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Original poster

School runs are killing me, what can I do?

230 replies

Redovwrcoat · 27/09/2021 08:57

I'm 21 weeks pregnant and have a 9 year old ds.

His school is just under a mile walk door to door. We used to walk, no problem but now I am really struggling. I am heavy, my back hurts, I struggle for breath and I feel sick all the time. I have other complications that make it a daily struggle. It's only going to get worse.

There is a way we can go via public transport but it inolves 2 buses. They are unreliable and neither bus stop has seating. I'm struggling to stand for any length of time.

I don't drive although I've passed my theory recently and am waiting for lessons.

My dh drives and on the days he's not on early or doesn't have to drive his dc to school (they go to another school) he takes my ds but that's few and far between.

I'm new to the area so don't know anyone who could help. I feel awkward asking the school mums. Maybe I could pay them to pick up and drop off?? Is that a thing?

Can't really afford cabs every day

I am hoping someone comes up with a magical idea that I haven't thought of, because I can't take much more of this.

😭

OP posts:
Stormyequine · 27/09/2021 08:59

Can you hire a mobility scooter for the next few months? I'm not sure how much they are, but it would certainly solve your issue if they are affordable.

ReeseWitherfork · 27/09/2021 09:01

Instead of looking for an alternative to the school run, can you focus on easing your physical ailments? Maybe spend some time googling or speak to the midwife. I'm sure there is no magical cure but I'm wondering if swimming or pregnancy yoga might help.

Lovelydovey · 27/09/2021 09:03

If he’s 9 - year 5 - could he walk on his own? Ours are allowed to walk at that age, and a number walk more than a mile crossing several roads. My 9 year old walks just over a mile albeit I have given him a phone with a tracking app on it.

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mdh2020 · 27/09/2021 09:03

There must be other mums who live near you who would be happy to help you out? I used to bring my DDs friend home from nursery and then school every day and her mother repaid me with bottles of wine! Have you thought of advertising on your local What’s App group? People do that in this area all the time. Maybe there is an older teenager or retired person who could help out?

RedskyThisNight · 27/09/2021 09:05

I'd second the 9 year old walking on his own, unless it's a very dangerous route. He'll probably meet up with others for at least some of the way. Totally normal for Year 5s to be walking that sort of distance to school on their own.

DownWhichOfLate · 27/09/2021 09:05

Post on your local Facebook page. There may be a local parent / childminder who can do drop off. Or even a college student. If it’s under a mile walk it should only take around fifteen minutes for them to walk.

Original poster
Redovwrcoat · 27/09/2021 09:05

Mobility scooter...hmm. That's an idea I'd have to look into cost. And also storage.

And also try to get my 9yo (who is already embarrassed to be seen with me!!) on board..so to speak!!

I swim at least 3 times a week and started yoga last week which I hope will help. A lot of how I feel is down to my blood sugar level which I am trying to get under control with diet and insulin. I feel faint a lot of the time. I have an apt with my midwife in weds...

OP posts:
Fubitch · 27/09/2021 09:06

I'd definitely speak to the school in the first instance. Just say you have pregnancy related health issues and were hoping they could help you find a solution.

LittleLottieChaos · 27/09/2021 09:06

I feel your pain. Our childminder is a mile away…we can’t drive, and we live on a sodding hill. It’s tough, but I do try to grab the bus part of the way and just hope he doesn’t expect carrying. So at least the 9 year old walks! (I’m 30 weeks). Remember, this is just temporary.

Mariell · 27/09/2021 09:06

Depending where you live there should be other children walking the same route all or part of the way and at 9 he should be able to walk to school on his own and be safe as there are other children and parents walking the same route.

IntermittentParps · 27/09/2021 09:06

Can he walk with a few friends?

GoWalkabout · 27/09/2021 09:07

Is there a local childminder (like in your street) that does the school run and has capacity (would be a miracle) or advertise for a home help to do this, aiming at sixth form students or retirees. Although honestly taxi might be cheaper. Speak to school maybe? See if they have an idea of anyone you could pay.

endofagain · 27/09/2021 09:07

Does your DH actually need to be driving all day, or is he taking the car to work and leaving it parked all day?
Can you share the car more efficiently/ can he use public transport?

Withgasoliiiiine · 27/09/2021 09:10

You don't mention additional needs and he will know the way by now, would you be happy to let your DS go on his own? A mile there and back at 9 should be reasonable unless it's a particularly risky route

fruitandflowers · 27/09/2021 09:10

Can you get your DH to drop you near the school early and then go and have breakfast/coffee together in a cafe nearby? Then you can get the long buses home.

You also need to talk to your DH. At the end of the day if you can’t walk there is no magic solution and he will need to step up / do things differently.

nzeire · 27/09/2021 09:10

Talk to the school. I’m in a school office, and we just want kids to be there. Often I’ll run up to a corner to meet a mum… sometimes have picked up kids whose parents are struggling. Our dp asks around and get other parented to help. Good luck.

rainbowandglitter · 27/09/2021 09:11

Could you cycle? Or maybe a tricycle if a normal bike is too much.

Original poster
Redovwrcoat · 27/09/2021 09:11

He's 9 but he's in year 4, literally just turned 9.

He would love if I said he could walk alone. But the route is too dangerous. There are 2 main roads and a long road leading up to thw school with many, many crossings. It's always really hectic with traffic and I have to be honest...I don't trust ds to look both ways when crossing. His head is in the clouds. I tried walking behind him once, to see how he got on...and he nearly got run over. It gave him a proper fright, and me, and the driver. I don't know if he's ready.

I am on a WhatsApp group with the school parents. Perhaps I can ask on there. What would be the going rate?? I don't want to take the piss

OP posts:
DumplingsAndStew · 27/09/2021 09:12

@endofagain

The OP doesn't have a licence.

Original poster
Redovwrcoat · 27/09/2021 09:13

I will speak to the school

OP posts:
Original poster
Redovwrcoat · 27/09/2021 09:14

No way could I cycle! I tried doing it when I wasn't pregnant and I hated it 🙈

OP posts:
RobinPenguins · 27/09/2021 09:17

Scooters? Adult one for you?

Stickyblue1987 · 27/09/2021 09:17

Can your dc go to breakfast club and your dh drop off?

Original poster
Redovwrcoat · 27/09/2021 09:18

Dh has just started a new job and it requires him to travel from school to school most days, all around London. Some days he doesn't start so early do he'll drive ds early for breakfast club.

If he's able to wfh he does all school runs with ds. But its not often as he needs to be on site.

There are days he has to take his own dc to school, outside of London, so he leaves too early even for ds to be dropped to breakfast club.

So you see its all a bit hickldy pickldy and I wouldn't have any clear set days I'd need help. It's a bit of a mess isn't it.

OP posts:
Smartiepants79 · 27/09/2021 09:18

The mobility scooter is actually a really good idea and your son would just have to get over his ‘embarrassment’ and support his mum.
Could you walk him just part of the way and then he walks on his own?? Meet a friend part way there?

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