Annoying Mumsnet Phrases

[TheShellBeach]

Such as "Give my head a wobble" and "Holibobs", neither of which I have ever heard IRL.

Oh god, yes this.

I’m sure it’s a great programme, but it’s not the solution to every crap boyfriend. You can just dump them and date somebody else without doing months of online learning afterwards.

If I could just draw your attention to the “Dear Harry…” thread someone has posted.

😂😅 Yes, that is the most annoying thing ever! The whole thread!

Subjected to the male gaze

When a poster starts their post with SO.
So, I was in the toyshop today and Lewis Hamilton sped round the corner of the aisle in a pedal car......
And...
Oh bless you op.
Both make me clench my teeth till they threaten to shatter.

When people say ‘ I’m old’. Also ‘ a newborn’ when it should be a newborn baby or new baby

"LO" for baby is grim, too.
I once saw "L'il un" which was worse.

He's had his head turned
A tale as old as time

Haha hate both of those!

I hate it when a post starts with 'See..'

See, I don't look at things like that...
See, I would have done things differently...
See, I've something really interesting to say

For some reason I find it really patronising!

Oh I used to hate DTD too. I didn't stay in conception threads for long, because they were driving me crazy, although I bet it's mentally hard when you're trying for i.e. 12 months and no success, so I just cut them some slack. But I think these discussions can make you bit paranoid: symptom spotting, first response test 3 days after sex etc.

All the conception threads are a bit of a minefield.
It took me quite a while to figure out what all the acronyms meant.

Baby Dancing is the worst, though.

Baby dancing😂You don't imagine sex saying this. And what's wrong with word "sex"? Almost like getting pregnant was through immaculate conception.

I hate "had his head turned". It implies that the person in question had no part in the matter, it was some scheming woman that turned his head. It would be more accurate to say "he turned away from me". That would be putting the blame where it belongs.

"Unmumsnetty hugs"

Poster is aware that the OP needs some sympathy, but instead of just writing something sympathetic, they have to performatively demonstrate that they don't do the thing that they are currently doing!

Baby dust.
Aargh.

What's baby dust?

I hate baby dust too, but again...TTC makes you mad so I let it go.

You send or sprinkle baby dust to wish people luck in conceiving.

Thanks, Rene.

I've never heard of that, it sounds like superstition. You either become pregnant or you don't and it really is best not to discuss it with anyone unless you absolutely have to.

I haven't heard it outside of MN. People say things like "sending you baby dust" to wish people luck in conceiving. If that's superstition, so is any wish for good luck.

Haven’t read the full thread. If not already mentioned:
fast forward to and
you do you!
Arrgh!

Haven’t read the full thread

That's a really annoying Mumsnet phrase.

Daily mail is a bag of shit and you do not have my permission to use this post

They don't need permission and that sentence means nothing lol

‘Eh?’

Staggeringly rude and also disingenuous; it’s always clear that the poster knows exactly what was meant.

Also: I just can’t get on with….[insert normal reasonable behaviour, hobby or product that is usually astonishing straightforward]

Such a stupid phrase.