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Original poster

Why am I feeling homesick at home??

54 replies

StormInAGinGlass · 12/12/2021 21:01

I can't seem to stop this horrible homesickness feeling whilst I'm actually at home or around family etc nothing seems to make it better.

I don't know why I feel like this or how to make it better but it's this lump in my throat, pit of my stomach feeling that won't go away.

I've been to visit parents, family etc. Things are ok at home with my partner, I have a couple of friends and nothing has changed with them. I just feel very very strange, sort of lonely, homesick is the best way of describing it.

Has anyone else ever felt like this and how did it go away? I've tried talkjng to my partner about it but he seems to think it's because we have things on the house to sort out. I'm not convinced it's that.

OP posts:
Original poster
StormInAGinGlass · 13/12/2021 20:44

Wow I'm honestly overwhelmed with your replies, honestly I haven't been able to articulate it until now and to know other people understand is incredible.

I'm so sorry to those who feel it too and suffering anxiety and depression, it's hit home that it might be this.

OP posts:
Original poster
StormInAGinGlass · 13/12/2021 22:49

@PumpkinCrumble I know exactly what you mean and I do believe it may be a form of anxiety

OP posts:
Original poster
StormInAGinGlass · 13/12/2021 22:49

@PumpkinCrumble I know exactly what you mean and I do believe it may be a form of anxiety

OP posts:
Original poster
StormInAGinGlass · 13/12/2021 23:00

@RosieLemonade it's worth a try I've been trying it today! That is sad about your mum and actually a really similar situation to mine.

@BananaPant sorry you are feeling awful, I also have gad it is just strange that despite this diagnosis a while ago it is only relatively recently that Ive been feeling this way. It normally comes out in different ways.

@senorafridgidaire oh I understand a little better now, yes that emptiness is exactly it. That would make sense with everything going on!

@Cooperjay that must have been quite a lonely feeling, interesting that someone said it was anxiety. I do believe this could be a massive part of explaining it.

@Hen2018 yes I definitely think it sounds along these lines now.

@MistySkiesAfterRain I'm not sure, I normally love the winter a lot more than the summer but that uneasiness you describe hits the nail on the head. Sorry you have these feelings.

@Knockoneofftheshelftowin I'm so sorry you have felt like this, thank you for your reply. Hopefully it's reassuring that others understand and associate it with depression and anxiety- as horrible as that is just even understanding it is very helpful.

@Fr0thandBubble the thirst thing yeah! Let me know if it makes you feel better, it's a horrible feeling and hope you feel better soon! It is so weird isn't it.

@Ceramide I think knowing this will help massively now thank you, I hope you are ok and supported with the depression.

OP posts:
cathg1971 · 08/06/2022 22:29

Bit late to the conversation but I found this because I was googling "why do I feel homesick when at home"...it's a weird feeling

FayeGovan · 08/06/2022 22:35

I feel the same

Glitteryjelly · 08/06/2022 23:46

Can't believe I've found this thread tonight while at browsing on Mumsnet. I've felt this way on and off throughout my life and never understood why. I suffer from anxiety too but never realised this feeling may be connected to that but now it makes sense as others on here have explained it. It's a horrible, lonely, isolating feeling in my experience, almost like I'm a stranger in my own home. Hard to put into words actually. Thank you for this thread

Glitteryjelly · 08/06/2022 23:47

Sorry to hear others feel the same though, even though I'm glad I'm not alone (if you see what I mean)

Nevernottrying · 09/06/2022 00:01

I have suffered with this on and off my whole life , it’s often prevented me from going away and enjoying activities. The times I have experienced it at home have been the start of a severe bout of depression. It really does help to know other people actually understand. I’ve never told friends as I’m so embarrassed and ashamed. My husband and adult children know and are very supportive. They see it as just a small part of me and we work around it when necessary.

Glitteryjelly · 09/06/2022 00:04

Sorry to hear you feel this way too. With me it's causing me to become almost agoraphobic (sp?) some days where I feel abnormally attached to the house and feel too anxious to leave, even though I feel weird when I'm home. Very confusing!

Sunnytwobridges · 09/06/2022 01:43

I’ve felt this way since I graduated from college. I think it’s nostalgia and missing the good times of being in college and a kid.

maybelou · 09/06/2022 02:14

I get this feeling a lot, I know exactly what you mean and it's really strange to see it put into words as I've never really been able to describe it.

It's almost like you're a stranger to yourself, your home isn't your home, your feelings aren't your feelings. It's really uncomfortable and I hate it, I feel like while I'm in it I lose all emotional attachment except for knowing that something is wrong or missing, but I don't know what. Like for that time I don't love my loved ones, I don't have any of my likes or dislikes, everything is just...wrong?!

I have no idea how to stop it but had to reply as it's comforting to at least know I'm not alone and others do understand even though it's so hard to explain.

WibblyWobblyJane · 09/06/2022 02:41

ThePlantsitter · 12/12/2021 22:53

My mum always used to say you were thirsty if you felt like this.

I'm feeling like it too op, I think it's because everything's shit.

I was going to suggest that. I get anxious when I’m dehydrated.

Wallawallakoala · 09/06/2022 20:32

@cathg1971 it is so weird and unsettling
. I am surprised that others feel like this!

@Glitteryjelly it was so hard to put into words and not even my partner understood what I meant or how I feel so I know exactly how you feel about not being alone in feeling like this. Does anything help you at all? X

Wallawallakoala · 09/06/2022 20:35

Oh @maybelou that's exactly it everything feels off like it's not really me. That's why I thought initially it was post natal depression but I really don't feel like it is. It's such a strange lonely feeling, I've not told any friends but I wouldn't know where to begin with it. I had some CBT but even the therapeutic didn't really get it and just suggested it was because I had two kids and might pine for someone to look after me.

Wallawallakoala · 09/06/2022 20:37

@maybelou I have genuinely forgotten what I enjoy doing and what I get comfort from, it's almost like I've gone in a time warp from when I was a child or something with no worries to this point in time with no in-berween haha

cathg1971 · 09/06/2022 21:00

I think you've hit the nail right on the head x👏

cathg1971 · 09/06/2022 21:01

Nothing helps as such ..it just passes. My kids think I'm weirder still now 🤣

DuckonaBike · 09/06/2022 21:12

Have you encountered a poem by Carol Anne Duffy called Nostalgia? Can’t link very easily as on iPad, but if you search you can find it online. I think it describes this feeling.

antelopevalley · 09/06/2022 21:43

It is a longing to feel safe and secure.

FayeGovan · 09/06/2022 22:08

I dont feel its nostalgia . I understand that. Its more a longing for something you dont understand. Im at home with dh and dc, that i love very much, yet i just want to go home. I want to be at home but i am at home. Im not anxious. Im just longing for something i cant get or understand.
Maybe a feeling of quiet peace.

BertieBotts · 09/06/2022 22:14

This is an old thread. Would be interesting to hear if OP found it got any better?

I think what you are all describing is depression. I felt like this briefly after the birth of my second child, but it must have been hormonal as it went away again. It's a horrible lonely feeling though.

Crocsandshocks · 09/06/2022 22:18

The Welsh call it hiereith. Is there a place somewhere else you would rather be op? I known exactly what you mean. I know the place I want to live but can't at the moment for practical reasons.

fantasmasgoria1 · 10/06/2022 05:25

I have bpd and with me it's dissociation. I get it most of every day.

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