I’m watching an affair unfold in front of me.

[AnyoneElse1982]

I don’t usually notice this stuff. I won’t be saying a word to anyone. But I can see an affair going on. It’s a neighbour of mine.

I’m seeing him with the OW more and more. She’s a friend of a friend (hence I notice her) very attractive. I’ve just seen them in the coffee shop together now.

I feel sad for my lady neighbour. I can see that even if something hasn’t actually happened (because how would I know) her H sees this OW is a lot, I see them together most days now, neighbour is a teacher. I do an early school run so see her leave. Each morning I see her H and OW walking together when I get back. It’s entirely coincidental my timings match.

I won’t say a word, but I can see it in front of me, body language has changed over time between them.

im only putting it here because I won’t be saying a word as I can’t know for sure. But I strongly suspect. It’s not something that would bother me, just I’m seeing it out of no choice of mine unfold in front of me.

CockysGirl · Today 12:56

"My BF is male and we are always out and about together when not working - walks, coffee etc and sometimes with our DPs too"

most confusing sentence ever. Did anyone else not read the above and assume that "BF" meant "boyfriend" not "best friend"??

BabyST · Today 13:02

Many many men especially those in their 40s and 50s absolutley salivate at the idea of an opportunity to have an affair with a woman in her 20s.

And the reality is, however uncomfortable, that there are more than plenty of women in their 20s who are up for this.

@millymog11 thus is true I guess

What’s so wrong with anyone posting anonymous gossip? This site runs on it. We don’t know who anyone is on here. We don’t know whether the situation posted is true or not.
So what if OP wants to gossip, or wants us to give advice, or just wants to have a chat about anything, or is writing their umpteenth novel with details gleaned off a MN thread? These things are all potential givens in an anonymous chat forum.

Don't encourage OP ddd.

She'll be stalking them in a trenchcoat, & trying to film them through windows.

It's certainly not the raciest affair is it?
Walking the streets & going for coffee.

2/10 for effort on your lady neighbour's H's part.

Having been through being cheated on by my Ex, I’d always tell a woman now, even if I wasn’t 100%. It’s obviously up to you OP, but to me cheating is a form of emotional abuse to the victim, the wife in this case, and I could not watch it happen. Her husband will be treating his wife with smug disdain probably, she will have no idea why he’s disconnected from her and the mental toll is extreme.

They might just be friends. My husband's best friend is female and they go for lunch and walks together.

You'd need something to tell before you could decide whether or not to tell it.

Didn't Billy Joel do a song about careless talk?

I used to meet up with my male best friend every Friday after work for a drink. The pub staff were all lovely, really friendly, got to know us by name, even started pouring our usual drinks just as we came in the door.

I'd told DH how nice it was, and eventually we decided to go there together for a drink so he could try it out too. We walked in, silence. No welcome from the staff except a rather stilted "Hello, what can I get you?". No chat, just a strange atmosphere. DH and I were a bit confused, and we actually wondered if they'd been given bad news, like they were all being made redundant or something. We left after one drink, and as we were leaving I glanced over at the barman, still confused, and he gave me a big wink and did that comedy 'touching the side of your nose' thing.

I then finally realised that they thought that my work friend was my partner and that DH was the Other Man! 😂

It's upsetting watching this sort of stuff unfolding, and it probably is what you think it is. Maybe best thing is for you to try to find a different route so not confronted with it.

See, I really wouldn't be happy with this AT ALL.

You sound deluded, bored and quite weird..I wouldn't like to have someone like you for a neighbour. It would worry me.

It's a well-known fact that most affairs start at the opticians.

Optometrists are shady bastards, & like nothing more than colluding in affairs & encouraging trysts in darkened test rooms.

A very dear friend of mine discovered her DH was having an affair with a woman he knew on the school run. She was devastated but said what made it worse was finding out how many people knew about and saw it unfolding literally at the school gates but didn't tell her or warn her to check it out . An anonymous note would have been preferable she said, rather than gossiping to each other, maybe stopped it getting more serious

Yeah, I must admit that I have never understood this. When I was in my 20s I never looked at men in their 40s and 50s at all. They just weren’t on my radar as sexual beings in any way.

Sorry been doing the day job (not for GCHQ or MI6)!

So I can categorically say that their ‘connection’ shows they’re attracted to each other. The OW was looking H very intently, they were literally 2 inches from each other. Their entire bodies were turned towards each other. I think it’s just at the start, if anything a friendship based on a mutual attraction.

The coffee shop is near the school, they could have walked there together after school run, but but but H works from home (as do I so when I walk out for my break I see him at this desk), he also takes his kids to wraparound at our local school (because my kids used to attend the same school) so I saw them at c.9am. Unless his kids didn’t go to wraparound and they did the school run together?

They’re late 30s probably.

You have no idea what is going on between these two, and it’s none of your business. If, as has been suggested by some, you decide to start conversations with the neighbour about how you saw her husband out and about with some woman you will sound absolutely batshit.

In my experience (cheated on) nothing can stop this affair once the wheels are in motion. People are selfish and they believe they have a right to happiness, that’s how affairs flourish.

If they really are starting an affair, any intervention from you is pointless. Focus on your own life, leave them to it.

(I’m not condoning affairs, but this is a hard lesson I’ve learned).

The types of comments regarding platonic male/female friendships always have me wondering if bisexual people are never allowed any friends at all. Or if I'm not allowed any female friends (I'm a gay woman) 'cause I'll obviously be banging them...

You shouldn't even be posting on a women's forum really Midlander. People will TALK.

I’m not saying a thing to ANYONE but it’s happening in front of me and I’m posting on an anon forum.

This thread is hilarious. I strongly doubt it's even genuine, but if it is: OP, for the sake of your poor unsuspecting neighbours, you need to get a [different] hobby before you're unable to stop yourself reporting your suspicions to the Infidelity SAS. Your quiet cul-de-sac will never be the same again...

👀