Terrible gifts for a middle aged, or older, woman.

[Aixellency]

Can we make a list?

I’ll start: (This is adult to adult gifts - no judgment regarding presents from children!)

Afternoon tea. Just - why? Not that I don’t like cake and afternoon G&T - but this suggestion is always wheeled out as such a treat, as if one is suddenly too old to get dressed up for a night out.

Mug with a single ‘posh’ teabag. In fact, anything someone else thinks I’ll consider posh - I’m middle aged, I’ve done posh.

Anything at all from Etsy or Not on The High Street. Anything craft-y or home made, unless specifically requested.

Anything ‘safe’ or ‘nice’.

(Please, just stick to Islay single malt, Hermes nail polish, and newly published volumes of art, cookery, fiction or poetry. Thank you.)

Im middle aged and i dream of a posh afternoon tea

The stuff you like op i wouldn't thank you for

Vive la difference

God, some people!

@AnnaMagnani Love Rameau, but I’m more of a 21st century person. Saw six things in erm … southern France this Summer (partly a birthday present to self) and came away mildly frustrated. Though the Castellucci Resurrection was horribly true to life right now.

Candles. I really dislike them. I do however like nice perfume or shower stuff. I also dislike body lotion or handcream.

Would love to go to Aix!

DH and I have discovered that bitching about disappointing opera is practically as good as enjoying a great opera.

Candles.
Toiletries of any kind.
Aroma diffuser or similar.
Gin.
Chocolate with alcohol in.
Stuff I'm expected to keep on display.

However, I'm quite happy to receive practical items as gifts - new towels, bed sheets etc. Unless it my mum giving me a pair of tweezers or kitchen tongs, which she has given me 3278 times already (& they're always really rubbish quality!!).

I was in marks and spencer cafe once and there was a very elderly lady I would guess 80 at least sat at a table having afternoon tea with one of those tiered cake stands, she was accompanied by a little girl who looked to be about 4.
It very much looked like someone's birthday treat and they both looked really happy.

I really like Ghostbusters so over the years people have bought me Ghostbusters toys - kids toys. In my lounge at the moment is a 4ft stay puft marshmallow man that a friend decided to randomly gift me. I have pop vinyls too. Slimer earrings... (I don't have pierced ears)

I hate them all. I like dressing up in Ghostbusters cosplay yeah! But I have a house full of shite I never wanted or asked for 😭

I love beer, but get given pink gin or Prosecco!
Fathers day gifts are always beer related, Mother’s Day are pink fluffy gin shite!

Saying this though. I miss my grans pile of crap she’d get us every year.ringtons anyone…damart.first real confirmation of her Alzheimer’s was no shit gifts.

I think it is a little ageist to think women of a certain age are a homogenous group.
Just as there is no one gift that will please a 25 year old, there are none for a 60 year old woman.
We don't all start melting into some wrinkly mass and agree what a good gift is.
I am not into stuff generally and would be bored stiff at an afternoon tea.
I much prefer inexpensive items that are thoughtful.

I’m really bloody fussy over my mugs though.right size, rim width, handle hold,inner shape. A cup of tea is sacred it needs a holder of perfection. And Christmas mugs are handy for this sometimes as they are massive,to include gifts to put inside.

I have never been disappointed by a bottle of Remy Martin.

Otherwise, if asked I say a donation to the food bank or an Amazon voucher. Then I can top up if I need anything or use it for something random when the mood takes me!

Have PM’d you - I think!

This is simply not true. I have never had my nails done in a salon (apart from the odd pedicure). I do them myself. Basecoat, two coats of colour, top coat. Lasts two weeks, no chips. Nail varnish is my favourite present. Can't get enough of it. Off to look at Hermes polish now.

I remembered another favourite present. Good quality flowers. But they have to be lillies or white/cream roses with proper greenery like fern or eucalyptus. Not that babysbreath shite . I don't mind peach or pink either and usually buy myself a bunch every week anyway. My huband always knows to buy me the nice ones now. Don't buy be the tacky coloured ones that look fake. They usually go in the bin.

I love Chanel Allure and Joe Malone hand wash. Don't buy me any other perfume. I also love Clarins hand cream and a really nice toiletry bag and slippers. But they have to be good quality.

I think I have just written my wish list for Christmas ;)

Yep!

Especially if the body lotions sets are that awful Bayliss and Harding stuff. It always brings me out in a rash, so it goes from under the tree straight into the next church fair or charity shop.

Don't buy be the tacky coloured ones that look fake

Agree @Snuggleworm - and I don't like mixed colour bunches either - all one shade, thank you.

Peach is my favourite, followed by cream or white, and then yellow. Not a great lover of pink or red roses but they'll do at a pinch..

That’s kind of the point of the thread, speakout! Of course there’s no homogenous group. But there’ll be a million threads between now and Christmas suggesting otherwise.

No more ornaments please!

Another one here who likes the sound of @Aixellency

This thread has reminded me of all the scarves people (including me) used to give my late MIL because she “loved scarves” and then when we were sorting out her things after she died she turned out to have over 300 of them, half not even unpacked 😭

As you reach middle age (I'm 55) you've often accumulated a lot of stuff, for that reason I prefer gifts that are consumables: Bottles of champagne, Speciality gins, exotic liquors, single malts, good brandy & cognac, and nice bottles of wine make superb presents. Even a bottle of Baileys or Port is nice.

Food hampers are also extremely welcomed. Restaurant vouchers and being taken for meals out are also great. Weekends away. Spa days. All good.

I loathe kitsch ornaments like Lladró and dubious smelling soaps which I suspect were unwanted presents; annoying feminist books about empowering women; items of clothing including neck scarves (far too personal and often ill fitting); the current trend for ridiculously oversized candles; anything knitted; house crap bought from TKMAXX and home sense, etc. Horrendous Amateur art. People who give you framed photos of events.

I'm often asked my family members what I'd like and I often reply with exotic coffee beans (can be bought online or fortnum and mason have a wonderful selection). Port & Cheese sets are nice.

Anything I can put in my mouth or drink is more than welcome.

Alcohol or chocolate. I’m middle-aged! I’m trying to lose weight and have told all of my friends this! So why they keep giving me chocolates and booze?!

Candles or ‘smelly stuff’ like body lotions. It was kinda cool when I was fourteen. That was thirty years ago. Bored of it now! Every year 🙄

From older relatives: Figure hugging clothes that would have suited me when I was twenty and my boobs were bigger than my belly.

A voucher. Can’t be arsed to find a good present? Then give cash. Not a piece of paper that you think is thoughtful but means I have to go do the shopping you couldn’t be bothered to do, at a place of your choice within a time limit of your choice.

For good presents for me, try Seasalt or Whitestuff. Or a gardening centre.

Or give me your time. Instead of a voucher for afternoon tea / spa, tell me that you miss me and would love to take me out, and ask when I’m free and where I’d like to go. Which will be the theatre, because I’m a grown up now.

One of those mugs with hot chocolate stuck in the top and wrapped up artfully. I don't.like hot chocolate. It's just a filler safe present Dm always gets me.

Also wine. A bottle of wine for DH and me for Xmas from my nan. DM will have told her to "just get that for them". I don't drink, DH doesn't drink. They both know this, very much aware we don't drink. Yet it's a running joke every year we'll get a bottle of wine. My brother gets a box of chocolates. Wtf 😂

Anything featuring a llama.