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Just caught my neighbours bonking

134 replies

PawsAndReflection · 27/02/2023 01:43

To preface, I wish this were a joke.

I live on the top two floors of a terraced house with another flat below. Been here for a few years and had new neighbours move in downstairs about 5 months ago, haven't really spoken to them apart from a couple of months ago when we had a leak.

I've been home this weekend visiting my Mum who's broken her leg, and ended up not getting home until about an hour ago (hence the late hour).

I unlocked the front door and lugged my bags in, only to be greeted with a pale, hairy backside pumping away(!) Seems the two of them were going at it on the stairs leading up to my place. They didn't notice for a few seconds until I dropped my keys, then scrabbled about rearranging their clothes and racing into their front door.

I'm all for getting my rocks off but would really rather they did it elsewhere Blush there's a wet patch on my stairs now

OP posts:
RiverSkater · 27/02/2023 01:51

They were shagging in the communal hall? 😮

Maybe they like the thrill but jeees that's foul

Awwlookatmybabyspider · 27/02/2023 02:01

Is that not classed as indecent exposure.

Aquamarine1029 · 27/02/2023 02:03

Gross. How disgusting.

WinterMusings · 27/02/2023 02:09

Take pity on them. They have a ground floor flat with no internal stairs! They probably thought at that hour you'd be tucked up in bed!

Mothership4two · 27/02/2023 02:17

How very weird but quite funny. Please update @PawsAndReflection when you next come face to face with them 😳😳

Theoldwoman · 27/02/2023 02:45

And why would you think the need to post about it on a public forum?

discobrain · 27/02/2023 02:51
frenchfancy81 · 27/02/2023 02:57

Theoldwoman · 27/02/2023 02:45

And why would you think the need to post about it on a public forum?

You could say that about almost anything on here...

Summer2424 · 27/02/2023 04:09

Hi @PawsAndReflection not very nice to arrive home and see that. I think they're probably feeling really embarrassed about it, i know i would be!

Mummyoflittledragon · 27/02/2023 04:24

Yuk. Tell them about the wet patch. Ask them to pay for the carpet to be cleaned.

WombatsAndGumTrees · 27/02/2023 04:34

That's inappropriate of them. I once had to knock on a neighbours door and ask them to keep their curtains shut when they were busy during the day (because the kids like to play outside and it was in full view). Fortunately that was all it took to correct things.

RobertsRadio · 27/02/2023 06:01

The wet patch on the stairs, yuk.

StrictlyAFemaleFemale · 27/02/2023 06:08

I'd almost forgotten the word bonking. Can we bring that back?

LetThemEatTurnips · 27/02/2023 06:14

Hopefully they are embarrassed not excited about getting caught!

Do you own the stairs or are they communally owned? I think I'd ask them not to do it there again (I'm very good at keeping a straight face during awkward conversations).

heldinadream · 27/02/2023 06:16

But this is wonderful. If they ever make unsocial noise, leave their rubbish in the wrong bin, any transgressions at all, all you will have to do is raise a single eyebrow and tilt your head to the most minimal angle and look knowingly at them. You now have the power. 😂

MrsDoyle351 · 27/02/2023 06:17

Theoldwoman · 27/02/2023 02:45

And why would you think the need to post about it on a public forum?

Because it is actually pretty funny! Grin

Maybe lighten up a little

mikado1 · 27/02/2023 06:18

Bonking 😆 😆

Emmamoo89 · 27/02/2023 06:21


sizeofahippo · 27/02/2023 06:23

And why would you think the need to post about it on a public forum?

I thought that too but I'm glad the OP did, this is brilliant.
Please update after you next see them, would love to know if they say anything / apologise for the stain on the stairs 😂

cantgetabus · 27/02/2023 06:26

Oh my word! 🤣

jellybar · 27/02/2023 06:41

Theoldwoman · 27/02/2023 02:45

And why would you think the need to post about it on a public forum?

Why would you think to step into the spotlight and publicly scold someone for posting publicly on a public forum... Etc etc 😂

TheSandgroper · 27/02/2023 06:46
Fraaahnces · 27/02/2023 06:47

I’d be putting some paper towels and some Zoflora in a plastic bag with a note saying “sort out the wet spot ASAP!”

ThePoshUns · 27/02/2023 06:49

Ewww. I hope they are suitably embarrassed.

Ilovelurchers · 27/02/2023 07:03

I hope you weren't distressed by it or anything OP - I realise some people might be due to last experience etc.

If you are feeling OK about it, then actually it's really quite funny! Presumably it was the "doing it on some stairs" aspect that drew them? Stairs fetishists, trapped in a ground floor flat? The struggle is real.....

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