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Is anyone awake? I’m expecting bad news and I can’t sleep

1000 replies

MyCake · 13/12/2022 04:32

My dh is unwell and we have no idea what is wrong. We are getting scan results this morning but they were only to rule things out so probably not conclusive. However, I can’t see how this isn’t going to be something serious as he has declined so rapidly.

I feel sick. We’ve already lost most of his income through him being off work so I’m also worried sick about money. We have enough savings to manage another 2 months at the most.

My dc are already suffering, despite them
mot fully understanding how serious the symptoms are, as dh is pretty much housebound and I can’t physically drive them to all the clubs and places they need to go by myself.
I also work full time although thankfully I’m a teacher and break up this week.

My heart is broken just looking at him disappearing in front of me. The doctors are slow to take his symptoms seriously so sadly by the time he was sent to hospital he was already unable to work and very ill. It could of course be something very treatable but at the moment I feel suffocated with the fear of the worst case scenarios.
I am writing this as I’m lonely and scared and wondered if anyone is awake to say hello.

I have name changed in case anyone recognises me from this post. If you do, please don’t mention this as I am doing a great job of appearing strong on the outside.

OP posts:
SaltyPopcornIcecream · 13/12/2022 12:20

Sending positive wishes for good news today ❤

Floralnomad · 13/12/2022 12:21

@MyCake if you tell us what your husbands symptoms are someone may be able to recognise them . I was I’ll for 6 months , more or less chair bound and had 2 very near death experiences before being diagnosed with something that is very manageable on a daily basis .

Zonder · 13/12/2022 12:29

Hoping for good news for you.

PinkyFlamingo · 13/12/2022 12:35

Thinking of you and your family this morning.

OnlyFannys · 13/12/2022 12:40

Hoping that no news over the past few weeks means it's not bad news x

whatausername · 13/12/2022 12:48

MyCake · 13/12/2022 05:18

@Netaporter writing a list of worries is a good idea. I remember I used to do that when I was younger and it helped a lot. Thank you.

My post is not helpful but I clicked on "see all" so I could avoid reading every single reply. The post I've quoted was very helpful guidance for me. I've had a morning where I feel so incompetant and incapable and all my problems feel so huge. You and the PP have reminded me how beneficial I found it when I was younger to list my worries, add solutions and strike off those over which I'd no control (albeit with the odd contingency plan maybe noted first). I'm going to go away and do that now. It is strange how we find help and guidance when we are least expecting it.

I am sorry that you have so much uncertainty and fear right now. I hope you get answers and a plan soon, and I pray it isn't terrible news. Don't be afraid to explain to your/your DH's doctor or nurse the emotional strain you are facing. I see that you feel let down by how long things have taken but not every doctor and nurse is the same and most of them do care. Quite frankly, the work wouldn't be worth the trouble if they didn't. Good luck OP

uncomfortablydumb53 · 13/12/2022 12:50

Holding you hand and sending strength
The waiting for results is the worst isn't it
Take it an hour at a time.
It might help to brainstorm your thoughts on paper to get them out of your mind for a moment
Hoping for good news

blackheartsgirl · 13/12/2022 12:53

Hand hold here too.

I’ve been there, the wait is awful. Hope you hear soon

LesLavandes · 13/12/2022 12:54
Flowers
saturnisturning · 13/12/2022 13:03

Hope you’re all ok, OP.

hand hold for you xx

CheeseIsMyPatronus · 13/12/2022 13:07

Thinking of you, OP. Hope the news is encouraging.

Ahwelltoobad · 13/12/2022 13:09

Big hugs, hoping for the best, and I'm sure you'll have a whole community step up to help you if need be. Sometimes those you least expect to. Much love to you and your family!

spiderlight · 13/12/2022 13:09

Holding your hand. I hope you have better news than you're expecting.

OldFan · 13/12/2022 13:10

Praying for you that it's something that can be treated. It could be all sorts of things. xx

Peggingsoundsgross · 13/12/2022 13:25

Hope youre ok op 🙏

TheShellBeach · 13/12/2022 13:29

So sorry to read this, OP. I do hope the news isn't as bad as you fear.

Sending you love and strength.

Middledazedted · 13/12/2022 13:39

Hoping something very treatable is found.

caringcarer · 13/12/2022 14:05

I hope you have some support in real life. Such a scary time for you and your children. I hope your DH gets good news and it is something fixable.

NinjaGin · 13/12/2022 14:05

Fingers crossed for you and your DH that the news is better than you think it might be xx

Mummyoflittledragon · 13/12/2022 14:10

I hope you get to the bottom of this soon and your dh can get better soon.

Excusemegreentea · 13/12/2022 14:17

Sending positive wishes your way

Hotpinkangel19 · 13/12/2022 14:25

Hoping it's not terrible news, and can be something that is fixed for him

Chocolateismyfavourite · 13/12/2022 15:17

Thinking of you

justasking111 · 13/12/2022 15:35

I would email your GP surgery be honest with them tell them you haven't had the results of the scan but three weeks on you think your husband may be dying and you're all frightened.

momtoboys · 13/12/2022 16:04

I'm so sorry you are going through all of this. I can understand the worry must be crushing. You will both be in my thoughts today.

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