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Original poster

Is it rude to say that a gift for your child is the wrong size?

199 replies

Dora2168 · 21/12/2021 07:44

We recently had an early Christmas party with the family and the aunts and uncles gave out presents to the children. My sister and I had a discussion before the event and she said that she would prefer clothing for her two children, so I carefully set about shopping with care for the right products and size of clothing. On the day, my nephew was overjoyed when he opened his gifts and saw that he had received a new football kit, Adidas sports tracksuit and matching Adidas trainers
His sister had new luxury winter coat and cosy jumpers. Both children were delighted and overjoyed. My 8 year old then opened his gift, and I saw his face fall when he saw a bright neon yellow track top and joggers that were at least two sizes too big slide out of the gift wrap. I felt his disappointment, especially as I had taken the time to shop with care to give a useful gift. Should I return the items as it cannot fit my child or regift it? I don't think that I would let him wear a neon yellow tracksuit.
I later found the exact item online for £10 on sale.

OP posts:
dementedpixie · 21/12/2021 07:48

Why did you spend so much? Your presents to them sound OTT. Did she provide the receipt?

Passthecake30 · 21/12/2021 07:48

I’d take it to a charity shop if you’re not able to exchange. I have had similar from my sister, clothes too small or not appropriate for my dd and just have to give them away each year, and get my dd a little something to make up for it. Moving forward, suggest cash/vouchers?

Thebathneedscleaned · 21/12/2021 07:49

Is the issue that its the wrong size, that it's hideous or its cheap? Your post isn't quite clear.

I do prefer that people buy my DC clothes in the size up TBH. Both my DC grow quickly and clothes are lucky to last them six months even now they're older.

You're allowed to say your DC doesn't like it if they don't.

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Christmas Families
Biggreenduffel · 21/12/2021 07:50

I would say that your son loves them thank you but they’re too big, so can she give you the receipt please so that you can change them to the right size? Take it from there

normanthegonk · 21/12/2021 07:50

He will grow into it, or ask for receipt to get the right size. ...or do you just not like it as it's neon yellow. .what do u mean you won't let him wear it?

Returnoftheowl · 21/12/2021 07:52

I guess if asked your sister would say he can grow into it.
But I'd use this experience as a benchmark for gift giving to her family in the future, you now know what level of present/spend she is expecting (as I'm sure she would never come out and say she expects expensive presents for hers whilst buying yours unsuitable stuff)

Legoisthebest · 21/12/2021 07:52

Just say it doesn't fit and have they still got the receipt so you can swap it and if yes swap it for something else. If no just donate to a charity shop. Shame your child doesn't get a present from his auntie but that's her fault not yours.
(She on the other hand is probably wondering why her child now has a 'luxury' coat because I should imagine her child already owns a coat)

MrsTimRiggins · 21/12/2021 07:54

Few issues here I think.
One, no, it’s not rude to say that the tracksuit unfortunately doesn’t fit your son. Why would it be? Such is the risk when buying clothes for other people.
Two, you seem to have vastly mismatched expectations from presents. Yours sound wildly over the top and expensive, and hers sound of a much lower budget… and of terrible taste. Nothing wrong with her having to budget differently to you, but you do sound rather angry about it. Before next Christmas, maybe suggest vouchers, or perhaps a list, depending on how they are received within your family.

UserBot · 21/12/2021 07:54

I think it is!
My friend once sent something back to me from Spain and asked me to get it in a smaller size. I never did. I was working full time ffs.

ApolloandDaphne · 21/12/2021 07:56

Why ask to change it for a smaller size if you hate it and will never let him wear it? Charity shop or and buy him something you both you and he likes.

Eredoor · 21/12/2021 07:57

Just take it to the charity shop and buy him something else, maybe a luxury coat.

WarmWinterSun · 21/12/2021 07:59

Just accept the gift graciously as your son will grow into it eventually, and spend less on their gifts next time.

Alarmset · 21/12/2021 07:59

Perfectly reasonable to ask if it can be exchanged for the right size, not so much to complain that it's cheap and hideous.

Your presents do sound OTT, had you not got an idea of what is usually spent?

crosbystillsandmash · 21/12/2021 07:59

I'm howling at the idea of small children looking thrilled and delighted at the sight of overpriced sportswear.

Don't children skip any present that feels like clothing Grin

MintJulia · 21/12/2021 08:01

No harm in asking for the receipt so you can swap for the right size.

She won't send it to you, so you can send the item to the charity shop without qualms.

StarryNightSky26 · 21/12/2021 08:02

No idea on the coat and jumpers but with three sons I know all too well the costs on football kits and Adidas stuff.

Your issue sounds a lot more about the fact you spent £100-£200 on each of your sisters kids and she spent £10 on yours.

Maybe your sister just doesn't have the money you do?

asnippersdream · 21/12/2021 08:03

@crosbystillsandmash

I'm howling at the idea of small children looking thrilled and delighted at the sight of overpriced sportswear.

Don't children skip any present that feels like clothing Grin

Mine certainly open anything that feel like clothes last!
IKnowAPlace · 21/12/2021 08:03

Did you discuss budgets for gifts? As others have said, use this experience as a benchmark. If you have vastly different budgets, it's fine to spoil your family but your DC may find it confusing when they get poor gifts by comparison.

SD1978 · 21/12/2021 08:04

I assume the issue is the price disparity too. Was this previously discussed? Do you usually give extravagant presents and she usually doesn't? The size itself isn't an issue- he'll grow into it. It sounds the issue more is the actual gift.

IbizaToTheNorfolkBroads · 21/12/2021 08:04

It feels like you and your sister need a bit of clarity on your present buying budget! Are you much better off than her? That’s a massive discrepancy in what you’ve spent on each other’s kids.

But no, not rude to exchange clothing that doesn’t fit. That doesn’t really sound like the issue though, or you’d have accepted the track suit to grow into.

GoodnightGrandma · 21/12/2021 08:05

I would be asking for the receipt.

Corbally · 21/12/2021 08:06

@crosbystillsandmash

I'm howling at the idea of small children looking thrilled and delighted at the sight of overpriced sportswear.

Don't children skip any present that feels like clothing Grin

I still remember my disgust at clothes presents.

OP, the over the top description of what you gave your sister’s children and the fact that you looked up the price of your sister’s ‘hideous’ present (which you say you wouldn’t ‘let’ your son wear, anyway?) sounds like there’s some kind of backstory.

Eredoor · 21/12/2021 08:06

A tenner sounds more than enough to spend, do DC usually want a luxury coat

StarryNightSky26 · 21/12/2021 08:06

I'm howling at the idea of small children looking thrilled and delighted at the sight of overpriced sportswear

You're either lucky in that you don't have sporty kids or you have young/no children...ime every 7/9/8 year old boy I know would be thrilled with a football kit!

MajorCarolDanvers · 21/12/2021 08:07

@Biggreenduffel

I would say that your son loves them thank you but they’re too big, so can she give you the receipt please so that you can change them to the right size? Take it from there
This is exactly what you should do.

Crikey though OP you get extravagant presents for your niece and nephew.