To think 'keeping a house' is a sodding full time job?

[2022herewego]

I work part time and have two DC under three, a dog and a cat.

I find looking after the house so difficult - the cooking (I try to cook from scratch 95% of the time as don't really like the taste of oven meals), cleaning, meal planning, shopping, laundry, general DIY, decluttering (have to do this regularly or we just have no space) keeping the garden looking just about okay and life admin all really gets on top of me and I feel like I'm totally drowning in it sometimes.

I know most of us have to work, sort childcare and run a house - so does everyone else find it 'all consuming' and never-ending or am I doing something wrong? I do try some hacks like batch cooking and the TOMM method but even so, I really struggle to keep on top of it all.

How does everyone else manage?

I work full time plus all drop offs plus all after school activities ferrying about

I also do al the food shopping, planning, cooking, tidying away, all financial decision making in the house and make all plans for anything

But my DH does the washing, ironing, cleaning and DIY plus working full time

I still feel the heavier burden but thankful not to have to do everything

I agree keeping house is a full time job when you have DC, pets, garden, house admin etc.
I have 4 DC, 2 dogs , 2 cats, a large garden- ok made a rod for my own back!!
some weekdays its easily 9.30pm or later before I "finish" and weekends are spent catching up on chores.
I am sometimes tempted to get a cleaner but I think Id have to clean before they came round!! not sure Id feel entirely comfortable with plus tbh not sure we can afford it and it feels like an extravagance. Can cause a lot of friction with DH as he doesnt notice what needs doing but if I ask him Im bossing him around so it no win situation but generally I end up saying doing you want to clean the kitchen or the bathroom, I dont mind which I do -you choose

It absolutely is. I'm not denying there were gaps in which I got to sit down, but I was busy all the time.

Now I'm working full time, no housework gets done and we live in a fleapit.

If I WAS a job- I’d be fired hahah
Slow cooker and robot vacuum. They are my answer to everyone’s problems
We do a good tidy the day before DMIL visits , but last week I had to say “sorry there’s washing everywhere and on every surface “

I’m quite good at multitasking? And tend to keep a little routine?
When I’m up first thing:press the Roomba with my foot as I walk across the hall so he’s off, I pop kettle on, then put baby’s porridge on the hob- while I’m waiting for that- I take out last nights wash - throw it in the dryer , stick another load on - porridge is done , tea bag out of cup. Feed baby knowing a few jobs are done and it’s 8am !
But I do have a very good baby who’s quite happy by himself for ten mins - god knows what’s it’ll be like when Baby’s mobile!!?
And I also make lists each day. So I feel I’ve achieved something lol. I made one today and ignored it , the dishes ,the mopping and event out as it was a nice day.
No regrets!

• but DH had come into a messy kitchen and is presently tidying

Having a slow cooker can be a help, Bish Bash Bosh, brown the meat before adding veg and stock cube(s)+water and a spoonful of flour near the end to thicken gravy
Chop veg and sit chicken thighs on top in casserole dish (or pork chops if just you and DH)
Shepherd's pie is easy to prepare and top with mash (+ grated cheese near the end)
Scoop kids toys into cheap plastic or cardboard storage boxes before evening meal which will make things look calmer.
Put washing on early morning then quick tidy after breakfast. Best to do a quick hoover before bed so it's fresh in the morning.
I wouldn't batch cook unless you have a huge empty freezer. You always feel that you have to eat what's there but might prefer a Spanish omelette or something different.
Chicken with Mexican rice is a good meal do roast a whole chicken and it will make 2 or 3 meals.

I work 4 days a week & have two small children plus two cats. The housework is never ending!! I do all the cooking, so I batch cook; dishes like meatballs, vegetable pasta, macaroni cheese. All other meals are really quick & easy; omelette & fries, jackets, maybe a ready meal once a week, pizza.

I manage by lowering our standards considerably and being lucky enough that we can afford to use our child benefit to cover most of the cost of two hrs cleaning a week. We’ve also compromised on cooking by stocking up on decent oven meals, using ‘Hello Fresh’ and ‘Gousto’ discount codes in both mine and DHs names then cancelled the subscriptions and used the recipe cards it for inspiration for quick and easy recipes. I save any cooking from scratch and more complicated recipes for either the slow cooker on a weekday or weekends as a treat. HTH!

Less stuff.
No pets.
Make sure the clothes you are washing are dirty. Children put clean clothes in the wash to save hanging them up.
Use disposable tinfoil trays for cooking where possible, they are inexpensive in Home bargains.
Cook easy food eg all in one oven bake type dishes like meat and veg all in the same tray.
Empty the dishwasher whilst waiting for kettle to boil in the morning.

Always empty the kitchen bins and replace the bin liners before you go to bed.
Clean your sink and draining board every day.
Keep your kitchen worktops clear and wipe your kitchen worktops regularly especially before you go to bed.

I don't think my standards could get much lower.

It's just not possible to keep up with it all as never-ending, work or no work! Only difference is when both out at work means less mess and eves and weekends doing it and sharing. Family life isn't easy and I take my hat off to Mum's of past who did it without modern technology.

We split it between us and it’s STILL all
Consuming 😂 I have all the life admin,food shopping and menu planning. Other half has laundry, diy and garden. We take turns to cook. 2 little ones and a dog and a cat. Both work FT. It’s mad. I avoid having visitors 🤣

It definitely is I had a year off on maternity leave just gone back to part time work with a one year old and honestly can’t wait till our weekend starts on a Thursday. But then you never really get a lie in with a baby do you lol. The constant cleaning up after every meal not to mention the pets

@Teenagedream

I’ve stopped ironing. Wish I had stopped years ago. Nobody noticed and it’s saved loads of time.

Same. Have cut it right down to virtually nothing

@FinallyFluid

I am retired and have a cleaner for two hours a week, an ironer, and someone to walk the dog.

Even still I could spend the whole day mooching around doing stuff, buggered if I know how I managed when I was full time or even when I went down to twenty hours.

You have my genuine sympathy.

I too am retired. I worked part-time for the last few years, but still I can't fathom how I ever had time to go out to work. I realise now that the only way I coped when working was to massively cut corners in the housework, resulting in chaos and mess. And don't even get me started on the garden!

Love and your time are what children need growing up. As long as you are not unhealthily dirty in the house don't worry. Best thing to do is to get rid of any unnecessary stuff pronto. That will make things look better and easier to clean. Good luck.

I couldn’t agree more! I work part time and still feel like I’m not on top of the house 😩

@GTAlogic

I share it with dh. He does almost all of the laundry and the food shopping and most of the cooking.

We have cheap and easy meals such as pizza, pasta and pesto, jacket spuds with cheese and beans, sausage or pie and mash with veg... the sort of thing that you can just chuck in and leave.

We don't clean every single day apart from just wiping the surfaces down and running around the house with the Hoover.

The garden is just grass and a few bushes so only needs cutting once a month.

We don't seem to have much life admin at all so it just gets done when it comes up.

I know I’m leaping on a detail here but how do you just ‘chuck in and leave’ pie and mash and veg? There are quite a few processes involved there.

Sorry, my life pretty much revolves around how long meals take to prep as opposed to just cook so I can fit them around various activities so I really notice these things!

We buy frozen pies that just go in the oven for as long as it says and whilst that's cooking the frozen veg is steamed for a few minutes in the microwave and then the frozen mash is also microwaved with a bit of butter and/or milk 👍

I think the working parents who seem really on top of things and have good social lives have help from extended family. I think being a parent without extended family is really hard, I think there should be a word for it.

It's exhausting. I've felt overwhelmed for the last 10 years since having dc. There is a constant "to do" list in my head, there is always something to buy, clean, mend, take to the tip, sort out, it just never ends. I've tried every jack going yet it isn't getting any easier. I would give up work in a flash if I could afford it.

Having pets is definitely like having extra children, particularly dogs. Why burden yourself if you can't cope with them? I'm not saying rehome them but I certainly wouldn't be replacing them when they die.

@MogsBestestFurball

I think the working parents who seem really on top of things and have good social lives have help from extended family. I think being a parent without extended family is really hard, I think there should be a word for it.

This with bells on - or pay for babysitters so have a lot of money.

Re:Robovacs
Friend had a new puppy and the robovac very artfully spread the dog poo all over the kitchen floor 😝🐕like nutella

I had never heard of the TOMM method so looked it up. It would take me hours to do what's supposed to take 30 mins a day. My advice: get a cleaner, declutter as much as you can, don't cook every meal from scratch.

@Darlingx

Re:Robovacs Friend had a new puppy and the robovac very artfully spread the dog poo all over the kitchen floor 😝🐕like nutella

That reminded me of coming down in the morning when we had a puppy - she’d pooed just behind the kitchen door, so when I opened it, the door spread it ‘beautifully’, like icing on a cake.

Mind you I’d even prefer that to the offerings our cat brought in now and then - e.g the back half of mouse, with one pathetic minute kidney hanging out….