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Original poster

Woman just had a go at me for my child

313 replies

didsomebodaysayyyjusteat · 12/08/2022 10:28

I've got a 1 year old DD. She's short so when holding her hand she really reaches up. She's steady on her feet and has been walking for months. Also with the weather being hot her little hands get a bit clammy so if she bolted her hands can easily slip from my grip.

Was browsing in boots this morning and noticed a woman making comments under her breath.

Got round to a different aisle and she muttered something under her breath again. It was only us and her In the aisle so I said 'are you talking to me? I can't quite hear you'

She snapped 'why have you put your poor child on a dog lead, is your child a dog?!'

I didn't know what to say, no one's ever said a bad thing about reins to me and I've never thought they were an issue! Didn't say anything then but was pissed off.

Then we met again on the toothpaste aisle. Final interaction. She was browsing the section of toothpaste / mouthwash and I just mentioned to her she ought to probably pick something up as her breath was humming & my 'dog' didn't want to be around an offensive stench.

I've never heard of Reins being a bad thing??? Why would they be classed as a bad thing? Do people tend to have different views on reins and if so, why?

I probably shouldn't have said anything to wind her up looking back but what's wrong with reins!?

OP posts:
SleepingStandingUp · 12/08/2022 18:36

didsomebodaysayyyjusteat · 12/08/2022 18:04

And you bothered to read it BiscuitBiscuit

Show quote history

Yes, which is why i commented on ALL of ot, not just the bits you intended people to read in amongst loads of stuff people were meant to not read.

worriedatthistime · 12/08/2022 18:53

I would of told her to mind her own business and politely fuck off
Your child , your choice

worriedatthistime · 12/08/2022 18:56

So what if you said something to her , she chose to say something first , consequences to actions isn't there
Maybe she will mind her business next time

Interested in this thread?

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Families
GETTINGLIKEMYMOTHER · 12/08/2022 20:21

Nothing’s wrong with reins. The woman is an idiot.

ThinkOfABetterUsername · 12/08/2022 20:26

didsomebodaysayyyjusteat · 12/08/2022 18:06

@DancingBeanstalk

Someone said something that pissed me off.
I said something back. I didn't swear, I didn't shout, I didn't snap.

My 1 year old daughter is hardly going to be taking ANY notice of me advising a random person to purchase some toothpaste as their breath ponged.

She bloody will. 😡

Before she was talking properly I told my daughter I was in Oasis.

Having never made the same gag again 3-4 years later in yr1 she managed to convey that "fact" to classmates. Who somehow passed it on to their parents. And I had to admit to a group of people at the school gate that I hadn't played on Wonderwall.

All because of a hilarious fib I told a toddler.

So give it 4 years. She'll be calling her teacher dog breath and the fall out will be on you..

😡

Original poster
didsomebodaysayyyjusteat · 13/08/2022 13:41

@ThinkOfABetterUsername

Cool story bro

OP posts:
Classicblunder · 13/08/2022 13:52

Each to their own but I am surprised by this thread and the other one on reins in that I very very rarely see them used.

I also don't see the need for my kids to hold my hand at all times - yes when crossing the road but in a shop, I would just let them walk on their own and keep an eye on them. My younger one can be a pain so I often take the buggy and if he acts up, I put him in it. Sure, sometimes I need to dash after one of them but I would find constant hand holding or reins a real pain!

BloodAndFire · 13/08/2022 14:39

didsomebodaysayyyjusteat · 12/08/2022 18:06

@DancingBeanstalk

Someone said something that pissed me off.
I said something back. I didn't swear, I didn't shout, I didn't snap.

My 1 year old daughter is hardly going to be taking ANY notice of me advising a random person to purchase some toothpaste as their breath ponged.

Hang on. Earlier you were saying how wonderful you were for teaching your daughter that women should not be silenced.

Which one is it?

Original poster
didsomebodaysayyyjusteat · 13/08/2022 17:29

@BloodAndFire hello goady goad

If you actually read, I wasn't silenced. I said something to her. I was merely explaining my tone of voice. IE I didn't shout, snap or swear.

Try another.

OP posts:
Original poster
didsomebodaysayyyjusteat · 13/08/2022 17:31

@BloodAndFire

Also - please could you point out where I said I thought what I doing was wonderful?

You pearl clutchers would pick holes if I shouted and swore and told her to fuck off to. So.. which one is it?

OP posts:
revipetitly · 13/08/2022 20:33

My son is autistic and hyperactive, and if I did not put a harness on him he would run into traffic. He's 5 years old and he's strong and fast. I wonder if this lady thinks that she could bring my kid back to life if he were to get hit by a car?

Cherryana · 13/08/2022 20:44

To add my two pennies in - I remember being a little girl and having reins and I loved them!

OhTheLeetleHandsAndFeetle · 13/08/2022 20:47

Well, some people are rude, OP. It doesn’t mean you have to be as equally unpleasant and confrontational.

LilliaJones · 14/08/2022 13:52

revipetitly · 13/08/2022 20:33

My son is autistic and hyperactive, and if I did not put a harness on him he would run into traffic. He's 5 years old and he's strong and fast. I wonder if this lady thinks that she could bring my kid back to life if he were to get hit by a car?

A very harrowing but factual statement.

Keeping children safe is a must, and if parents get snide comments and people being rude, anyone in my opinion is entitled to be rude back.

The woman was a nutcase comparing a child on reins to a dog.

KarenOLantern · 15/08/2022 11:24

Classicblunder · 13/08/2022 13:52

Each to their own but I am surprised by this thread and the other one on reins in that I very very rarely see them used.

I also don't see the need for my kids to hold my hand at all times - yes when crossing the road but in a shop, I would just let them walk on their own and keep an eye on them. My younger one can be a pain so I often take the buggy and if he acts up, I put him in it. Sure, sometimes I need to dash after one of them but I would find constant hand holding or reins a real pain!

How old are you talking about though? My DD started walking around 12 months, and for the first 8-10 months of walking she liked to wander around completely at random if she didn't have an adult making physical contact with her and constantly going "no, this way, no, this way. No, walk straight ahead please. Mind that man." It made walking down a pavement virtually impossible, although walking along pedestrianised paths was safe, but we still needed to maintain physical contact with her to encourage her to walk in the right direction and stop her walking into the paths of bikes or under people's feet. And if I looked up to check the surroundings (eg. to check for any bikes coming) she'd be completely out of my line of vision, and even 3 seconds of me looking away would be enough for her to walk off in the complete wrong direction (under someone's feet, towards some dog poo, towards some stinging nettles). Also, frankly, it was exhausting having to keep chasing after her literally every 5 seconds if we weren't holding her hand. She absolutely loved walking though. So our choices were: either keep her in the pushchair constantly, even though she wanted to get out and walk, let her out on pedestrianised paths but be bent over constantly, giving ourselves a bad back whilst unable to properly survey our surroundings, or reins.

Now she's 2 and a half we rarely need to use the reins now as she's mostly got the hang of walking in a straight line, although we still use them in train stations and near water for safety as she can't be 100% trusted yet.

Bunbuns3 · 15/08/2022 12:51

There is something about strangers confronting women trying to look after their children that irks me no end. I mean of all the nasty things that happen in the world, it just seems like easy pickings to me to do that.

I had a few looks and comments when my 4 year old was younger and had reigns, which I mostly ignored, and I fully intend to use them for my 1 year old at some point in the near future.

I was in a public toilet last week when this lady confronted me about wiping sand of my childrens legs after a day at the beach. People like that are horrible, no other word for it.

RooniIWazlib · 15/08/2022 13:03

didsomebodaysayyyjusteat · 12/08/2022 10:52

They're like a back buckled harness and the twins are attached to a buckle at the back so she can't fiddle with it or get out of them.

And to the posters saying my comments were unhinged / on another level, probably, but if someone's going to quite literally snap at me for keeping my child safe, expect me to bite back.

Show quote history

Twins, eh? 🤔

justasking111 · 15/08/2022 13:13

Keep using the reins. They're useful for toddlers because you can avoid a trip, face plant and chipped teeth, bloody nose. When they're older it stops them running into traffic. Sometimes hold mummy's hand just doesn't cut it. They're off like a rocket

Original poster
didsomebodaysayyyjusteat · 15/08/2022 18:43

@RooniIWazlib

What's with the face, ever heard of a typo?

I meant straps and ended up writing twins probably whilst dealing with my toddler.
Pick holes in something else.

OP posts:
Original poster
didsomebodaysayyyjusteat · 15/08/2022 18:46

justasking111 · 15/08/2022 13:13

Keep using the reins. They're useful for toddlers because you can avoid a trip, face plant and chipped teeth, bloody nose. When they're older it stops them running into traffic. Sometimes hold mummy's hand just doesn't cut it. They're off like a rocket

Especially sweaty little hands in this heat!
She's been saved many a time from grazed knees and face plants. I'll use them until she's ready not to have them, they're great things.

Someone said I think below, I imagine poor James' Bulgers mum wished he was wearing reins the day he was abducted.

OP posts:
TXmum3 · 17/08/2022 21:26

I don't know if I would ever use them but I'm not against them. As with many safety items for kids, we as parents have to choose for our children and ourselves what we believe is the best route. If reins are the best for you and your kid, then that is all that matters. Strangers opinions are nothing compared to what your mom gut tells you. The dog comment is just ridiculous. I get wanting to say something because it feels like a personal attack on your parenting, however that person doesn't know you and doesn't deserve your acknowledgement, don't waste energy on them.

chubbachub · 17/08/2022 21:39

I'm neither for nor against the use of reins on children so have no comment on that. What I will say though is that I simply just don't believe that this happened:

"Then we met again on the toothpaste aisle. Final interaction. She was browsing the section of toothpaste / mouthwash and I just mentioned to her she ought to probably pick something up as her breath was humming & my 'dog' didn't want to be around an offensive stench. "

Original poster
didsomebodaysayyyjusteat · 17/08/2022 22:23

chubbachub · 17/08/2022 21:39

I'm neither for nor against the use of reins on children so have no comment on that. What I will say though is that I simply just don't believe that this happened:

"Then we met again on the toothpaste aisle. Final interaction. She was browsing the section of toothpaste / mouthwash and I just mentioned to her she ought to probably pick something up as her breath was humming & my 'dog' didn't want to be around an offensive stench. "

Evening Chubbachub.

Well I'm telling you it happened. I'm sure if I wanted to make a total random thread up I'd pick something better than my child being on reins and telling someone their breath stank.

Hmm
OP posts:
DaisyJoy1 · 18/08/2022 00:27

I love your reply to her 😂
Good for you!

DangerouslyBored · 18/08/2022 06:38

Woman was v rude to think it was her place to say something to you, and yes, I totally believe that you had every right to respond accordingly, as I would have done. However, your response just took you down to her level. A simple, “I suggest you mind your own business” would have been more appropriate. Your response was pretty deranged!