Things I learned too late in life

[Spiceup]

No one anywhere has ever had their life improved by me wearing high heels. I now wear comfy shoes for every occasion and life is immeasurably better. I can move quicker, get more done in a day and never miss any fun because my feet hurt or I don't have suitable footwear. I don't know what on earth possessed me for so long.

What's yours?

@WarmFunKindStrong , glasses after half a century of contact lenses - what a relief!

@50ShadesOfCatholic

Think about death. Do not pretend it won't happen and that it is a great tragedy. The more you think quietly about your own death, the more sense you will make of your life, find purpose and joy. Relationships are everything, nurture them or, if you're in one that is hurting you, leave it.

Literally no-one cares what marks you got at school. Or if your child can play the trumpet/dance/run fast. Or if you only eat 800 calories a day.

If someone tells you their story, try to listen rather than judge or offer advice. People tend to know what's best for them, they just need a little space to work it out.

It's worth trying to make someone's day, each day.

Look up at the sky and notice how vast it is. We are but dots passing by.

I love this, & your name

1. You don't need to offer any explanation.

"We're going for a meal on Saturday night if you'd like to come?"
"Oh sorry, I can't on Saturday".

1. Never put toilet bum wipes next to bleach wipes.

@thecatsthecats

Making money is more important than job satisfaction.

Wait, hear me out.

There are loads of ways of making money that are unexploited (e.g. Matched Betting, online trading etc). But kids are encouraged to go headlong into job and career paths early rather than focusing first on making money to set themselves up in life.

But I earned a fair whack, and can now "retire" from the money making career at the grand old age of 32 and pursue work I'm more interested in. My mortgage is massively paid down and I have substantial savings, so I can afford to retrain and do a more interesting role.

My complaint is that I could have earned a LOT MORE money than I did, and set up my investment incomes much earlier. See it as a sort of liberation of the rest of my life.

I'm going to help my kids earn and invest from age 18 to give them maximum freedom of choice later in life.

Amazing! Any tips on investing for us mere mortals?

Something I learned just yesterday.
Daughter is a nurse just started working with alcoholics in a rehab ward yesterday.
Alcohol literally pickles your brain as well as your liver ( one of her patients is learning how to walk again). Many have brain damage. People who drink every day are on a slippery slope.

Yes alcohol kills brain cells. I remember being told that in the 6th form . However, having a glass of wine every night is not going to land you in rehab!

Thank goodness for that (she says, typing with right hand while left holds a glass of rather nice red).

@Ladyindahoose

Trust no-one.

The only person that really has your back is you.

People lie even when they say they are not.

Other people do not give a *k, so why should you?

Love many

Trust Few

Paddle your own canoe.

(I have said this to my kids so often!)

@Cocogreen

Something I learned just yesterday. Daughter is a nurse just started working with alcoholics in a rehab ward yesterday. Alcohol literally pickles your brain as well as your liver ( one of her patients is learning how to walk again). Many have brain damage. People who drink every day are on a slippery slope.

Alcohol doesn't literally pickle your brain. Pickling preserves or cleans something, usually involving vinegar or salt water.

@LanaDelBoy thanks for that explanation.
Regardless, search " pickled walnut brain" and look at the MRIs.
Certainly interesting!

I think the problem is the (mis) use of the word literal - the brain hasn’t been literally pickled. If it has it would have been submerged in vinegar.

But the effect can look like pickling? Am I right?

Looks like you are saying alcohol literally atrophies the brain. That is scary - I hate the thought of anything atrophying.
(Now I want pickled onions...)

Yes I misused the word literally!
Sorry everybody .

@Cocogreen

Yes I misused the word literally! Sorry everybody .

@Cocogreen

no, you didn't.
The dictionary definition of "literally" has been changed some years ago to allow it to also mean "figuratively" when it's used for emphasis!

it's nuts, but it's true.

I learned that I’m ok. Actually I’m more than ok... I’m fucking hilarious. I went from hating myself and apologising for even entering a room, feeling sorry for even daring to take up space on this earth- to absolutely loving myself. I don’t know what changed. I can still be socially awkward but inside I love that my intentions are good. I never mean to harm or hurt anything. I learned way too late that I’m a good person. I’m enough. I wish younger me had known that.

@georgarina

Not too late, but it's better to pursue your own interests and strengths when it comes to a career, not think you have to do something conventional.

I was always very artistic and gifted in the arts but was discouraged by my parents because that wasn't a 'proper' career, so I limped along doing jobs I wasn't good at or interested in because I thought that was the only way I'd have a proper career.

As soon as I abandoned that and did what I was actually good at, my career finally started.

@georgarina, good on you, and I'd love to know how you eventually started your REAL career.

Sorry folks, I don't want to derail the thread. But I do think Georgarina's experience might be useful to people thinking of a new career or of developing a dormant talent. We all like reassurance that it's never too late!

groovergirl Wed 10-Nov-21 01:59:27

georgarina

Not too late, but it's better to pursue your own interests and strengths when it comes to a career, not think you have to do something conventional.

I was always very artistic and gifted in the arts but was discouraged by my parents because that wasn't a 'proper' career, so I limped along doing jobs I wasn't good at or interested in because I thought that was the only way I'd have a proper career.

As soon as I abandoned that and did what I was actually good at, my career finally started.

@georgarina, good on you, and I'd love to know how you eventually started your REAL career.

Sorry folks, I don't want to derail the thread. But I do think Georgarina's experience might be useful to people thinking of a new career or of developing a dormant talent. We all like reassurance that it's never too late!

Yes this is so true. Thank you @georgarina,

[quote supermoonrising]@beachtosunset
Thank you that is encouraging to hear. Was hoping to travel but then we had lockdown one month later. Would love to travel and teach adults business English. Maybe i will do it online from home?

Better to do it in person (with demo classes) but online is better than nothing. Basically I felt there were two elements to the course: learning about your own language (all the Grammatical terms and stuff) plus gaining the confidence to get up and teach in (and how to do so effectively).[/quote]
@supermoonrising Sorry for late reply i kept scrolling back and not find your post . Thank you for taking the time to post. This is useful feedback. Definitely food for thought. Have had some 1:1 teaching experience. I did the classrom experience weekend course now the online part to complete. Definitely need to go back over the nuts and bolts grammar stuff. scuse th typos, typing one handed late at night! thanks again.

p.s love your username. spookily timely. Astrology fan here, new moon this week in Scorpio. Time for new projects! It's all meant. All the best, beaches

When you go to an interview.....your interviewing them as much as they are you....Will they make a good boss,do the hours suit me and will I be happy in this job?

Sorry, but I hate it when people spout that bullshit. It might be true for some highly skilled people, but it's not true in general.

It is not bullshit. Any time I go to an interview I am judging the people interviewing me - if I think something is off, or don't think I would like to work for them then I wouldn't take the job if offered. It most certainly is not a one way street.

I agree about the interviewing too. If they behave like you'll be lucky to get the job and not at all that they'll be lucky to have you, I don't want to work there.

The interview is as much for them to sell themselves to you as the other way round. I once turned down a job because the interview panel did nothing to put me at ease, in fact seemed to want to make me uncomfortable. I knew the person who took the job and I made absolutely the right decision, based on what came next for them.

@spiceup i agree, not having a degree, i used to feel, oh all i have to offer is enthusiasm, hard work, honesty, positivity, integrity, good customer service.... i used to turn myself inside out. Employers did used to take such advantage of me.

And never being late, never being sick...
Took me years to understand employers are lucky to have me.

Middle class parents making me feel like a loser for not having a degree :-/

"It is not bullshit. Any time I go to an interview I am judging the people interviewing me - if I think something is off, or don't think I would like to work for them then I wouldn't take the job if offered. It most certainly is not a one way street."

Yes, of course, unless you're unemployed and the Job Centre know you're at the interview, you can always turn it down. That doesn't mean you're interviewing them in the same way they're interviewing you. Next time, try having the interview at your home with 3 of your friends on your side of the table, asking them 90% of the questions and giving them a test and let me know how it goes (unless of course you are highly skilled and being head hunted).

Yes, of course, unless you're unemployed and the Job Centre know you're at the interview, you can always turn it down. That doesn't mean you're interviewing them in the same way they're interviewing you. Next time, try having the interview at your home with 3 of your friends on your side of the table, asking them 90% of the questions and giving them a test and let me know how it goes (unless of course you are highly skilled and being head hunted).

I am unemployed, but the job centre don't know I'm at any interview (not in the UK). Why are you banging on about having the interview at home - they don't interview me at their home - and I have only ever been interviewed by two people, usually one, and I've never had to pass a test. I am not highly skilled, and have never been headhunted, but I'm too old to be made to feel they are doing me a favour. I am interviewing them in the same way they are interviewing me, and I can ask them any questions I feel are necessary. You seem to have a chip on your shoulder.

Those saying that you're also interviewing the employers aren't wrong in some circumstances but it's a very privileged position to be in. A lot of people are desperate for employment or a change in employment and would take the job no matter what.