What makes a women look frumpy

[Wherecanitbe]

I am considering an overhaul of what I wear and my hairstyle. I am feeling a bit down and frumpy at the moment so thought this would be a positive change.

My overhaul is not going to be a drastic change , I cannot afford to purchase a whole new wardrobe of clothes,shoes and accessories. So please could you give me your items of clothing and / or hairstyles that in your opinion makes a women look frumpy.

This post is not meant to be offensive in anyway, I believe a person should wear whatever they wish regardless of whether another person thinks it's frumpy.

Oooh, but what colour fig leaf?
Not a frumpy shade one hopes!

Unless they lose their hair, when they're accused of looking like thugs or described in terms of 'I couldn't stand it if my man shaved his hair off, he has lovely hair'. As if they can do anything about it.

I don’t think it’s specific clothing that looks grumpy but to me it’s more a specific style! I think you can wear cardigans and look great. You can wear long T-shirts and look great, but for example if you wear them with dated trouser cuts then you’ll look frumpalicious! I think the chunky hiking sandals could be non-frumpy, if you wore them with cycling shorts, an oversized luxey feel jumper and a fabulous tan it would be a good look! Like retired supermodel in LA vibes 😂 it’s the mix of classic like jeans or a floaty skirt and then paired with the ‘practical’ like cardigan/old coat/hiking sandals that equals frump imo. Xx

*frumpy not grumpy!

Women of a 'certain age' have typically been expected to a)cover up their bodies b) blend into the background c) put their own needs/interests to bed in favour of the needs of others. This is what has created the myth of the middle aged 'frump'. So to stick two fingers to the Patriarchy and reclaim middle age as something positive I'd say a) don't hide your shape and wear more form fitting clothes, it is always more flattering than loose shapeless clothes b) wear brighter coloured clothes and/or bold pattern colour is just an easy way to feel more positive and have more impact (for most people, if you love black, then rock black) c) put time/effort into finding a hairstyle you like (don't just give up on your hair).

well sage green is out @Maireas but lime green or emerald green would make me glow

@Maireas no dismissal. My mum is 83 and fabulous and my firmed is 63 and fabulous. My godmother is 75 and ultra fabulous. I'm 46 and cursed with gynae and gastric problems that caused me to have a bloated abdomen and being short and wide makes me think I'd look like this at 63. My face is relatively young and I have long golden hair (natural) so I'm lucky in one hand but my body gets me down. My daughter says it's a mum's body and I should be proud of what it's done. Bless her.

The ‘cure’, it seems, to avoid being ‘frumpy’ is to have plenty spare money and time to spend on yourself. Nice nails, good haircut, pressed, clean ironed clothes, understated (but well done) make up.

i am 45, have 3 teenagers who I spend half my life running after, an elderly mum who needs me more each day, a full time high pressure job. I know I look frumpy with my tops to hide my expanding belly, loose fit trousers to fit my arse in, and shoes that are more comfort than style.

I wish I was a bit slimmer, could be arsed going to the gym but after a 10 hr workday, two visits to my mum daily, helping with homework, making dinner and my share of housework, I just can’t be bothered. I’m embracing the frump.

maybe I’ll be fabulous in my 50s.

I agree with those saying for me its a lack of confidence, how the person carries themselves, wearing an outfit that says god i want to disappear/hide myself/cover myself up. Its someone who has forgotten to have fun with their appearance.

It can be a very simple outfit with a fabulous red lip and handbag.

Or a simple dress with statement necklace.

Interesting eyewear.

Being groomed. Good regular haircut. Neat brows and nails. Moisturised skin. Slick of appropriate and up to date make up.

@AlternativelyWired - your daughter said a lovely and true thing! Be proud of our bodies that have held new life, eaten well, cared for each other, had laughter and woes.
What a terrible thing this desperation not to age is, not to show signs of a woman's life. Frumpy in the dictionary does note it "typically refers to women", but we knew that.

Go for them both.
In one outfit 👍

Colours themselves are neither stylish or unstylish imo. Fabrics can be horrible /nice in any colour, and people will have preferences for and/or suit certain colours. I look awful in beige, for example, but that doesn't mean beige is frumpy.

'Frumpy'

How does asking whats frumpy -nasty, misogynistic, actually help the op though?

Surely its more positive to ask how to look stylish, up to date etc

@TimetohittheroadJack

in my opinion I think you are already fabulous

There are often threads about how to look more expensive, or more 'put together' - i think frumpy is just the opposite of that. Nothing to do with age, or if you wear cardigans, just how much thought has gone in to what you wear / how you look, and making the most of what you've got (note: this very definitely is NOT the same thing as spending loads of money or time on your appearance- more targeting the effort in the right way).

@GuerlainHo Exactly.

Most people on the street with grey hair don’t look like Helen Mirren

I see lots of women with well cut grey hair out and about who aren’t Helen Mirren. I thought we’d put that bit too of nonsense to bed.

Love this French woman—she is very informative about what makes women look frumpy and her videos are fun:
m.youtube.com/watch?v=GSHtGREf3wk

I'm curious to know what these "critical of everything" MNers look like or if they just post weird crap for the "fun" of it.

Which particular 'weird crap' are you referring to?

The posters who name several items of clothing, or just normal daily stuff like grey hair, and say it looks frumpy.

I wonder what they wear.

@Imtoooldforallthis me too:(

@EmmaH2022 Yes!

For what it's worth, I took my grey-haired self out today wearing an old denim midi-skirt, a slightly cropped black t-shirt and Converse. Red lipstick. I won't have set anybody's world on fire, but it was weather appropriate and entirely suited to a trip to a coffee shop and then a walk.

I wonder what they wear.

I often wonder too. They’ll never tell us though.