Facebook phrases that drive you mad!

[Butterscotchpudding]

I'll start...

"My heart is full". Really? You just had a good gym session!

Excessive posting of FB Memories. I have a friend who used to post photos of her aged dog constantly, complete with mundane details of its diabetes blood sugar levels and every tweak of its drug regime. The dog eventually expired, and I thought that would be the end of it. No. She is now posting it all over again, every single FB memory of the dog that comes up for her is reposted, so that we can relive the fascinating accounts of vet trips and insulin shots.

"I'm not crying, you are" really annoys me for some reason.

Those posts asking you to copy and paste something to your wall and share to raise awareness of something accompanied by something like “I think I know which of my friends will do this”. Those posts have a whiff of emotional blackmail about them!

Ones which contain 56 holiday snaps.
Ones which start, Wow and then proceed to something banal.

Ones which contain 56 holiday snaps

Oh I like those! I like to see different places around the world, and my friends/family enjoying themselves. But not if it’s just 56 photos of the same two children splashing in a generic swimming pool. Then I’m right with you.

I know there are some very contentious threads about this, but I hate the Facebook posts of 'Today we've made the heartbreaking decision to rehome..' followed by the name and photo of the pet they acquired a few months earlier, along with a list of totally foreseeable and normal problems which they dress up as excuses to get rid.

These enrage me and I always want to comment "Is it the really bored and gullible ones?"

Parsnip legged gimp is a great phrase!

Yes to all of these!

But a new-ish one I’ve seen is regarding birthday's, either their own or their child usually, where say they’ve just turned 25, and they write ‘here’s to/ looking forward to chapter 25!’ No, you’ve just completed 25 years of being alive, this is now chapter 26! I’ve not seen a single person write that correctly!

I cannot believe I forgot this one as it is annoys me the most.

On a Facebook group, usually an area one.

Someone asks for a recommendation for e.g:

Recommend me the best pizza place/curry house/kids party venue

Cue 30 answers and 29 of those are of the same place. And people continue with the same answers unless the poster turns of the replies. I too like X pizza place but once it has been recommend 5 times you get the idea so no need keeping repeating it .

I hate the vague booking statuses which are always intended for a handful of close real life friends but seen by all 200 of their facebook friends. Stuff which is clearly an inside joke and screaming out for a "but what do you mean?" reply (but I don't want to give them the satisfaction) -

New one I have seen on Instagram, #corememory usually accompanied by pumpkin picking photos...

“Share this post and type ‘done’ to win a week at Centre Parcs” from a Facebook page that was set the day before.
Cue hundreds of ‘Done - my goldfish has been really sick so I could use this break”

🤣🤣🤣

Yes to this! And the endless posts giving away RVs or landrovers (yeah right), often won already by someone who was 17 and couldn't take the prize, so they have to rerun the "competition". When I see my friends sharing these ridiculous posts I wonder how I know such silly people.

Ugh yessss! I’m in a Buffy group and the same questions keep coming up which is irritating but understandable as there are always lots of new members who won’t have seen past posts, but the question will get answered and then people just keep answering it! It would be one thing if it was more of an opinion post with some debate going altho that still gets repetitive, but when it’s a question with a definite answer and it’s been answered…no one else needs to chime in!

I have an acquaintance who constantly posts variations of '[heart emoji]my amazing friend Claire'/'Thank you Claire for always being there for me' etc followed by a photo of a present/flowers etc. This is clearly intended to make other fb friends think perhaps they should be sending her presents, wonder what the occasion is etc. Surely if she wanted to thank Claire, or tell her how much she loved her she could phone/text her?

It also irritates me when another friend repeatedly posts 'This could only happen to [child's name]!!!!! with a photo of a child with chocolate on their face/muddy trousers/odd socks or something similarly mundane

highly evocative image

God yes all the phishing posts and people still reply! Then 2 days later it's "I've been hacked don't accept a request from me"

Surely nobody still does that ... really? That's so old!

@Wheredoallthepensgo I mainly see it on Instagram to be fair but yeah I do see it on fb from time to time. If you are gonna post a shameless selfie just do it without that ridiculous tag line!

Posting timehops. The same ones year after year.

I can’t believe it’s been 5 years!
I can’t believe it’s been 6 years!
Still love this photo! 7 years!

What is it supposed to mean?

Posts that have a picture of a cocktail with either " having a cheeky..." or " it would be rude not to..."

Pictures of a " gourmet buffet" which is basically a load of packets opened and chucked on plates. Yes we all do that but it doesn't really require a round of applause!

Weekly photos of a baby holding a sign saying " 1 week, 2 weeks, 1 month, 2 months etc" on and on for years...

Pictures of a baby with the face hidden ( and no not safeguarding issue...) If you don't want your baby on Social Media then don't post bloody photos of them!

Any posts with the words bubba, mumma or hubby

Location posts from a garden centre cafe saying"out with mummy" Why do they think anyone is remotely interested?

People who post " safe" after some sort of disaster when they haven't been within 50 miles of where it happened.

Pictures of feet on a sun lounger on holiday.

‘Fly high’ irritates me about people who have died. Mainly when they aren’t talking about a relative.