Do you ever wonder how people afford things?

[RedRobyn2021]

We're not poor, we have a little house (2 up 2 down) that us (and the bank) own, in a really nice place and we have a lovely dog and beautiful baby.

But sometimes I find myself comparing us to others around our age (I know I shouldn't)

We are so careful with money, we always have been. We own a little car which we had on finance but eventually paid off.

I know a couple younger than us in their mid 20s who live in a brand new 3 bed, with a baby and a dog, two horses, who have just had a very fancy big wedding, showing off their brand new truck on social media this morning.

Another couple I know same age as us (early 30s) have a bigger house, with two expensive cars and a baby too.

I am so grateful for what we have and I give myself a talking to often to remind myself of this. But occasionally, I will admit I secretly feel a little jealous and also like a failure, like I went wrong somewhere. How on Earth do people afford these things?

Please be kind, I know I am being incredibly materialistic, but surely I'm not alone in sometimes feeling like this?

Well they do different jobs, that pay more money.

They have investments.

They might have purchased their house with inheritance and not have a mortgage.

It’s really not hard to work out the many different ways people afford different lifestyles

Senseless getting bogged down in it though.

Pretty obviously they have more money or more debt

I just know that most people made better life choices than me, worked harder at school and got well paid jobs whereas I was simply surviving through school, college etc. It’s hard sometimes if you can’t afford stuff and others have it but I feel quite content with what I have really

I can see why others might scrutinise things more. I have a relative though who is way over the top and likes to know everyone’s finances that’s def a bit weird !

I feel the same as you, you aren't alone and in no way am I materialistic...I have a good career (psychiatric nurse) i live in a nice sized house with my daughter who is 20 and I look at other people and think how do they afford that...granted I haven't got a partner so obviously i don't share the costs of housing/bills etc
Possibly credit cards, I haven't a clue lol
Don't beat yourself up about it and don't consider yourself a failure, people may look at you and be envious of your situation..people may do that with mine also...but it is very baffling...

My guess would be they either have had help from family to buy the houses / pay for the wedding or they have have a lot of debt / finance.

In answer to your question, yes I wonder often but usually when you get to know people properly you usually find there is a lot of money worry behind closed doors and they are usually financed to their eyeballs.

Buying things on credit
Inheritance
Being a much higher earner than you realise

I think younger people particularly don’t mind getting into debt. Dh and I are in our 40s and he works with people in their 20s and the amount of debt some of them are in is staggering.

Credit
Inheritance
Bonuses
Higher salaries
Second jobs
Very long mortgages/low repayments
Investments
Parents
Premium bonds, Lottery, Pools wins

A lot of the time people pay for things like cars etc on credit, it’s a choice they make, you can choose to do it too if you want.

Or they do jobs that pay more, have family financial support or inheritance money.

I’m sure you’ll get a lots of replies telling you they’re mortgaged and in credit card debt up to the eyeballs, but there are plenty of reasons they could appear to be doing so well.

Just off the top of my head…

High earners
Been given some money by parents
Been saving since they were very young
Inheritance
Lottery win
Financial compensation for illness/injury.

Comparison truly is the thief of joy. Someone will be looking at you and wishing they had your life too.

@Chasingsquirrels

Pretty obviously they have more money or more debt

I think quite often it is more debt. Even the people who earn well. Some people see debt repayments as just another household expense.

Better paid jobs, wealthier generous parents and inheritances in my experience.

Yes. I am generally interested in people's lives and money plays a part in that.

I find the opposite too. People who I know earn well but never seem to have any money. My boss for example, I know earns £80k and DH apparently similar. When they wanted to help DS out with a deposit on a car, they had to borrow it!

People probably look at me and wonder how I live so well on a relatively modest salary. They probably assume late DH was well insured.

Actually, I was very prudent, lived well inside my means, when I had a corporate career that paid much better so the mortgage was paid off early and I have some investments. Also, apart from the mortgage, I have never borrowed anything. If I can't pay I don't buy it and over time that must have saved me ££££

New cars could be company cars or personal leases

Some people have inherited money.
Good jobs
Low mortgage repayments
Lottery wins
Loans
Credit cards
Debt.

Cars on finance, mortgaged up to their eyeballs? I live in a beautiful 4 bed house but it's rented at mates rates, I own a property that's rented out, my business pays for my car and phone and I have no debt so even on a single income I have a lot of disposable income.

You never know anyone else's circumstances and comparison really is the thief of joy

I figure people who live the high life would, more often than not, be up shit creek if they lost a job and couldn't service their debt.
They're welcome to it.

Well paid jobs

@FindingMeno

I figure people who live the high life would, more often than not, be up shit creek if they lost a job and couldn't service their debt. They're welcome to it.

I know a couple of people like this, they get twitchy every time the interest rate changes.

Perhaps the mid 20s couple you know have money from family, eg inheritance.

Well paid jobs
Help from family
Debt & cars on finance
Not paying into a pension

All of the above and families with an only child.

Inheritance therefore doesn't need to be divided.

I don’t mean to be rude, but surely you must know the answer to this, predominantly they earn more than you.

They either have better jobs or more debt OP

One of the reasons DH and I seemed comfortable compared to our peers was that we married and bought our first house young, which meant we were completely skint, but paying off a mortgage while many others were travelling and partying. By our early 40s, when some had only fairly recently "settled down" our mortgage was very small in relation to our income.