To preface, I wish this were a joke.
I live on the top two floors of a terraced house with another flat below. Been here for a few years and had new neighbours move in downstairs about 5 months ago, haven't really spoken to them apart from a couple of months ago when we had a leak.
I've been home this weekend visiting my Mum who's broken her leg, and ended up not getting home until about an hour ago (hence the late hour).
I unlocked the front door and lugged my bags in, only to be greeted with a pale, hairy backside pumping away(!) Seems the two of them were going at it on the stairs leading up to my place. They didn't notice for a few seconds until I dropped my keys, then scrabbled about rearranging their clothes and racing into their front door.
I'm all for getting my rocks off but would really rather they did it elsewhere
there's a wet patch on my stairs now