The most callous/inappropriate words of condolences you’ve seen

[Eastie77Returns]

My friends husband recently died. They were a lively, party hard couple who hosted parties with epic drinking sessions and were known as users of recreational drugs. The husband died from an illness that could be linked to excessive drinking but at this stage none of us (friends of wife) know exactly what killed him.

One of our friends has written on his memorial page (I’m paraphrasing a bit): “RIP xxx. Gone too soon, you were a lovely soul. Your lifestyle caught up with you in the end but you lived life to the full and not everyone can say that”. She is not a native English speaker so I have no idea if she meant it to come across the way it did but all of us were WTF when we read it😮

I’m veering between finding it comically inappropriate and a bit callous and not sure which of the two it falls under!

They're also called “tubal pregnancies” because most of them happen in the fallopian tubes. Whether there's a problem with the egg or the tube, the egg gets stuck on its journey to the uterus. A pregnancy can't survive outside of the uterus, so all ectopic pregnancies must end. MN is a deeply unforgiving place, the treatment of this poster is disgusting and all those who contributed should be ashamed of yourselves.

So have I, as I said.

Theres plenty of compassion, but the pp can't lose her shit at people for using the correct words for things. Being upset doesn't mean words change meaning. IT is what it is, and its not the wording that makes it hard.

So one person who had an ectopic should be ashamed of themselves for not letting another person who had an ectopic berate others for using completely accurate and normal terminology.

Why, exactly?

This discussion about whether or not treatment for ectopic pregnancies is a form of termination seems to have killed this thread. Please, can you agree to disagree? It's okay to have differing opinions and it's a very sensitive subject. People are reading and could have strong feelings from either view. It might it be an idea to let this go now and allow this thread to move on.

@Georgeskitchen

'Best way without making things worse is probably a simple " sorry for your loss"'

Exactly. But people feel they have to bumble something else too, and it usually pours awkwardly out of their mouths without the engagement of a verbal filter.