I am currently wearing one of DD's nappies as a makeshift sanitary pad...what's the most unglamorous moment of your life so far?!

[BarbaraVineFan]

I have been on the coil since 2020 and literally never had a period or anything approaching one. Randomly tonight I have come on my period and had nothing in the house :/ no friends locally enough to ask and DD asleep so couldn't go to a shop.. Hence the nappy trick (which feels a bit like wearing an entire roll of loo roll in my knickers!)

I think this might be a new low in the unglamorous stakes, even for me. Can anyone top this?!

I've have bladder problems that regularly cause incontinence and I have peed myself far too many times to count as a result. I'd say my lowest moment was definitely one of the times it's happened in public and I've had to wrap a jacket around myself until I could get changed. And yes I do wear pads 🙄 but they aren't always enough in a flood 😳. But this thread has made me feel a lot better in realising that almost everyone has embarrassing accidents/situations.

No need to apologize, it is hilarious to me...fifty years after the fact. As is the occasion when my halter top blew its shoudler strap in the middle of a store, leaving my...erm...( . ) ( . )s on display to all and sundry.

Unless you have IBD yourself you shouldn't speak about things you know nothing about! I have IBD so I know what she's talking about. For me, I'm always debating with myself, is it just wind or something more? It feels like wind so should I just risk it or go to the toilet just in case? Let's just say I learned the hard way that it's better to be safe than sorry and go to the toilet just in case.

I once went to a wedding with DH which involved an overnight stay.
Had too much champagne and a horrible hangover the following morning.
On the way home in the car I had to vomit into a Sainsbury’s carrier bag, only to find that there were little air holes in the bottom. I’ll leave the rest to your imagination. A new low !!

I went to an all night house party in my twenties where I'd had several different substances including LSD. I then had to get the coach home in the morning after no sleep at all. I spent the entire journey staring into the aisle still hallucinating and praying don't be sick don't be sick don't be sick.

My willpower lasted until we arrived and just as I walked off the coach, an enormous pile of colourful vomit threw itself out of me onto the pavement in front of a large group of families queuing on a sunny Sunday morning.

I don't even want to imagine what they must have thought of me.

I have a stoma so know something of these things, and I would go further. I think it’s not an excuse, it’s a valid reason. And it cracks me up that the poster replying thinks all you have to do is wear a pad and you’re sorted !!

My story doesn’t involve bodily fluids (or at least not directly) but it was the time in my life I felt least glamorous- having a baby in France and going to a very chic Parisian pharmacy to ask for maternity pads without knowing the French for maternity pads, sweaty, at 41 weeks, and the lady claiming to have no idea what that was because “women in France don’t need that”* and me being reduced to trying to mime, and then the lady offering a pack of incontinence pads with a pitying look.

• Turns out you get given a full supply in the hospital but at the time I took this to be a claim about the superior birthing abilities of French women being very chic and not making a mess.

Many years ago in bed with my then boyfriend, I hopped on top of him and assumed 69 position.
He yelped and threw me off him while shouting I had a turtles head sticking out of my arse.
I was mortified at the time, but I look back and laugh at the image of him with a dollop of shit on the end of his nose.

I don't think @MarmiteCoriander was trying to be awful or sanctimonious, more of a genuine question? If you don't suffer from bowel problems then I can imagine the assumption that a pad is a problem solver.
There's no need to be nasty towards her.

I share your embarrassment.
Even worse when you've just had a shower and got dressed so you're nice and fresh.....then have a coughing fit which results in a tsunami.
So you have to start all over again!

On my second date with my now husband I woke up covered in shit in his bed in Navy barracks.
I had to walk down a corridor to the shower block in the middle of the escorted by him.
Too nervous and too drunk not a great combo.

Horrendous pregnancy sickness - throwing up in a bush and it was so loud. Everyone was looking at me 😂

I posted earlier about a similar experience - had to puke into a Sainsbury’s bag in the car on the way home, only to find that the bag had those little air holes in the bottom !! I now know that Tesco is the way to go - every little helps !!

Recently on holiday in France. In the supermarket when stomach cramps hit out of nowhere. The supermarket toilet was in a dark shed outside. Got in just in time but there was zero toilet paper so I had to wash myself in the sink and put my trousers and knickers back on with a very wet bum and legs. Washed my hands and the sink as well as I could and then went back inside and told a member of staff that the toilet cubicle was very dirty when I tried to use it. So embarrassing 😭

If you don’t suffer from bowel problems you shouldn’t be offering out advice when you have no idea what you’re talking about, to be fair.

I was walking into my very large hospital to have scheduled endo surgery when I shat myself just 100yards from the door. I was wearing dark grey leggings so you could see it and I had to waddle through the busy concourse to find a loo. My husband was so kind bless him and went to get me wet wipes and pads. I rocked up to my surgery allready wearing pj bottoms.

Have ulcerative colitis, so have shat myself, shat in buckets, shat in woodland😞

@MarmiteCoriander sometime a pad wouldn't cut it btw, it's a fucking awful disease, maybe you should be less judgy🙄

In My Shoes: 24 Hours with Crohn’s or Colitis

I read somewhere that the reason someone puking makes others want to do it is connected with the noise of retching. Apparently Mother Nature designed it that way as a safety mechanism - if everyone in your group ate the same thing and it made someone sick, you could be next. There’s also something called empathy vomiting - your brain empathises with the sick person so much that you follow suit. So maybe next time make sure any onlookers are standing well away from you !!

I have peed my self far too many times to count. I had HG In pregnancy and it was a common occurrence to pee while retching so hard.

I have IBS and stupidly listened to my DH that most people can make it home and hold it when they need the toilet. So nearly at the end of my shopping trip in asda. Paid ran to the car, driving 5 mins home thought I was trumping…..nope.

Look up TravelJohn on Amazon, Ladies. They do wee bags and sick bags wih the gel crystals in and my car is never ithout ...

At my last smear test the nurse found that her extendable lamp thing wasn't working. So, she used the torch on her phone.
Just propped in up against my feet.

I shat myself two doors before my house.
I'd taken laxatives the night before and went out in the morning.Tried to rush home but nature took its course before I made it.Mortifying

@WFHbore2023 🤣

@StillMedusa

Even worse.. the cat WATCHED me with a WTF look on her face

To be fair you did desecrate it's litter box!!!

@BarbaraVineFan make sure your coil is still in place, a friend had this and ended up pregnant as hers had dislodged itself and fell out!