The title of your memoir is the last text you sent

[IHopeYouStepOnALegPiece]

Inspired by the ridiculousness of mine.

“There’s a pube on my bloody donut”

Your cat is at our house. Let me know when you're home and I'll bring him home x

Does your electric keep going on and off

Don't know if it's small knockers are a fat arse

Lol

Small knickers or a fat arse

"fuck you then"

Do we owe you any money?

Thanks for your support

It was better than I thought!

I quite like that 😂

Forget crisps - bring chocolate.

Yes!

Even if you don't have breakfast, I will!

It was 'wow'. Family watts app conversation about the horrible way the dad of one of the curling team had reacted to his son getting a silver.

First time ever, wish me luck
😆

But a lizardy thing is similar to a snake.

Booooooo-

I like it

I have an assignment thing at 7.

Probably over compensating

Mine was a photo of me with the dog's foot in my eye.

Thank you for coming

Ok sat reading t'internet in the car park so see you when you're ready

I’ll Call You When It’s Ready

Horse for scale

"you're a hero! 🥕"

Carrot emoji integral

@Hellocatshome

But a lizardy thing is similar to a snake.

'Harry Potter and the lizardy thing that's similar to a snake'. People would queue round the block for that