Has mumsnet changed your opinion on anything

[potentiallyme]

So many people seem so set in their ways. Have you ever changed your beliefs/opinions/actions/outlook because of something you have come across on Mumsnet.
Relationship/affairs/family/politics/work/finances? Anything at all that's made you stop and see a different point of view and take it on board?

@potentiallyme

So many people seem so set in their ways. Have you ever changed your beliefs/opinions/actions/outlook because of something you have come across on Mumsnet. Relationship/affairs/family/politics/work/finances? Anything at all that's made you stop and see a different point of view and take it on board?

Yes on relationships,.that even with kids, and years married, people can and do have affairs, and some are better than others at concealing the affairs, but at some point they make mistakes.

Love Actually

Yes- similar to a pp I’ve been on MN since I stumbled across it after a Google search as a 19 year old student- child free, still living at home.

The stuff I’ve learnt here has formed how I’ve approached everything as an adult. My relationships, career choices, marriage, household responsibilities, pregnancy, even how often I wash my bedding .

Posters here have changed how I view issues like surrogacy, prostitution and sex work, and of course the trans debate.

Mumsnet is hugely valuable as an unofficial single sex space, and I’m glad I found it that day as a 19 year old.

@Nandiniti

I've stopped trying to think the best of people that's for sure. Mumsnet opened my eyes to gratuitous wankery and taught me that quite a lot of people take pleasure in being contrary and disagreeable arseholes.

Sorry was that not what you meant.

Oh gosh

@Nel246

Surrogacy

What about it?

@spondoolikay

Mumsnet has changed me - fundamentally. The sex based rights debate, relationships, work, ageing, parenting. It has helped me understand myself and the world around me with a clarity I never had before. I feel seen and understood and that I'm part of a big movement. It has radicalised my feminism. I love it.

Yes I think this is true for me too

I used to be very pro-stay at home parenting (not just mothers to be clear).

I still am but I guess MN woke me up to the reality of needing to protect your retirement savings/financial future/career. I came from a family where marriages lasted til death and mot divorced people I knew had had amicable divorces or the wronged party walked away with a good settlement. No financial drama where one partner was left far better off. MN made me very aware of how things can go pear shaped and one partner (usually a woman) can be left with a very precarious future.

It’s not really changed my mind but it’s certainly helped me form an opinion on a few things. As others have said surrogacy and trans ideology especially.

And confirmed that many people are even more selfish and nasty than I thought before.

Came after reading something funny, stayed for the feminism.
Thanks for this thread - as a regular on the feminist boards I'm really pleased to see so many people on here who have been lurking.
Come over - feel free to ask stupid questions, I bet I asked plenty

The feminism board, not leaving washing out overnight lest it be ‘darked on’ (joking). I’ve read some really good life advice in general on here that’s made me stop and think about things in my life or how I’ve reacted to them.

Wow I really didn't expect this thread to be so much about the feminism board. Thrilled that it is! Mumsnet should be more proud of it I think.

Absolutely Appalonia in fact I've just mentioned it on the feminist boards

@JadeTrinket

The relationships board has been an unpleasant revelation. It’s opened my eyes in a depressing way to how many women are trapped in unhappy, unequal relationships because they’re deskilled longterm SAHMs with little or no access to money — and in a not insignificant number of posts on here, don’t even realise there’s any other way of living than with a surly, selfish sexist.

Yes, this.

Regarding feminism and trans rights, I was very much of the “live and let live” and “be kind” school of thought. I’ve never agreed with trans women competing in women’s sport, but thought this was something that never happened anyway.

The board has been a real eye-opener. Once I’d seen the misogynistic streak running through the trans rights movement, I couldn’t unsee it. And I’m not just thinking of the small minority who post violent threats on Twitter. It’s more about seeing “sex” being quietly erased as a protected characteristic.

I came for the Chat and have stayed because of the feminism boards.

I quickly came to see just of fragile our notions re: the security of sex based based rights are and how they are under threat in an unprecedented way.

As a pp has said, it's something you can't "unsee" once you understand what's happening.

I've often wondered what it must have been like to be part of key moments in history that shape the "now" and for the first time I feel I'm living in that space where what we do (or don't do) is going to have a profound impact on the next generation of women.

@Redshoeblueshoe

Absolutely Appalonia in fact I've just mentioned it on the feminist boards

And I've come to have a look. What a fantastic thread.

And yes, the relationships board is an eye opener, so many similar experiences - The Script. Invaluable stuff.

It occurred to me a while back that this is the biggest gathering of women in history. All talking and sharing their experiences.

Very, very potent.

Absolutely Breadincaptivity so many things were already achieved, or my help wasn't needed. Now we have politicians saying that people don't have a sex, or you can't tell what their sex is.

I say BOLLOCKS to that

I don’t really like the term privilege but boy did I realise my privileges reading MN.

Another one saying feminism. And also through that actually widening my viewpoints and accepting different opinions. I understand more why Brexit and Trump happened now and read much more widely, even though MN seems more left-leaning generally. And maybe because of this I have less tolerance of those on here who love to say how they hide the feminist boards.

The feminist board . It's truly been an eye opener .

I wish Mumsnet had been around 40 years ago. All human life is here and terrific advice and insights. Like so many others I've learned so much from the feminist boards.

There's a Chnese proverb that says
When sleeping women wake, mountains move
It's true, and that's why Mumsnet is relentless trolled and targeted by those who also know this and want to shut it down. Don't let them.

Wow Bore and Datun have come to join in - thanks you 🍷🍷🍷

(it's hot choc really)

Ok I'll send marshmallows

This is such a lovely thread to read.

I have been here for yonks and yonks and the parenting advice over the years has been brilliant but the FWR posters have literally changed my life over recent years.

I learnt that I really needed to make sure to teach my DDs to set their bars very very high in relationships (indeed they should set the bar high in all areas of their lives - employment, relationships, healthcare, interactions with society as a whole, education etc)

Women are fucked over so much in life we deserve better and need to be vocal and firm about our worth. We also need to stand together as women and support each other - again the FWR boards are amazing for this.

I genuinely believe my DDs' lives are, and will be, better as a result of all the amazing advice and viewpoints on MN - it has opened my eyes to all sorts of patriarchal bullshit and I've been able to pass on the insights to my DDs

I'm quite fond of my DSs too but I love that MN is a predominately female site and would like it to remain dominated by women for women as it's so valuable and almost unique.

(And this thread shows exactly why some topics shouldn't be hived off in a fenced off area of the site - women's rights should be fucking front and centre!)

The feminism board on here is an absolute jewel of the internet, particularly the threads around being gender critical.

Adding my vote to the feminist boards; never even really considered myself a feminist as such (more through lack of engagement and disliking of the title/labels as opposed to holding an opposing view or loving misogyny 😅) I was more in denial that it even existed… but it’s been absolutely eye-opening. The notion that the definition of woman as defined by law and protected under the equality act can be id’d in and out of Willy nilly including as a consequence things such as women prisons for “born male” sex offenders who change their gender as a grown adult and professional sports etc is very disturbing.

If the legal definition is fuzzied, chaos reigns around laws pertaining to the item until a new definition is found surely, which is currently (ridiculously) tbc as a result of this “debate”. Hence my opinions quickly formed and changed! From MN I found Twitter 😱😱😱😱😱😱

Aside from this, definitely the relationship topic - the script, grey rock and I’m always astounded at how much time and energy people put in to support and help others (strangers) through tough times.