots of wine and fizz in the party area.

She didn't help with anything but lay in the guest room the next day which was a Sunday and DH being in orders he worked all day from early morning to lunchtime. When he came home from work she turned up at the kitchen door asking what's for lunch.

A couple of months later she messaged saying she wanted to celebrate her big birthday at ours. I said no. Haven't seen her since.

I had a close friend's niece and her friend stay with me for just over a week. They were both 20, I had met the niece once and never met the friend.

They didn't bring a gift, spent every evening hogging the couches by lying on them and watching the Simpsons at top volume. They did have money for lots of shopping and sightseeing in the daytime but for some reason never went out at night. If I spoke to them it was a completely one-way conversation, I would ask a question, they would give a short answer, rinse and repeat. I gave up in the end and ended up sitting in my bedroom as I found it so awkward.

On the morning they left there was a big kerfuffle with one of them crying because her ipad had broken as she had packed her bag so full of new purchases. When they left I went downstairs and saw a wrapped up item and note on the table. I thought how sweet, at least they had left a little gift and thank you note. But no, it was a souvenir mug she couldn't fit in her bag and asked me to post to the US (and left me no postage money).

I mean, they weren't the worst, and I was a thoughtless dick at that age as well, but it was an uncomfortable week and put me off having guests that I don't know really well.