How to bag a rich husband?

[Sugarfish]

I’m not really looking for a rich husband, I’m in a very happy long term relationship with my average earning partner, but I’ve seen a lot of threads here where women are married to dh’s who earn over 6 figures. And I’m just being nosey about how you met. Currently have covid and bored but also genuinely interested. Especially if you’re from different “classes” as I’m from a working class family and in my circles, no one earns close to that so I would not know where to look even if I did want to “marry well” as my mother would call it!

If you come from a high earning family, did you always have an expectation that you’d have a certain lifestyle so specifically chose someone with a high earning job? Or are you also a high earner and met through work / uni. If you’re a low earner compared to your husband, do you ever feel like he thinks he’s more important in the relationship because of this, and how did you meet him?

Also to switch it round for fairness, if you’re the higher earner, how did you meet and does your dh ever feel threatened? Do people ever comment on it?

Have any of you ever faced and snobbery / reverse snobbery due to your choice of Partner?

You gotta go for 4. It’s a numbers game innit.

@WeAreBorg
my route of total luck. Play a stupid online game and then meet someone from your ‘alliance’ in real life. Ridiculous really

what’s interesting to me is that he has very much earned it himself but seems totally disinterested in it. He works really hard and clearly has done for years but the money doesn’t seem to be much of a driver. I’m pretty sure I could spend whatever I fancied of it and he wouldn’t care. It’s hard to explain really!

I’m off to the gym right now. The make up is on!

I’ve read up on the news as instructed so am going to open with “so this lifetime allowance eh, I’d like to breach yours 😉”

Feeling confident

WeAreBorg
How about hang around Canary Wharf in your gym gear?

My DH probably didn't look a great catch when I met him at a party, he was sofa surfing with a guitar and his clothes in bin bags! I then had quite a lot of success (creatively and financially) and we ended up working together. He then started streaking ahead (financially) and unfortunately I developed health issues which meant I had to to take a step back so am now a SAHM and can't work.

We have had such an odd trajectory in many ways, with each one fully supporting the other at certain times, lots of financial ups and downs. I feel lucky and grateful that he earns so much right now. I also know that situations can change dramatically and friends who did ultimately marry for money have ended up trapped and utterly miserable when the money has run out....

When you are in your twenties/thirties go and hang round social events where there are male lawyers. For the most part they are fairly socially challenged (either one end of the ego spectrum or the other - ultra shy/ no empathy a bit weird or raging egotists), fairly ugly and a bit desperate. As time goes by they start making a packet. This suddently makes them attractive and they start having affairs with any young woman who will take the bait but you'll have a v wealthy husband if you get in early enough.

ChesapeakeFan, beautifully observed (and I have seen this play out a number of times!). Unfortunately you still have to sleep with them...

My friend is married to a high earner. They met at University. He is a normal guy from a completely normal suburban background, but he’s a super-bright maths & tech geek, and he landed a graduate traineeship at an Investment Bank in the City. He now does something very obscure & very technical which pays very well.

Work hard at school
Go to a good university to study a traditional course
Meet a fellow student
Ensure that you both have good careers and a high earning potential.
Get married and ensure that you both maintain your careers.

Both WC here, he grew up in council house inner city. We met at university. In our 30s now, have both earned six figures but me not right now as care for our son. We used to sleep on a mattress on the floor in our twenties. We were very broke. Lovely to have shared this journey with him.

Flawless plan, can't fail, let us know how it goes! 💪😆💰

DH is a high earner. We met at work - both as new graduates so he wasn't earning much then. I could be a high earner too (given that we had exactly the same job when we met!) but stepped back for the kids. He is fully aware of this, so there's definitely no imbalance in our relationship despite him earning a lot more.

I'm the high earner in our marriage. We met as students, at a conference, in a third country (we are from different countries). His passions led him to a public job, mine led me to the City but that was made possible by him taking paternity leave and allowing me to go back to work as well as him choosing jobs that offer flexibility over salary packages.

This is only partially me being flippant: but the easiest way for me was to earn that myself because then they don't worry about you sponging. We met.at uni after studying for the same degree.

I married him and then he got rich so like to think I had something to do with that 😄

Met at a party age 18 & 21

Met at cambridge doing our studies.

Met at work. We were both high earners, although still young then. He now earns a lot more than I do (I have chosen to work part time). I don't feel there's any imbalance as I more than pull my weight in the family. I am from a high earning family so I suppose I probably do have certain expectations, but would have carried on with the high earning career path if I needed/wanted to.

He wasn't rich when I met him, in fact I earned more. Then he quit his job to go self employed. I was so annoyed, stressed about the added pressure. About 3 months in he had a huge twist of fate to do with his new business and made over half a million in the space of a few weeks, went on to build the company and money is no longer something he ever has to think about.

Not everyone marrys into it, sometimes you get lucky on an average joe 😂

Met DH at a fire breathing course in our late 20s. I was very WC, in fact I was a single mum on benefits and living in a council flat at the time. DH is from a US middle class family- he is less hung up about class than most English men I've met. I knew he had a good job when we met (works in tech) but he's a multi millionaire now, which I didn't expect at all.

I'm a sahm and we have 2 dc. I've been taking care of our investments since we got married and now my income from those exceeds his salary. He's very hands-on and we're a partnership. He's wealthier than most of my friends but not ostentatious about it and very down to earth, so few people had any idea until we had dc. (Then we sent them to a posh nursery and prep school, and bought a 4 storey townhouse in zone 2, which made our wealth more difficult to hide).

@MintTeaAndChocolate Wow this sounds like a fairytale! Is she happy? Did she change?

Sorry to disappoint, but we met when we were young and both in NMW jobs!

I was doing my law degree and he was setting up his own business. I earned quite well in my job but his salary was 5x what mine was after 10 years.

He just sold the first company he set up for a few million and has two other companies still going strong.

Both of us WC backgrounds.

When I met my husband, he was earning £18k a year in admin. He did a truckload of professional exams, got into private banks, moved jobs a few times until he'd worked his way up to his last position. He was from a solid working class family, the only one of his siblings to not work a manual job, didn't go to Uni either.

This exactly. DH and I met when we were both doing graduate degrees. He was a young idealist who was going to go into politics and change the world. That didn't pan out, so now he's a banker 😂.

He was always crazy hardworking and very ambitious. I knew he was going to go far whatever he decided to do.

Both from MC backgrounds, but his are far more upper MC class than mine. My DM is in peak Hyacinth Bucket territory.

Loiter about in Corner Shops and suss out the chaps buying lots of scratch cards.

Surely one of them has to get a big win one day?

(Not worked for me yet and I've spent a small fotune on Red Bull and Haribos whilst I wait... 🙁

How to bag a rich husband? Be a rich woman.