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Original poster

My husband died suddenly today

478 replies

vickibee · 06/07/2021 01:57

And I don’t know what to do. It has not sunk in yet and I only know it happened at work around noon.
I don’t know if there is anyone up to talk to I just feel I need some human contact

OP posts:
Eachpeachpears · 06/07/2021 02:12

Oh bless you, sweetie. Unfortunately, it's bound to effect your DS but that's ok. Keep talking to him and loving him as I'm sure you do and you will get through this together.

Eeyoreswigwam · 06/07/2021 02:12

He sounds like a really lovely man. I am so sorry.

Original poster
vickibee · 06/07/2021 02:12

I had some crumpets this morning but I haven’t eaten since. I can’t. Just seem to have had lots of tea.

OP posts:
notangelinajolie · 06/07/2021 02:13

@vickibee

Yes my sister was here all afternoon, illegally as she was contracted by track and trace to self isolate. My mum is 86 so can’t really help much. My friends also came to help. I have the worst headache Our son has he asd and I am so worried this is really going to affect him
I'm the first in line to stick by rules but hell no - sod track and trace.
veryblearyeyed · 06/07/2021 02:13

I’m not surprised you have a headache. Try and have regular sips of whatever liquid you can face. Shock and grief always make me very thirsty for some reason.

One minute at a time is the only suggestion I have. I wonder if you can get a melatonin prescription to help you through the first weeks. It feels wrong to sleep but without sleep you just can’t function. Sending love and support

Eeyoreswigwam · 06/07/2021 02:14

Maybe try a couple of dry crackers and a paracetamol?

Original poster
vickibee · 06/07/2021 02:14

It is ironic he has just completed a new shower room, it looks amazing.
And landscaped the garden from an overgrown mess. I really don’t know how I am going to do stuff without him

OP posts:
Tiari · 06/07/2021 02:16

This is just awful. So, so sorry Vickibee
Try to keep talking on here until you hopefully can manage a little sleep xx Flowers

Exunctly · 06/07/2021 02:16

He sounds wonderful. This must hurt so much. I’m sorry you found out the way you did. You sound like you’re holding up really well.

Original poster
vickibee · 06/07/2021 02:16

She wore a mask and had negative LFT.

Another point is no wills , you just don’t think about it do you?

OP posts:
veryblearyeyed · 06/07/2021 02:16

He sounds very special.

Don’t worry about how you’re going to do stuff yet. You’ll have a full plate looking after yourself and DS and dealing with the shitty admin. Flowers

Original poster
vickibee · 06/07/2021 02:18

He also had a temper on him, Jekyll and Hyde we bickered a lot, we weren’t one of those agreeable couples.

OP posts:
notangelinajolie · 06/07/2021 02:18

Maybe drink some tea
Yes tea, drink tea.

He sounds like a lovely, kind, amazing husband and father. Hold onto that thought - he will keep you strong Flowers

KurtWilde · 06/07/2021 02:18

I'm so sorry vicki, what an awful shock. He sounds like a wonderful man.

Have you taken something for your headache?

Original poster
vickibee · 06/07/2021 02:21

The police returned his belongings including his smart watch, it shows the exact time his heart stopped. It is weird to think that hours earlier he was wearing it.
He worked for a city council doing reapairs on tenant properties and he loved his job even though it was difficult

OP posts:
JaneJeffer · 06/07/2021 02:21

I'm sorry to read this Thanks

Original poster
vickibee · 06/07/2021 02:22

Took some paracetamol earlier, there is a pile of crumpled clothes on the bed, that he has worn and I can smell him on them.

OP posts:
Boomisshiss · 06/07/2021 02:22

How is yours son has he managed to stay asleep

OddestSock · 06/07/2021 02:23

I'm so sorry for your loss xx

Original poster
vickibee · 06/07/2021 02:23

You are all so kind with your messages.

OP posts:
bowchickawowwoww · 06/07/2021 02:24

I'm so sorry to read this. Take any help offered right now, and don't be afraid to ask for it either. Your husband sounds like a great man. I'll be thinking of you Thanks please try and have a slice of toast... Or even a sweet cup of tea. Don't make yourself unwell. Sending a massive virtual hug xx

Original poster
vickibee · 06/07/2021 02:24

DS IS 14 and he got off to sleep about an hour ago. He asked if he could stay in our room with me.

OP posts:
PattyPan · 06/07/2021 02:25

So sorry that you are going through this Flowers
He sounds like a wonderful husband who loved you very much. Would it help you process your feelings if you got a pen and paper and wrote it all down? Memories of him, feelings etc.
Don’t worry about wills for now unless you are dependent on money from an account in his sole name and need it immediately, since you were married it will go to you as next of kin anyway. Just focus on getting through the next few days, eating/sleeping.

KurtWilde · 06/07/2021 02:25

Toast is a good idea if you can manage it, with a cuppa. It'll help those paracetamol get to work on your headache.

Your brain must be reeling, please be kind to yourself.

notangelinajolie · 06/07/2021 02:26

Bless you, I can't imagine how you must be feeling right now.

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