If you were at SAHM and the kids now go to school....

[SleepingStandingUp]

What are you?

My youngest go to school January, and I'm just thinking when people do the "so what do you do?" question, can I reasonably say SAHM without looking like I'm taking the p given they'll be in school 9-3 five days a week?

Lady of leisure? Ha I wish
Student? I'm only studying part time so doesn't seem reasonable
Economically inactive? Well I like to SPEND it!!

So do I just say "nothing, sent the kids to school, don't have a job"

I’d describe you as a SAHM and student.

unemployed

Im still a sahm.

I suppose traditionally your a housewife

I either say I'm not working at the moment or I've retired early depending on who I'm talking to!

I say I'm a stay at home mum. Because I am! I do the house stuff during the day, I do school pick ups (DH does drop off). I cook the evening meal, I make packed lunches, I do all the life admin, I make appointments and ferry kids to clubs. Being a SAHM is a valid choice! In your situation, I'd say I was studying part time around the kids. Just be factual- anyone who wants to judge can judge in my opinion, I have a lot that I fill my time with, and yes some of that is hobbies, but that's the bonus of being at home!

You are not unemployed. The correct term is ‘economically inactive’ when you are not looking for work, as defined by the government a few months ago.

In your case you are also a student so call yourself whatever you wish, it’s no one else’s business!

Nobody where I live (Northumberland ), would even use the term SAHM, nor feel they need to query/justify it.

I went back to work after 7 years (teaching) and now I dream of being a SAHM.

Only half joking. I love my job but have a messy upside down chaotic house

Part time student. Loads of people with kids that age do part time work.

and SAHM is a valid choice. The ones I know do loads of volunteering in the school (helping with garden/taking kids swimming) and help with elderly relatives/local community, also committees for clubs etc. Someone needs to have the time to do this stuff!

You're overthinking it imo. Only my eldest is at school but I say sahm/student/lily of the field depending on who I'm talking to (and technically I have a job).

What would you prefer? SAHM or student are factually correct. Lady of leisure if you like.

I guess when people ask the question they're trying to have a conversation so do you want the next question to be about your kids, your studies or something else?

Oh I get this question all the time! People seem to find it very hard to accept that I made a choice to stay at home and not look for a job but it works for us. I feel very lucky I had the option and I tell them so!

carer. both dc arre disabled so need a lot of extra support.

I either say “oh I don’t work” or I say “I’m retired” and then if they laugh and push further on the retired statement I say “well I took maternity leave but it because eternity leave!”

dh is high earner so financially I don’t need to work and we decided that it was better all round to have a parent at home doing all the jobs at home/bills/kids social lives/etc etc.

Yawn - here we go again

"I'm so lucky to be able to not work"
"I can't imagine being a housewife"

.... and on it goes, over and over again.

*Yawn - here we go again

"I'm so lucky to be able to not work"
"I can't imagine being a housewife"

.... and on it goes, over and over again.*

This^^
These types of conversations are soo pointless !!

^ I've been here over 20 years and it never changes .

Unemployed

My dc are not now all at school, they've all actually left school!

I'm a pt student and have a neurological disability which leaves me pretty tired. My dh works long hours as a GP and I don't want him coming home and having to do all the housework too! So we have cleaners once a week and I do the rest in wee spurts, especially cooking.

It's amazing how few people ask what you do when you're sitting in a wheelchair though!

Tbf I'd say I'm at home with the children rather than I'm a stay at home Mom

I thought officially I had to want a job to be unemployed.

Yes true, I'll still be doing all that.

I am, I think it just feels odd after 7.5 years to think my primary purpose of the day isn't actual childcare. Eldest has medical issues so I still have hospital visits and who knows how they'll take to nursery. They might not last!

I say I'm a stay at home mum. Because I am! I do the house stuff during the day, I do school pick ups (DH does drop off). I cook the evening meal, I make packed lunches, I do all the life admin, I make appointments and ferry kids to clubs. Being a SAHM is a valid choice!

up to you what you do but I am a mum and a single one and do all of that with a full time job. So stay at home all you want but don’t pretend it’s a job choice. In answer to the original question I would say ‘I don’t work’. Being a mum hasn’t got much to do with it has it?

Well I didn't ask for either of your options specifically so feel free to not both with the tedious chat