Miss Mrs Ms

[DinosaurDiana]

I know we’ve had this discussion before, and I said that I wish we had one title for women like men. I was told we do - Ms, but I’m not that fond of it. To me it says left on the shelf female, but I’ll no doubt be told that that is my own prejudice !! It’s actually from having older, unmarried teachers at school.
However, I am going to use it on unofficial things like my Tesco and Next account to change my own attitude.

I’m a Ms and I’m not on the shelf or curmudgeonly
intrigued by your left on the shelf notion?is it so bad to be single as a female? Or are you going the whole shelf and inc unmarried women

I use all three on a frequent basis. I’m married and didn’t change my surname.

I use Ms. I’m married and didn’t change my surname, and much prefer Ms (it suits m the raging feminist in me ☺️)

I use Ms, I'm married but I don't think my marital status should be announced in my title. I'm hoping to swap it for Dr. in a few years.

I use MS I don’t want tell the world if I’m married or not. It be funny if men started having to address mail as
Mr Joe blogs (who’s not married)
but we do it for women.

I’m an out and proud Mrs! I’d people use Ms it really annoys me.

I'm a Ms, always have been. Married, no name change.

I'm also puzzled as to the left on the shelf thing. To me Ms is the logical answer to strangers (companies, organisations etc) asking about your martial status. Basically, in my head it just means 'none of your business, why on earth would you ask'.

I quite often use 'Wing Commander' and 'Reverend Doctor' when given the option in drop downs.

My personal favourite is 'Dowager Duchess' - thanks, Fortnum & Mason (I bought a hamper as a gift once - ONCE! - but they keep sending me stuff. My postman and I enjoy it, though, so I'm not stopping it. grin])

Ugh, I hate incomplete HTML.

Left on shelf is such a tutty expression, reeks of disapproval. Funny in that us pure ancient thing to say, usually whispered with an accompanying side eye

@bendmeoverbackwards

I’m an out and proud Mrs! I’d people use Ms it really annoys me.

As long as the same title is used for all women I don't care what it is.

Either Ms or Mrs is fine by me. I just want women to be treated the same as men without any link to marital status, which is irrelevant.

@LadyJaye

I quite often use 'Wing Commander' and 'Reverend Doctor' when given the option in drop downs.

My personal favourite is 'Dowager Duchess' - thanks, Fortnum & Mason (I bought a hamper as a gift once - ONCE! - but they keep sending me stuff. My postman and I enjoy it, though, so I'm not stopping it. grin])

That's fabulous, I'm so going to look to buy something from F&M just for that!

To me it says left on the shelf female, but I’ll no doubt be told that that is my own prejudice !! It’s actually from having older, unmarried teachers at school.
Yes. Very prejudice and obvious internalised misogyny. Whats wrong with not being married? Left on the shelf means you think not being married is a negative thing. What’s wrong with being an older unmarried teacher? Do you think all women should aspire to marriage?

In my place of work we are all Ms, unless someone specifically asks for mrs.

I use Ms cos it's no obes business whether I'm married or single , or anything in between.
How do you know your teachers were single? 🤣 I had teachers who used Ms who were married or in long term relationships.
I think you've carried a teenage assumption/attitude into adulthood. Might be time to update.

For every women’s who’s “proud” I’ve made it lucky me I found love of my life got married happy every after. There’s someone who never had that and resents having to tell everyone who asks “sorry I didn’t make the cut I’m spinster/on the shelf/butt of jokes”.

Either Ms or Mrs would be fine for me too, so long as it was for all adult women and not linked to marital status.

How do you know your teachers were single? 🤣
How do you know they weren't lesbians?

I've been a Ms since 17/18 and I'm 50 now, married with a family. Ms is the only option as far as I'm concerned, cannot understand why we still use Miss and Mrs.

@bendmeoverbackwards

I’m an out and proud Mrs! I’d people use Ms it really annoys me.

So am I.

Doesn't a wedding ring show you are married anyway even if you call yourself Ms or do there not wear them?

I’m Ms but very often find it changed to Miss on documents and official things, I always register as Ms. It happens so often that it can’t be a coincidence. I’m starting to wonder why I bother.

Why bother with titles at all? Other than professional titles (captain, doctor, professor..)

I can report F&M no longer have dowager duchess or even duchess on their title options, their default is madam though which I rather like, The Lady seems like a decent option too.

This is why it was worth years of studying hell to get a phd and use the term Dr.
I can’t bear judgements about marital status

I have to ask at work and I hate asking, not sure why! You can have whatever you want though on our system from sir to lady to duchess so take your pick
I asked one woman who said "god I hate titles, just stick me down as Sir, that'll confuse people" made me laugh all day

The only person I ever knew that was a Ms was a lesbian teacher who got very angry if she was called anything other than Ms - so I always thought Ms meant you were a lesbian :-D