I am currently wearing one of DD's nappies as a makeshift sanitary pad...what's the most unglamorous moment of your life so far?!

[BarbaraVineFan]

I have been on the coil since 2020 and literally never had a period or anything approaching one. Randomly tonight I have come on my period and had nothing in the house :/ no friends locally enough to ask and DD asleep so couldn't go to a shop.. Hence the nappy trick (which feels a bit like wearing an entire roll of loo roll in my knickers!)

I think this might be a new low in the unglamorous stakes, even for me. Can anyone top this?!

Had one of the most shockingly horrendous hangovers of my life (think red wine, vodka, shots..) and had to travel back home (2.5hr) with DH and 2x DC in the car first thing the next morning (DH driving). We hit the M20/M26 junction and I starting projectile puking into a Tesco plastic bag. I then had to carry massive bag of puke home in the car for another 1.5hr👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻🤮

I can believe it. I don't think he was hiding it as such, just 'putting it to one side'. I can relate to that. ...and there's been deaths through dehydration/heart failure etc through excessive gaming.
I think this differs from OP as there's no shame.
Didn't Paula Radcliff do a sly poo once mid race

And how would this be at all possible? He was sitting opposite the person presumably? And somehow managed to shit into his hand and hold a pile of shit in his hand behind his back without the other player noticing that he was doing it?

Ohhhh god. Norovirus on holiday in a hotel. Puking every ten minutes, made worse when my other end joined in too. Sat on the loo, I then had to vomit all over myself instead as the sink was too far away. Took everything off, puked in the loo and simultaneously, uncontrollably, shat on the bath mat. The single worst time I’ve been sick in my life and the crushing shame at not being at home to deal with it haunts me now. I did my best, but I had to throw the bath mat away, that wasn’t going to get any better.

Slight variation on the theme...before having my first child, I was actually fairly glamorous with lovely long hair. During labour, I leaned forward and vomited copiously into my hair and stayed like this throughout. After my son was born I needed stitches because of a tear and I was asked if I was ok to have a team of medical students observe the procedure. I said it was fine and covered my face with my arms and sang to myself until it was all over!! There have been several further incidents since then too sadly!

You do all realise there are degenerate men wanking furiously to this, right?

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My periods were so heavy that I did use some unwanted nappies until they ran out. I didn’t need to worry for a few hours. Of course now they have period pants, I wish I had them, would have made life so much easier.

Many, many years ago I was at an outdoor concert, in a huge crowd. Some idiot flipped a cigarette butt, and it went down a slight gap in my bell-bottoms waist band (TOLD you many years ago). I shucked out of my pants in front of thousands of people. THANK GOD, I was wearing underwear!

Shit myself as a teenager on my way back home got the runs made it my front door but didn't manage the toilet🤣🤣. My dad was not impressed

Broke my leg, huge plaster on up to my thigh. First day home alone (DH at work, kids at school) I thought I'd have a shower downstairs instead of having to get up and downstairs to bathroom. Sat on the shower tray with leg out the cubicle- worked well- dried and popped towel on.

Realised I had no clean underwear/ clothes down with me, so had to go upstairs after all. I bum-shuffled up all our stairs, towel kept falling off: bollock naked with a heavy, plastered leg, sweating profusely from effort, I looked at my pasty, flabby, middle-aged body and wept by the time I got to our room. I promptly got into bed and didn't move all day!

A mate on way to mine didn't make it in time and literally peed in her driving seat. Lucky I have a carpet cleaner that can be used on car seats so we washed the seat but still some of it would of soaked right down. Bless her, sometimes there is just nowhere to stop and go.

I once got caught out and need the toilet, pulled into waitress but realised not gonna make it inside lucky spare spot near the back by trees ao pulled in and then went infront of my car. Wish I had time to pull up the bonnet to make it look like I was checking a problem bit ah well.

I had norovirus once and I was shitting watery concoction on the loo while having my head in a mixing bowl (only thing I could find) I was also pissing at the same time from the force of the vomiting. My DD who was 3 at the time kept asking was I ok 🤣🤣 bless her I threw the bowl away,

I agree. I the exact same problem and I also use a measuring jug . Once washed it is fine to use . Urine isn't poisonous.

I was thinking the same thing 🤔. Good Lord indeed!

Maybe go and do some research into what it’s like to live with conditions like Crohns and Colitis before shooting your mouth off. Or alternatively just keep your thoughts to yourself.

@Luredbyapomegranate as a fellow IBD UC warrior I feel for you.

Twice. Once on a long walk with BF, caught short so peed while he kept watch. Some fucker of a bastard came past ON A BIKE - FFS who rides a bike on a footpath. I have had time to hide from a walker. Tried to pull trousers up, could not stop peeing, pee everywhere. Of course trousers were the pale sort that showed every dark patch as... well, as a dark patch that looked suspiciously like a pee stain.

The other time was on a coach journey, way back when Noah was a lad. No toilets on the coach in those days and the driver refused to stop, claiming he'd run out of time on his tachograph if we stopped. I held out for FIVE HOURS. Then he stopped to let someone off and I got off and peed in the gutter in a side street in central London (fortunately it was dark) because by that time I was seriously worried for the health of my bladder.

I mean it isn’t poisonous but I just don’t really see the need for pissing in the kitchen items. Only on mumsnet does it seem to be normal behaviour to piss and shit everywhere possible then gleefully recount how you are regularly ‘caught short.’

And if you did enjoy pissing in measuring jugs it’s not too much of a stretch to buy a special piss jug.

I was heavily pregnant and staying with my inlaws and all of a sudden desperate for a pee. FIL in the bathroom for a significant amount of time so I grabbed one of toddlers nappies to pee in. Turns out thst products designed for infants don't hold the same volume as an adult sanitary product so in actual fact I just peed all over my hands and the floor.

Age 14 school ski trip. Got food poisoning on the slope, no toilet available. Inevitably shit myself. It took 6 hours to get back to the hotel, in which I had on my shitty sallopettes.

I had thrush and had got up with DS one Sunday morning. He then decided to be sick on my lap, so I had acid vomit all over my burning foof. It hurt but not so bad that it stopped me from laughing about the idiocy of the situation!

Omg that's hilarious! Sorry

I pissed in a nappy at center parcs in the changing rooms as I was on my own with a newborn and 2 year old and couldn't get to the toilets on time safely with all our stuff and both babies..

Have definitely used nappie as sanitary towel …really is effective 😅

Yeah it could at least have been a Waitrose one.

I recently had bad diarrhoea and had accidents when I fell to sleep, so I put one of my daughters adult nappies on for safety 😂