The most outrageous way you’ve been fat shamed?

[Notbeinfunnehbut]

This is in part inspired by a TikTok video and it made me laugh so much that I thought that a similar thread here might get some interesting responses,
keep it civil please obviously post what you want but don’t be attacking posters for their lived experiences

I also think these things really highlight how people who are rude to the overweight are rarely doing it out of concern

Ok I’ll go, my grandma only lets certain people in the family sit on some vintage chairs at the bottom of the garden , as they “aren’t as sturdy as my other chairs” me , husband and my mum are not allowed on the chairs 🙈

....the sheer volume of casual everyday cruelty makes this just about the most depressing thread I've ever read on here.

Age 12 shy…… friends mum “if you had smaller boobs you wouldn’t look as fat”

Dad prob same age “you know it is ok to feel hungry and not eat, the rumbling is your fat burning away” 🙄

and it seems that mothers are the main perpetrators with misogynistic men a close second. So many of the abuse hurled by strangers seems to be extreme misogyny topped up with fat shaming.

So many appalling men polluting our world.

usually the ‘eww who would want to fuck you?’

im a mouthy cow and often yell back.

mostly it’s the being ignored. It’s pretty obvious you don’t register to most men because you’re not a sexual object and the ones that do talk to me generally are the kind of men I’d like around. Being fat is great for filtering out the arseholes. It’s just a shame so many of those arseholes have to open their mouths.

Ive posted this one before -at my dm funeral an older relative said whilst i was standing by my mums grave youve put on some weight havent you

just not the time or place really-not that theres a good time to say it

I had severe anorexia as a teenage (under hospital and psychiatric care). I recall going for a walk around the block at my lowest weight (clothes falling off me, no energy) and a young guy came out of his house and yelled “hey you fat bitch! You need to lose some weight!”

In a way it was quite helpful because it made me realise (even in my disturbed mental state) that some men will say anything to upset women, even if what they say has no bearing on reality. A lot of the time it is misogyny rather than fat shaming - men just want to say things that they think will be most hurtful to women, and “fat” is an easy and obvious choice.

moonlight1705 · Today 09:55

John Lewis recently called me up to cancel my personal shopping experience as they would nothing in store to fit me. I am a size 18/20 so big but not completely unusual.

A few weeks ago I nipped in to M&S to get some summer tops assuming that would be my best chance of getting something in my size in the small town. There was naff all in size 22. Asked at the till and was told I can order larger sizes online.

I conclude they don't want people who wear larger sizes spoiling the 'naice ambiance'. Happy to take the hint.

I went to a raft-building thing as part of a friend's hen and we all had to queue up for a wetsuit at the start. Everyone else was giving their size once they reached the front, but when I got there the woman just yelled out "XL" and handed me my wetsuit...I was mortified, my friend was stood right next to me and I was only a size 12-14.

My aunt who hadn’t seen me since I was much younger used to send size 14-16 clothes as birthday presents as my Dad had told her I was large. I was a size 10.

That's terrible, I'm sorry.

I just remembered my dad used to make a habit of saying to people (in front of me) that I was 'built for comfort, not speed' and then guffawing heartily.

Also once when I said to my mum (my parents always seemed far more bothered by my weight than I was myself) that it didn't actually bother me that I was a bit plump, she snapped, 'What's all this 'plump' business? You're fat!'

I was perhaps one dress size above what I should have been when all this was going on, and the sad thing is that when I look back at photos of me then, I think I looked fine as I was. But I was brought up on a constant narrative that I wasn't. And then they wondered why I grew up unconfident.

Random man, once he had walked past, looked back over his shoulder and shouted "Why don't you go on a fucking diet or something". I was pregnant.

OMG
This is awful
I always been skinny.
But after losing the baby weight a 'friend' said something like 'oh that was when you were fat and big ' or some such comment that was completely uncalled for.
Idiot man.
My sister has always carried more weight than me. 16 to my size 10
I DON'T CARE
I love her ti bits.
I never mentioned her weight (as long as she's healthy.)
I know it upsets her and the only time she ever got upset/ fell out with our Father was if he was 'foolish' enough to mention her weight.
I think over the years she maybe has felt jealous of me which makes me really sad.
That society makes skinny fashionable and judges people so mercilessly is disgraceful.
Do you know how much Florence Knightingale weighed?
No .,,,,,,,?
( because it doesn't matter)
And don't get me started on eating disorders)

Dad called me the Michelin man from about 4yo. His mother was awful for comments too. I stopped visiting her when i grew up and didn't once go to see her in her care home. Ate tonnes of cake at the funeral, though.

On a night out once some man made a big performance about trying to get past me in a hallway. Exaggerating it like a mime artist for 'comic' effect, pretending i was huge. I usually completely ignore anything like that because I just want to humiliation done and gone asap but i was just at the point of pissed-ness for a confrontation. I cornered him and asked him why he did that. He replied because you're fat and it's funny. I said i knew i was fat, why did he want to upset me. He said he didn't, it was just a joke. It was bizarre, he seemed confused it was in any way wrong. I guess to him it wasn't because why should he give a shit about a fat bird's feelings - don't even register as a person. He did then try to get off with me then called me a fat cunt when i said no. So absolutely no point trying to analyse these men, they certainly don't have the capacity to analyse themselves.

I did lose a lot of weight and became thin after a lifetime of being fat. The compliments were non stop but i absolutely hated them. They were probably well meant but all i could think off was what they must have previously thought of me. That's very pessimistic I know but it just made me sad for fat me - going about her business not fully aware how badly friends and family were thinking of my size. Strangers and bullies I knew how they felt but the praise and the relief from nearest and dearest that i was now 'normal' felt bad. Like now i was in the club where they felt free to slag off fat people. Urgh, it's all horrible.

@AlohaMolly

I was a very thin but curvy teenager - 5 foot 8 and size 6-8 but with 32c boobs and hips. My mum, an overweight woman, was so proud. I was very academic and very fit but her pride and joy was my waist.
^^
Wow
I could have written similar
I was clever but when mum talked to her friends it was all.
'Oh dd is so slim'
It made me feel like that was all I was worth.

I'm still slim but it took a good while (years) to get to the point where I valved all of myself and dm was taking crap.

I am stunned at just how many Cunty parents there are out there (as well as complete Assholes).
I had one woman who was having a bitchfest about one of my friends who has a weight issue. She soon realised that I wasn't going to join in!

Was told by my Mum that if I didn't stop eating I would end up on Jerry Springer getting winched out of my house by a crane.

Awful.
I've got enough stories from my mum and my weight to keep a newly qualified therapist going until their retirement, such is my mum's obsession with my weight! I'm nearer 60 than 50 and she still goes on about it!
I was weighged weekly when I was about 13. My mum told me that dad watched me walking down the street with two friends that called for me and he said 'god, you should see the size of cooldad's arse, it is like this '....... and then waved her hands about to demonstrate a huge wobbly bum!
At my grandad's funeral I was last to arrive and mum said later ' Oh my god, me and your dad can't believe the state of you in that dress, you look massive, my god!!!!' I bloody loved that dress and paid £250 for it. I never wore it again.
The comments go on and on and I get flashes of things that have been said over the last 45 years and have learned to live with them.

I have put weight on over the last 3 years and had gone up to a 16 but now at a 14 (5ft 5) but when I was about 22 I went down to 7stone 8lbs and looked really ill. Mum said I was too thin!!

I have a husband that tells me I look great and has loved me unconditionally for over 30 years. I have friends that make me feel important to them and don't put me down. I have sons' that pull me up if I say negative things about myself. I consider myself ''blessed'' despite the bullshit I still listen to when I have a conversation with my mother!

Blimey! It was rather cathartic writing that!

Some of these are so fucking sad and awful. Big hugs to all you lovely women who have suffered from others' thoughtless, rude or shitty comments.

Mine isn't as bad but I have always remembered it. My mum. I was about 14, wearing a new crop top. I was showing Mum and she said 'it would look better without that roll of fat.'

Looking back at photos of me then? I was gorgeous. Not skinny but not overweight.

Another one: on my wedding day, when I was just under 9 stone, my lowest adult weight: 'you look fine.'

Not very good at giving compliments, my mum 🙄🙄

When i was pregnant, beginning of the second trimester i went to a doctor, private clinic, amazing reviews, very expensive. My husband wanted to hear the heartbeat and i wanted to check if everything is ok as i had little bigger belly for this stage of the pregnancy. My parents came too with us. He grabbed my belly by pinching my fat in front of my family saying my belly is big because i am fat. I almost cried. Size 14.
it turned out i had two large fibroids in my belly caused by the pregnancy hormones, 13 and 8 cm and that time, got bigger at the end of the pregnancy. I still have them and look like i am 6 months pregnant but nothing can be done about them atm

Another one is my mom always saying when i was a young teenager i can loose 3-4kgs only and it will be great. And i was always worried about food and my look and was always on sort of a diet (nothing unhealthy though)
i was really really pretty as a teenager before i gained weight in my 20’s

I was changing at the gym and chatting to a woman I vaguely knew. Must have been about size 14/16 at the time. Somehow the conversation turned to weight and I mentioned I’d recently lost a couple of stone. ‘Gosh you must have been enormous,’ she said.

@notacooldad
That's awful
And you do not have to take.
Tell her to 'do one'
And with draw!!

I got on the bus pushing my toddler in a buggy and an able-bodied man travelling alone refused to move from the buggy space.
Him (randomly): You know your problem? You need to lose weight.
Me: Well I could easily lose 12 stone if you got off the bus.
At that point, the driver got involved and insisted he move.
It's the one and only time I've ever been fat-shamed but I'm glad I gave as good as I got.

I use to be skinny, now Im a little bit chonky thanks to having 3 kids and I think everyone faces these things regarless of it they are size 6 or size 26 (even when I was annorexic I got called fat occasionally by bullies), its not really about you but just a basic bullying tactic that people are trying to get you upset.

What always makes me laugh is in my teens (when I was skinny) I faced the opposit, when I would reject a guy the butt hurt guys always yelled the same thing... 'well, you're too skinny for me anyway' usually followed by mutterings of how 'real women' have 'meat on them' and I should 'eat a proper meal' etc... I always just sat there thinking 'and yet you took the time out of your day to approach me out of the blue and creepily hit on me incel style because Im so 'not your type'' lol.

It sucks when someone points out a flaw your self concous about whatever it is.

Its hilarious when someone tries to mock something your comfortable about.

Thats just life and some people will always try to hurt others, just hold your head up and laugh when they fail.

I can't understand your logic @MiniPiccolo. How is saying "larger" required?

"The lady will ride Apollo" is all that was necessary to ensure that the PP was mounted on a suitable horse.

I was always a constant size 12 throughout my life but since menopause 4 years ago, my appetite has changed and I just don’t need as much to feel full and have settled to a comfortable size 10. I’m 5’6” and weigh 57kg so bang in the middle of ideal. I’m fit and healthy, have loads of energy and feel good about my appearance - until my DH tells me I’m too thin, I need to put on more weight and my boobs are not like they used to be.

DH is 5’10”, weighs 98kg, sadly falls asleep whenever he sits down, has very high BP and snores like a pneumatic drill at night.