When people suddenly/without warning

[JoonT]

A few weeks ago I had a (sort of) argument with a family member. I don’t know how it came up, but someone mentioned dying, and how they’d like to go. I said “I want to go suddenly, just sitting in a chair with a glass wine, and not know anything about it...those close to me know I love them, so there’s no need to say goodbye.” This other family member said “no one dies just like that - it’s almost always slow and horrible” She’s quite a bitter, angry person, who picks arguments, so I let it drop. But people DO go just like that? Don’t they? I mean, sat in front of the TV, or whatever. I must admit I’ve never known it happen. My own experiences of death have all been pretty horrible, and I’ve never known anyone die suddenly, or instantly.

Yes, people do. Friend of mine: her husband went to make her a drink. Came back and she had died.

There are pros and cons both ways.

*asked where

If its an Aneurysm, its pretty much over straight away with no chance of being saved. So you are right that plenty of people do die suddenly and without any warning.

She’s quite a bitter, angry person, who picks arguments, so I let it drop

MN in a nutshell. I can't just have a opinion on something: I have to tell you that the person that I'm talking about is a complete bastard so everyone will agree with me. Works every time

Yep. My friend when in their sleep at 29.

My nan went exactly like that, I'm so grateful she didn't suffer. She was laughing and joking with everyone just an hour before

Yes. "Widowmaker" heart attach and aneurism. Both can occur suddenly. Have had family members die from both.

That's incredibly sad at 29, I'm so sorry

My DH died suddenly of a cardiac arrest whilst watching tv. The doctor told me it was a wonderful way to die as it was so quick he wouldn’t have realised what was happening. This comforted me a little at the time, but my God, it was extremely traumatic to find him, and heartbreaking not to have been able to say goodbye and tell him how much I loved him.

My great grandma dropped dead whilst making a cheese sandwich.. they found the cheese on the worktop, the bread buttered and her on the floor holding a knife.
Another lady I worked with died in her sleep, unfortunately she was fairly young to die and her family found it hard to accept because it was so sudden but her daughter found her in bed, still warm under the covers and looking peaceful. So yeah, it does happen.

My Father-in-law went out on New Year's Eve (with his wife and some friends), had a couple of beers, a bit of adance, then sat down and dropped dead of a massive heart attack.

My grandfather dropped dead on a hike. Coroner said he was gone before he hit the ground. He'd been paragliding the day before.

Yes they do OP. My relative was just waiting for her cup of tea and had gone peacefully before she drank it.

Yes, my DMum died recently like this. She had breakfast, sat her in armchair and then had a massive stroke. She passed away a couple of hours later but they were pretty confident she knew nothing about it from the point she had the stroke.

This is hopeful. I really want to drift off as if falling asleep.

Thanks @Daisybee6 it was such a shock when we all heard, close group of friends all chatting via text the night he went and that was it. Certainly makes you reconsider the things that you worry about day by day that really are insignificant

A very close family member died last month in this way - had a cuppa with a neighbour, went back home, sat on the sofa, played on her phone, bought a bingo ticket for the game on her phone, died before the game ended 😢 natural causes 🤷‍♀️😢

My grandmother went to sleep and never woke up. DH's grandad was mowing the lawn when he died- just keeled over.

I agree with the Op but it has nothing to do with this sentence. I've witnessed alot of people dying. People do die suddenly...

My MIL's partner died just like that watching TV with a cup of tea beside him 3 weeks ago, completely out of the blue.

My own Auntie died instantly whilst standing at the cooker frying fishcakes. They reckon she was dead before she hit the floor.

Yes, in my family we've had quite a few who've gone like switching out a light.

One had just sat down on the garden bench with his cup of tea; one had just sat up after his nap for a cup of tea; and one was sitting quietly in his armchair. Possibly waiting for a cup of tea...

My takeaway from this: drink lots of tea when you're ready to go.

My mum's cousin had a heart attack at the bus stop waiting for his bus to work. He sincerely loved his job so would probably have been in a happy mood, and the paramedics said he'd have known nothing of it. Plus they said he was incredibly healthy (other than being dead!) so no problems beforehand.

Also saw a man walk into a church, sit down for the service and die about 20 minutes later.

Both my parents died suddenly. Dad was driving but luckily didn’t crash and my Mum was in her conservatory. Dad was only in his 60s and my Mum was in her 80s .
Am glad she didnt end up with Dementia and had full MC . A huge shock but I am forever thankful that she died how she did .

Yes quite often. Lucky them.,

My great uncle (93) died in his chair. He'd been for his morning stroll round the corner shop with his DW (89) for milk biscuits and his paper. Had been chatting with neighbours and had felt a bit funny. So they went in and my auntie said to go and sit in his chair and she'd bring him a brew. He was dead by the time she'd brought it through. They'd been married for 70 years, a good way for him to go but what a shock for her! (She's still live and kicking at 92!)