What would it take for you to never visit your adult DC again?

[Wookydook]

What would your adult DC have to do / change in their life for you to never visit their home again? Assuming you had been going to their house perhaps once a month/every 2 months. Discounting the pandemic and hypothetical transport issues - what would be a "deal breaker"?

We have snakes and there are a few people that refuse to visit but sadly not my parents, if we got a spider my mother would no longer come over 🤔.

I can understand if someone has a extreme phobia of something (dog, snake etc….) but I’m sure a arrangements can be made for said animal not to be in the room when they visit, although my snakes are in the living room and I can’t really move them but I do offer to cover them up with a sheet if someone is really scared of them.

Is it a cat with an Alexa sellotaped to it?

A massive waving light up snowman that stays up all year?

I'm not the previous poster and my parents don't help us out financially. Not guilty! Only guilty of being sure this one detail about my life that I share with 25% of the population is terribly outing!

I appreciate that a cat that climbs on the counters and licks the butter or a dog that chews people's shoes are cute to nobody but the owner. But parents have not visited so cannot (should not?) assume pet is a menace to health and hygiene. And I like to think they have known me long enough to say "could pet be put in a different room when I drop by?"

@Wookydook

Parent has a phobia of a different creature which I have known about all my life. Obviously if I got one of those I'd understand the refusal. Genuinely parent has never expressed a strong opinion about any other creature before.

Well I guess they're expressing it now?

It seems extreme to not visit but it must basically be a phobia or an extreme dislike. I think that's understandable really.

@ClawedButler lol!! Killer combo

Before you said it was to do with something you bought I was going to ask if you'd recently started 'living in sin'. DM is religious and for the 15 years I lived with ex and then now-DH, she came up with the most ridiculous excuses not to visit. It was only when DH and I got married and she started making plans to visit I cottoned onto what the 'real' issue was!

Sex-swing hanging from the ceiling?

I'm not keen on those Goldfish with the googly eyes and wattles? Or a Swan, they sound nice but my mum used to have a caravan in a park with a lake and the swans roamed the area and hissed at you menacingly for breadcrumbs. I still visited but it was a bit off-putting.

Some people really dislike dogs - and if your parent is one of those, or if your dog isn't well trained I can see how they might not want to visit, assuming you can meet elsewhere.

My mother wouldn't visit again if I had a rat/snake/spider.

Physical violence, or them banning me. Hopefully it will never happen.

Man bat?

Pampas Grass in a huge clump in your front garden? The pink variety.

Even well behaved pets can provoke strong reactions.

I cannot bear being leapt up at; sniffed or (god help me!) licked. Even if an animal doesn’t come near me, often the smell makes a visit unappealing.

Sitting on a sofa covered with hair or finding one on my plate would be enough to make me really struggle with another visit.

Lion?

www.boredpanda.com/pet-lion-neil-roar-tippi-hedren/?utm_source=google&utm_medium=organic&utm_campaign=organic

@Galassia yes it's a lion 😂

Have you and your husband become naturists?

Actually there was thread ages ago where a posters dad was naturist and she was asking on here about her children going round to visit!

I updated up thread - it's a pet. Cat/dog basic pet
I understand what people are saying about poorly trained pets being off-putting. Parent has not met the pet.
And that a strong dislike is a reason not to visit. Parents visit other houses with cats/dogs.
And that maybe I should have known parent didn't like these pets. Whenever we asked for a pet as children the reason given for not getting one was always lifestyle - two parents working, small garden, nobody home during the day etc. Never "I have a mortal fear of cats".

Aww Neil the Lion is exactly like a giant house cat. That photo of the housekeeper stepping over him as he lies in the kitchen

DM will never visit our house again. She's prone to a bit of drama. We've cats that she maintains she's allergic to. She isn't. She just hates cats and assumed that we would get rid of them when she said it. I'm not going to euthanise my son's pets due to her dislike of cats!

They are outdoor cats who would freak if you tried to bring them indoors so there's no cat dander on the furniture and never has been.
DH actually does get an allergic reactions to cat dander and he's never had any symptoms of an attack, so I know the house is fine - and if she's that allergic to the point that standing in the middle of my living room caused 'her throat to close up' within seconds of arriving, then even standing near any cat lover in a shop would theoretically finish her off.

Meanwhile, I solicitously am very mindful of her 'allergy' and ensure that we always freshly changed and hands washed after any animal petting before going near her, for her safety obviously.

Anyway, I assume she'll do a rethink when it's my turn to have her for Christmas again, but it will be hard to do a u-turn having bitched to the entire family that my 'house full of cats' nearly killed her.

People can develop fears and phobias over time.

I wasn’t fussed about stick insects but I met one recently and I didn’t like it.

Cut the parents some slack.

I avoid houses with dogs, apart from a couple of friends who automatically put their dogs away for visitors. Not a drama, we just meet elsewhere.

You aren't the poster with the skunk doing a name change are you OP?