At what age did your children become responsible for their own laundry?

[WhoWants2Know]

My kids are 14 and almost 13. Up until now, I have washed and dried all the clothes, folded them and put them on a separate shelf for each child to put away. Which they forget. Until I remind them, then nag them, and eventually lose my temper and shout about it.

This summer, the piles have grown, and the kids dig through them and drag everything about. Then they can't find their clothes and get angry at me because they can't find what they want to wear. (Which is generally exactly where I said it would be.)

After the millionth argument about "me losing their clothes" when it's my responsibility to do the laundry, I decided I didn't want to do all the work and also be yelled at for it. So I gave them each a laundry basket and a peg hanger for their small bits to dry on.

They feel like I'm being mean and making life difficult, but is it really that much to ask of teens? I asked at work and one of my colleagues said her 20 something child still brings laundry home for her to wash!

Since toddlers they have had to put their clothes in the laundry basket. Since they both play sport they now come in and it goes straight in the washing machine. I take laundry basket down and put on a wash. Once washed and sometimes ironed (school shirts) ds2 since toddlerhood has to pair socks then he has to take the 4 piles to the respective bedrooms. Easy. I do a wash as soon as there's enough.

I remember my mum did all the laundry until I left for uni, but it didn't mean I was incapable or didn't know how to do it, it was just the most sensible way.
All our clothes get put in one laundry basket, I sort it through, wash, dry, iron and put away. Eldest is only 7 (and can't reach the wardrobe), as they get older they can put their own clothes away. I will continue to wash it all as there wouldn't be enough for separate loads - a waste of water, electric and washing powder!
I really don't understand why people are so desperate to make their children so much so young. Let them be children, not mini adults!

I have a 14 year old, I don't see the point in making them do separate loads of washing. There's only the 2 of us so it would be wasteful.

DC is responsible for putting their own clothes in the laundry, I'll put everything in the wash and dry it, DC responsible for ironing/putting away their own clothes.

Just being responsible for your own washing is far less exhausting than doing it for everyone!
That argument makes less sense than it being inefficient.

And why is it a faff? Just wash your own clothes when you have a full load. It's literally that simple.

I really don't understand why people are so desperate to make their children so much so young. Let them be children, not mini adults

They're not washing clothes by hand down at the river 😂😂 it's hardly an onerous chore if you're only doing it for one person.
My DS does chores to earn pocket money - it's teaching him responsibility and the meaning of money.

He still gets plenty of time to be a child.

Again, it's doesn't mean additional loads. It's the same amount of washing just done separately.
We each have a laundry basket. When that gets full you pop it in the machine. Simple.

God are people still arguing the toss of this after 3 days?!!

I'm finding it amusing tbh.
Laundry threads are a perfect example of how people have become incapable of seeing things from a different perspective.
It's bizarre! 😂

You folk who encourage laundry to be in loads by person 'when the basket is full', do you not separate the colours? fabrics? How does that work?

Equally, so does doing a little ad that contains everyone's laundry.
Machine goes on once, everyone's laundry done in one load
Simple.

Little ad? Load! Not little ad!

My DC have to put their laundry in the communal basket or it doesn't get washed, and do their own ironing if needed and put it away, but I do the sorting and washing.

If they need an emergency load doing - because they are going away or didn't put stuff in the basket - they do it themselves.

I manage to get through all the laundry for a family of 4 with 4 loads a week with my system, 5 if we have guests and there are extra sheets & towels to wash.

Both at Uni now. One manages his own washing perfectly well when away, the other less so but still has to follow my rules when he brings the washing home with him!

From 16 mins did their own. Prior they had to take their washing up once it was dry

We just all muck in and help with any jobs that need doing. When the kids were little, they'd help bring laundry to the machine, and pass it for me/DH to peg up... gradually they did more. Now when they are back from uni they ask "you got any white stuff to go in the wash? I'm doing a load later, put it by the machine" just like we used to ask them.
Set expectations high from early days.

Equally, so does doing a little ad that contains everyone's laundry.
Machine goes on once, everyone's laundry done in one load
Simple.

That's what I mean, neither way is more efficient because it's the same amount of washing 🤷🏼‍♀️

I wear mostly darks as does DS so it all goes in together. I have a zip up net for any delicates or underwear.

Dh has more whites so on the odd occasion I have anything white I just pop it in with his shirts.

I read this as 16 minutes and I thought we'd reached peak MN over achievement when babies under an hour old were sorting out their own laundry! 🤣🤣

No because think about it.
Say, I do my own load of laundry.
Then child one does theirs.
Then child two does theirs.
That's three loads of laundry, so the machine goes on three times plus three lots of detergent and electric.
Where as I put all three in together, so that's one lot of everything.

dancingbudgie have you missed the bit where I said we only put full loads on?

It's the same amount of clothes using the machine the machine same amount of time. It's just not mixed loads.

Putting everyone's in together doesn't mean you wear fewer clothes 😂

Yes, i missed that bit. Apologies.

No worries

Teenagers are perfectly capable of doing their own laundry. Not only are you being reasonable, you are teaching them responsibility.

One of the best hacks my family has used for generations: Weaponized incompetence. Parent continually misplaces or "accidentally" damages favorite clothing to the point the child will INSIST on doing their own laundry. So yeah, my siblings and I, our kids, started doing laundry at about the age we started to care about our appearance.

If the problem is the putting away I'd not do the shelves but just dump it on their bed once it's dry.

But then it gets swept off the bed, onto to floordrobe, then into the laundry basket... without even being worn.

14 has now washed and hung her first load of laundry. She moaned that she was as tired and it was a piss take.

I said that having me do all the laundry and her shouting when she can't find an outfit that she hasn't put away, felt to me like taking the piss.

For reference, it was a full load. 12 also did her washing without any issues.

Also, I don't know if it makes a difference, but I am a single parent. I work full time and have an hour commute at the end of the working day. So I'm tired too. I don't know how long I will carry on with this way of doing things. But at the very least, both kids will understand that the laundry involves time and effort and doesn't just magically sort itself.