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Original poster

What easy things are you just shit at?

426 replies

coastergirl · 11/02/2022 20:09

It's ridiculous. I'm a 37 year old woman. I have 2 kids, a job I love. I function reasonably well!

I cannot butter bread. I make a complete mess of it. Holes in the bread etc. I can't blame it on hard butter because I use marg.

I'm ill and bored. Please make me feel better by telling me the "easy" things you're shit at.

OP posts:
Original poster
coastergirl · 11/02/2022 22:50

@SiliconDioxide79

Remembering where I have hidden Christmas presents Snacks Etc Get well soon This post has cheered me up!

Thank you! It's cheered me up too. I'm glad I'm not the only one useless at everyday things.

OP posts:
Troubleinpergatory · 11/02/2022 22:52

Oh god loads of things, I'm positively shit at life but to name a few:

Anything mathematical

Keeping on top of housework
Making and remembering appointments
Dealing with basic admin

I suspect I may have undiagnosed ADHD or something unless some people like me are just, as I mentioned, shit at life Confused

Applying make-up nicely
Putting together a stylish outfit
Making a quality cup of tea
Cooking the right portions of rice/pasta
Keeping in touch with people/responding to messages
Navigating my way around London despite living here for over 5 years

I could go on all night Grin

Shunter350 · 11/02/2022 22:52

Tying knots.

Original poster
coastergirl · 11/02/2022 22:52

[quote savehannah]@coastergirl see I know the theory. But that pan of boiling water goes off the boil when you put cold eggs in it. So do you time the 6 minutes from when it starts bubbling again or when you put the egg in? Sometimes it takes ages to be boiling again. Also everyone disagrees on the time. BBC food says 4-5 minutes for soft boiled. Other recipes say 7!

Delia's method is 1 minute boiling then switch off and leave in the pan for 6 minutes. Like I said this worked once and only once for me.

Does it make a difference how many eggs you put in at once? Like so many other things on this thread, I don't understand it - I can cook and bake most other things competently. The expression "can't even boil an egg" infuriates me![/quote]

I've done up to 4 in one pan using this method. I do think that using a gas hob makes a difference because I can get the water boiling again really quickly. I've lived in houses with electric hobs before and lots of things were far more difficult.

OP posts:
Norugratsatall · 11/02/2022 22:53

Cannot roll my'r's. And.....

Omelettes. Nope.

thenewduchessoflapland · 11/02/2022 22:54

For those who can't cook rice

Buy a rice cooker;I have a tefal one and it's a lifesaver;worth every penny.

Can't poach an egg?

Boil water in a pan;line a mug/glass with cling film,crack in your egg,twist tight at the end and Chuck in the pan of boiling water.

I can't offer much advice on frying eggs/omelettes but it took me years to master in.I find eggs cook better if the pan is really hot;I put my egg in,leave for a minute then turn down the heat abit.

For hair curling;I brought one of those automatic hair wrap curler thing's;it does the job.

Eyeshadow;those eyeshadow sticks make things so much easier than power and brushes

Now can anyone help me open bloody sauce sachets;I can't open those little packets of ketchup etc to save my life.

XenoBitch · 11/02/2022 22:55

I can't do omelettes either. They always end up as scrambled.

Franticbutterfly · 11/02/2022 22:56

Looking for things in the house. DH always takes over because he knows I'll
never find what I'm looking for even if it's right under my nose!

goingback · 11/02/2022 22:57

going to bed

personal grooming- just had to stop shaving

crabb · 11/02/2022 22:58

Wrapping presents neatly. My husband always produces beautifully wrapped gifts with straight lines, knife edge folds, and perfect tucks. Mine always look like they were wrapped by a toddler. (See also: cutting wrapping paper in straight lines, as above)

MrsDeltaB · 11/02/2022 22:58

Yes yes to French plaits! I can see it, I know how it's meant to be, my fingers just don't work that way!

Opening cans. Tuna specifically. Always hit a blunt spot and I've tried battery automatic ones and still fluff it up!

Forgothowmuchlhatehomeschoolin · 11/02/2022 22:59

@Riseabove

I cannot fry an egg for shit.
Put it in when the oil is cold and let them heat up together
BriocheForBreakfast · 11/02/2022 23:00

@foxlover47

Cooking rice , unless it's boil in the bag it's always ended up inedible :(
I have a Tupperware rice cooker. It's fab! I rinse a mug of basmati rice and then add it to the pot with a mug and a third-ish of cold water. Stick it in the microwave on high for 10 mins and let it rest for at least 5 mins. Comes out great every time and you don't have to watch it.
MrsDeltaB · 11/02/2022 23:01

Cling film! Agreed 100%. Devils work!

ColonelPine · 11/02/2022 23:01

Directions. I get lost all the time and have no concept in my head of which direction I’m going in, how to get from one place to another, where I’ve just been etc. It’s actually very disconcerting when I think about it too much. I function fine on a day to day level but I’m just terrible with directions.

Leftbutcameback · 11/02/2022 23:01

Knitting, running, cooking rice

Original poster
coastergirl · 11/02/2022 23:01

@Forgothowmuchlhatehomeschoolin does it not just spread across the whole pan then?

OP posts:
Leftbutcameback · 11/02/2022 23:02

And, very specifically, driving back from somewhere when a passenger has given me directions to get there. So drop someone off, no idea which way to get back out again.

Graphista · 11/02/2022 23:03

@AnnaK163 wow! I'm going to be a famous bin whisperer! Well there has to be at least ONE plus to having sodding ocd!

As I said written down it feels lengthy but it really isn't

Egg poacher incompetents - am I right we've read and tried all these tips before?!

Making and remembering appointments

For really important stuff I don't set calendar reminders I set alarms! I set and label alarms on my phone with the most loud annoying alarm sound set.

I do this for amending my Tesco order, ordering repeat prescriptions, medical appointments...

Cannot roll my'r's.

Here is where I'm very weird - I can roll the r in my name - cannot do it with other words! Wtf is that about?!

motherknowsbest1 · 11/02/2022 23:03

Custard
Always lumpy and burnt
I buy it in the tin now

Mistlewoeandwhine · 11/02/2022 23:03

I can’t drive or make decent rice. I’m 51.

TheDoveFromAboveCooCoo · 11/02/2022 23:04

@TheTurn0fTheScrew

keeping house plants alive. Whenever I ask people how they do it, they look at me like I'm an idiot and mutter "water, air, sun, food". I provide all of these things and I am still surrounded by dessicated vegetation.
Yup defo this here too. I had a cactus on my home desk at one point and even that bloody died!
ladygindiva · 11/02/2022 23:05

Driving a car. Can't do it. Can't pass my test. I'm talented in my field, an incredible multitasker, fairly intelligent ( read big books, get answers on uni challenge etc) but I cannot drive a fucking car.

BriocheForBreakfast · 11/02/2022 23:06

I'm rubbish at anything that requires fine motor skills. I also can't look after a plant without killing it. I'm not great at cracking eggs without breaking them.

Wincarnis · 11/02/2022 23:06

Wearing jewellery, I feel silly in earrings and necklaces always look like the Mayor’s chain.

Cooking without making a mess