At what age did your children become responsible for their own laundry?

[WhoWants2Know]

My kids are 14 and almost 13. Up until now, I have washed and dried all the clothes, folded them and put them on a separate shelf for each child to put away. Which they forget. Until I remind them, then nag them, and eventually lose my temper and shout about it.

This summer, the piles have grown, and the kids dig through them and drag everything about. Then they can't find their clothes and get angry at me because they can't find what they want to wear. (Which is generally exactly where I said it would be.)

After the millionth argument about "me losing their clothes" when it's my responsibility to do the laundry, I decided I didn't want to do all the work and also be yelled at for it. So I gave them each a laundry basket and a peg hanger for their small bits to dry on.

They feel like I'm being mean and making life difficult, but is it really that much to ask of teens? I asked at work and one of my colleagues said her 20 something child still brings laundry home for her to wash!

I know on here most people expect their 5 year olds to be doing their own washing but I don't see how that can possiblly be cost efficient or workable

I can't work out the logistics, surely you'd run out of say school shirtsbefore child A had enough for a full white load (just an example obviously I know not all school shirts are white). Wouldnt you end up spending a fortune on half full washes?

My 8 year old brings her basket down, my husband washes and dries it, then she takes it up and puts it away.

I do the washing for my teens (eldest is 16). They're responsible for putting their dirty clothes in the washing basket and putting away their clean clothes (I take the piles of clean clothes upstairs and dump them on their beds).

I never understood this why should people in one household should be doing their laundry separately - what a waste of resources.
I dont understand why is it so common in the UK for mother to do all the laundry herself. Surely children can be raised to be part of that process - hanging it out to dry, bring it in, fold it, iron if necessary.

What you describe happening must be exhausting.

While it's important to get children to be responsible for their laundry, it's not reasonable to do their own individual loads. At a young age they can check pockets and put it in the washing basket. As they get older they can fold , sort , put away. If they don't they run out of clean stuff....simple!

My children were about 13/14 too. I was trying to work full time, run the home full time and do all the laundry, the children's father (now my ex) did nothing either.

I finally snapped and said they all had to learn to use the washing machine, the tumble dryer and an iron. I bought everyone a laundry basket, a packet of washing powder and some fabric softener to start them off. Printed out instructions for everyone, gave them a date after which I would not be responsible for any laundry except my own.

The shock was huge, and I'm sure lots of people will say 'how cruel' I was. But amazingly, after a couple of weeks of lost socks, no clothes to wear etc., they managed to sort it out for themselves. My (then) husband was particularly miffed, but couldn't seem to give an answer as to why laundry should only be "my" job and nobody else's, or why a grown man couldn't operate a washing machine.

I felt awful doing it at the time, but looking back, I would do the same again. And both my children grew up perfectly able to sort out their own laundry. Can't say the same for the ex, he remarried some other mug to do his housework.....

I wash for my 16 year old but training her to bring down dirty things and put away clean stuff! My mum still washes my things when I go and stay with my parents! 😂

Age 11.

Whenever this subject comes up people always talk about it not being efficient and only running machines half full. That never happens. If someone doesn't have enough whites for a full load they either ask the rest of the family if they have anything, or they fill the load with towels or sheets.

I am convinced it is more efficient because when I did everybody's stuff would go through the laundry without ever being worn, when they do their own it happens less.

My DC is 9 and will put dirty clothes in the washing machine after being prompted but that’s about it. I do the laundry for the family as other children are even younger. I’ll dry it and fold it then put it where it all needs to go. I’m actually okay with doing this for now.

Also can't justify the cost and inefficiency of everyone doing separate loads. Everyone puts in central basket, washed in white/coloured/darks etc, returned to bedrooms fr them to put away.
If you want to teach a bit more responsibility then why not have turn taking week each to be in charge of this process

I did all the household laundry until my girls left for uni, so they were 18.
But from teenagers they were responsible for putting laundry in the basket, or it didn't get washed, and would hang it out/bring it in when asked and put their own clean stuff away.

Mine are 17, 15 and 12. They have been expected to bring full laundry baskets down and 15 and 17 year old are fully capable of putting on a wash. I usually do it for them but 17yo will do her own if she has a full load or there's other stuff around. 15yo is starting to.

Hanging out and bringing in washing is everyone's job. They iron their own school shirts from year 8 and 17yo does most of her own ironing. They all put clothes away and have done since quite small.
Washing is not my job alone but neither is it their jobs alone. Everyone helps out and is a team (including DH).

agree with that!

10 in our house.

DS1 is 13 and for about a year he has been doing his own laundry, I always remind him to check the other laundry baskets for darks/lights to make up a full load. He's v good at it and hangs it all up to dry as well - more diligently than me . He hangs it away neatly in his wardrobe afterwards too

If I only had one DC I would be very smug however DS2 (10) leaves a trail of destruction and dirty clothes wherever he goes and getting him to put dirty clothes in the laundry basket is a battle most days - he in theory knows how to use the washing machine but would much prefer to wear filthy clothes than actually contemplate using it

There not …
23 year old kind of is as she lives abroad and I presume she actually washes her clothes but when she pops in she thinks this is a laundrettes.
16, 12 and 11 year old still can’t work out the whites go in the whites and coloureds in colouredS Baskets.
there is no way I’m letting them actually put it in the machine 🤦‍♀️
i await the perfect mothers pointing out what a shit mother I am !

We have never done separate laundry.

We all put our dirty clothes into a centra laundry basket, which divides light and darks.

From being a teen dd would sometimes put a wash load in on, from the laundry basket. Usually me or dh though. One of us will hand it in an airier to dry in the utility room, or,out things like towels into the tumble dryer.

Dh does all of our ironing.

All clothes when dry and/or ironed is put into other laundry baskets to go upstairs, one for each room. Dh has put her own clothes away since being a young teen. Dh and I do the basket for our room.

Dd is now at university so does her own laundry there, but we revert back to the old norm when she returns in holidays. She generally doesn't do her own bedding whilst away simply as the washing machine isn't very big, so it comes home to be washed. If we are visiting we take clean bedding to switch it with.

I am wary of the cost of everyone trying to do separate loads, and that's my main hesitation. I think I will still have to do everyone's whites to make up a full load.

But I am willing to bet they'll let the rest build up until they have more than enough for a full load.

With only 3 of us in the house, when dd is home, it definitely wouldn't be very efficient for us to each do a light and a dark wash each week, as well as towels and bedding on top of that. We also just don't have the time for that many loads as we are at work during the week, and have no intention of doing laundry in an evening unless we are desperate!

Everyone expected to help with folding and putting away, no matter how young. Dh irons his own shirts. Nothing else gets ironed.

Dd took over doing all her own at about 13 because it suited her to do so. I get grumpy when she leaves it too late and needs to use the tumble instead of line drying.

Ds is 14 and looking highly unlikely to start wanting to wash his weekly underpant and t-shirt himself any time soon.

I'll do it for the family as long as everyone makes it easy; all dirty laundry into the futility room by Friday evening. Whoever is in earshot move the next load along. No complaining about missing football kit if you chuck it damp onto the bathroom floor and forget to tell anyone you need it before Saturday.

My dd was about 16

I went away and she started doing the laundry. Though mine is folded not ironed and I do
other chores

Mine are 6 and 7 and will get either darks or lights from their own hampers and put it in my basket when I tell them I am collecting laundry. I'll do the machine and drying, and then when sorting I divide it up into piles, they come and collect from my room and they put the pjs, underwear and more casual, foldable things away themselves in their drawers. I'll hang their nicer stuff and uniform in wardrobes because they can't reach yet and I want certain things hung nicely. I started doing this with them along with some other basic kitchen tidying jobs last summer, I wanted them to understand early on there isn't a housework fairy who will continually pick up and put away like my ex H used to expect!

Mine was 16 I think- left it until everything was dirty, bedroom stank of unwashed teen clothes. It was grim. I have a feeling he still does that to an extent

This. Washing separately would inefficient. I ask for help to hanging and picking up sometimes.

*for hanging and picking...