What would be your opinion of neighbour after this?

[Ihatemyroad]

Moved into house a couple of years ago. Regularly chat in passing with couple next door. Similar age late 30’s/early 40”s. We often take in parcels for them, have jump started one of their cars a few times, general nice neighbour type things.

We have a few items we need to take to the dump which isn’t far away, think old light highchair, toy pram, plastic kitchen bin. Our neighbour has a van. Yesterday I asked neighbour when he was going to the dump again and if I give him £10 would he take a few things for me? He would basically be going to the dump anyway, doing me a huge favour, and being given £10 to take a few light items. He said no. And then said “I’m off to the dump now”. And put a few things in his van and went.

I don’t know what to think. I’m really taken aback at him saying no and then telling me he was off to the dump that day anyway with a half empty van. So basically he just didn’t want to help me. I feel like saying ‘fuck you’ the next time they want a parcel taken in or their car jump started.

I have no words. Your neighbour is a complete twat.

In future I would not be doing neighbourly favours for them.

Stop taking in parcels for a start.

Yep decline the parcels.

I would be rethinking how helpful I was from now on. How rude of him!

Yeah I wouldn't be doing the kind neighbourly things anymore either.

What type of business does he have to have a van? Unlicensed transfer of waste can have serious implications for some trades and get them banned from amenity sites.

He pays a set amount every few months to be allowed to take his van to the dump so as far as I’m aware he’s all above board. He’s not in waste collection or anything like that.

Even giving him a massive benefit of the doubt that he felt you were being a bit cheeky asking, it was still really rude to react that way, especially as you have previously been helpful to them!
And actually, asking, not demanding, if someone would do that and offering them money is hardly CF territory anyway, so it's a huge stretch to think he was offended!
So on balance I think you've got an arse for a neighbour sadly and you should quietly withdraw any nice neighbour support as it is clearly one way traffic.
For what it's worth my neighbour is also a massive arse and I would never again go out of my way for him after he showed just how much he 'appreciated' having a nice neighbour in a similar fashion.

Let's hope they are out the next time they have a parcel delivered. No way i'd be doing them any favours from now on.

Don't do anymore favours. Don't take any parcels in and if their car won't start tell CF to walk

Thank you everyone.

Sorry to hear you have the same Topcats. I feel weirdly humiliated. I think it’s because he really didn’t need to tell me he was going to the dump that day anyway. So it doesn’t just feel like a sorry I can’t help you at the moment brush off but a no I don’t want to help you and I’m going to smile whilst I tell you no and then tell you I’m off to the dump right now.

I think I’m shocked at what a selfish arse I have for a neighbour and I never realised it before.

Is it to do with the van? Vans are a problem at our tip, they need permits etc and I think they must pay to dump. Perhaps 10 wasn’t enough to dump your stuff?

But he was a rude asshole

I'd stop helping him out tbh.
It's both ways or no ways.

There must be more to it op.

He surely didn't just say 'No. I'm going to the dump now'.

I mean people don't do that, unless they're a literal psycho.

Did he explain? Bluster? Look uncomfortable or angry?

I feel like you've only given half a story tbh.

He has a permit. And he was going anyway. And it really was only a few items nothing big or heavy or electrical etc

I think you've done something to upset him

No parcels
tell delivery person that neighbours have been difficult and rude

Nope Chancenotmal I’m absolutely telling you the truth. He listened to me and simply said No he couldn’t help, and then a pause, and then said I’m off to the dump now so got to go.

I think perhaps he’s just an arsehole and I’ve never noticed because I’ve never asked them for anything before.

He could be going through something that is effecting his MH and making him act out of character?

I agree that £10 may not cover the cost. Or his license may be for waste generated by his business.

He could have explained but I wouldn't just presume he was being bolshy.

He is a tradesman, and I know for a fact a couple of our neighbours have asked at different times to borrow a screwdriver or drill and he’s always said no or he doesn’t have one. It came up in conversation with another neighbour one day so since then neighbours have asked DP instead. They’ve always returned the items.

Have you annoyed him on some way? Seems really weird and awkward otherwise.

I think we’ve taken in our last parcel and lost our jump leads now.