Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

She brought our desserts to the table and placed them in front of us.. and then...

235 replies

Bunty55 · 09/06/2022 15:45

the waitress placed my spoon into my custard.
I was miffed.

I am 67, just had my birthday. I am the same as I ever was, same face, same figure, same vitality. The only thing that is different about me is the colour of my hair. I quit dyeing it two years ago and it is now silver.

I have noticed that I am sort of becoming invisible in a way I never imagined, and both my daughter and I think it is because of my hair.
Everyone at the table noticed what she did and were gobsmacked. I had to fish the spoon out and wipe it down since half of the handle was covered in bloody custard.
I would not even do that to my grandchildren !
I like my hair colour, but I do not like being treated as if I am in need of help.
Luckily, she did not offer to feed me :(

OP posts:
GiltEdges · 09/06/2022 15:53

I'm lost as to what your hair colour or age have to do with this Confused

AppropriateAdult · 09/06/2022 15:53

It’s a bit odd, but it seems even odder to jump to the conclusion that she thought you were infirm or needed assistance 🤔Thats not something I’d do for child, I would tend to hand them the spoon directly. I can’t imagine that was why she did it.

Bunty55 · 09/06/2022 15:54

We thought my hair colour was the reason she treated me like I was in need help. She did not do it to anyone else at the table. They all thought it was funny. I didn't. It made me feel old and useless

OP posts:
nomistake · 09/06/2022 15:55

Eh? Think you've read too much into this.

Bunty55 · 09/06/2022 15:57

At the time I was upset. I'm not now. Putting the spoon in though...... it went beyond the pale:)

OP posts:
Johnnysgirl · 09/06/2022 16:01

What an odd thread.

PangolinPie · 09/06/2022 16:02

Why do you think putting a spoon into custard was a reference to your age! Maybe she's just not trained fully. Are you having a laugh?

Bunty55 · 09/06/2022 16:04

No I'm not having a laugh at all. Its what she did and I don't know why.
My family think it's hilarious and are busy creating daft names for me now

OP posts:
JuneOsborne · 09/06/2022 16:06

So, you think she thought that because you have grey hair, it would follow that you should have your spoon in your custard? I'm struggling with the logic you're following here tbh.

Out of interest, did you just order a bowl of custard? Was that a menu item?

SirenSays · 09/06/2022 16:06

I thought you were going to say she tried to feed you or something.
Chucking a spoon in some custard and walking away, leaving you to fish it out, isn't really something you'd do to help an elderly person anyway. I'm not sure I get the connection.

PangolinPie · 09/06/2022 16:07

It sounds like it's your family you should be pissed off with.

Bunty55 · 09/06/2022 16:08

I had a dessert like all the rest of the family. Two of us had sticky toffee pudding and custard. She placed the spoon into my dish. It was decided that she thought I was an old lady because of my hair since there could not be another reason.

OP posts:
Suzi888 · 09/06/2022 16:10

Very odd if you were the only one she did it to though, then you may be right!

grey12 · 09/06/2022 16:11

You're blaming the hair because it's a new thing for you 🤷🏻‍♀️ forget about the hair. Hair or no hair let's face it you most likely don't look anywhere near 20. This is assuming she did it because of age.

Maybe she was just overworked or is a bit of a weird person....

Maybe you can go and have a cool hairstyle if you're feeling more self conscious. I saw a lady yesterday with the most beautiful silver hair!!! 🥺 soooo jealous, it was so silky and nicely styled

PangolinPie · 09/06/2022 16:11

"It was decided" Who by? You or your family?

lickenchugget · 09/06/2022 16:11

Hardly ‘beyond the pale’ OP

Schmz · 09/06/2022 16:12

Mind reading waitresses, or anyone to that matter is a waste of time !

you will never know what was going on in her head as she launched that spoon into that custard !!!

Odd but thats about it !

mackthepony · 09/06/2022 16:13

I can't believe some of the responses on here.

The waitress was incredibly condescending! I'd have hit the roof.

OP, did you complain?

Bunty55 · 09/06/2022 16:13

I am not feeling self conscious at all ! I just wondered why she would do that ?

OP posts:
NotExactlyHappyToHelp · 09/06/2022 16:15

Maybe she’s got small children at home and sometimes lapses into ‘Mum’ mode. Happened to me once, I was standing next to a colleague who was serving a customer and when they didn’t say please I chirped ‘What’s the magic word?’ Blush

Bunty55 · 09/06/2022 16:15

mackthepony

No I didn't complain. I think maybe I should have. It spoiled a nice time and we won't be going back.

OP posts:
theyhavenothingbuttheaudacity · 09/06/2022 16:16
Confused
Johnnysgirl · 09/06/2022 16:17

Bunty55 · 09/06/2022 16:15

mackthepony

No I didn't complain. I think maybe I should have. It spoiled a nice time and we won't be going back.

Your nice times are bloody easily spoiled. Ffs!

JellyBellyNelly · 09/06/2022 16:18

I’m just a few years younger than you, I’m now completely grey through choice and it does me no harm whatsoever. In fact it’s the opposite.

Could you perhaps consider the possibility that the waitress just made a mistake, an endearing mistake, that meant nothing untoward or was a reflection on you. Quite honestly I’d have laughed at that happening.

NannyGythaOgg · 09/06/2022 16:19

I agree with you about the hair.

I find I get treated differently when I have my hair coloured (to a lighter shade than my natural) than when it is uncoloured and very grey/white.

In general people are more polite and patient I have found which is kind of a positive but when I went back to colouring it this year after 2 years off there was a noticeable change.