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Original poster

I think my Husband is dying

816 replies

DollyParsnip · 25/05/2021 19:11

Hi

DH had a planned surgery on Thursday which went wrong; he had a catastrophic bleed which lead to his chest being opened and a long time to stabilise. He's on full life support but they are very, very concerned that he has few signs of brain activity.

He's in a good hospital with an amazing team around him, we didn't expect him to last over Thursday night and they've kept him going but I am slowly realising that I think he's gone.

Fuck. What do I do without him? We have an 11 yo DD who is awesome and friends but I feel so alone. So much panic.

Sorry for unloading, just feels incredibly surreal.

Message from MNHQ - Please read the OP's updates before posting on the thread. Thank you.

OP posts:
Honeyroar · 29/05/2021 19:45

I’m so, so sorry to read that. Wishing you lots of strength.

frustratedwiththepandemic · 29/05/2021 20:18

So sorry for your loss OP , you sound so very strong I am in awe. Lots of love

RealhousewifeofStoke · 29/05/2021 21:23

So very sorry Flowers

rockingthelook · 29/05/2021 21:26

My thoughts and prayers are with you and all your family, very sorry to hear of your awful news

samandpoppysmummy · 29/05/2021 21:39

@DollyParsnip I was so sad to read your update and I'm so sorry for your loss.

My lovely DH passed away the day after Boxing Day in 2019, when my DC were 12 and 14. I was also able to be with him at the end, which is a big comfort to me.

When you feel ready, there is an organisation you can join called Widowed and Young. Their Facebook group has been a great source of support to me.

Sending you and your DD lots of love xxx

Cottagepieandpeas · 29/05/2021 22:14

Very sorry to read your story. Thinking of you and your family Flowers

PermanentTemporary · 29/05/2021 22:21

Thinking of you all and your loss. Flowers

IamaBluebird · 29/05/2021 22:53

So sad to read this , very sorry for your loss Flowers

adeleh · 30/05/2021 02:00

I am so sorry. Thinking of you and your girl.

MistyMinge2 · 30/05/2021 07:12

I'm so sorry. Sending love and condolences ❤️

Original poster
DollyParsnip · 30/05/2021 08:14

Thank you all for your kind words and your support. Telling DD was the worst thing I have ever done, absolutely heart breaking, but I am pleased it came from me and it wasn't rushed or panicky.

She's had a few panicky moments, one was where she said she was worried I'd get depressed and harm myself and who would she live with then and another was about money. She keeps asking if I'm ok but it's all understandable.

Ugh. Thank you for your suggestions of resources and agencies that could provide practical support too, I think they will be amazing in the coming weeks and months.

Onwards and upwards today xx

OP posts:
MummyJ12 · 30/05/2021 08:22

Thinking of you at this very difficult time. I’m so very sorry @DollyParsnip sending love and deepest sympathy for you, your dd and all of the family xx Flowers

BlueGlasses · 30/05/2021 10:09

I'm so so sorry to read this. I know I was holding onto hope for you. Wishing you and your DD all the best x

rainbowstardrops · 30/05/2021 10:15

It's such a heartbreaking situation. I would suggest contacting your daughter's school as they may have a counsellor or play therapist etc to help her process what's happened.

gagrag · 30/05/2021 10:20

I'm so sorry OP, my thoughts are with you & your daughter.

LemonJuiceFromConcentrate · 30/05/2021 13:53

Oh OP. I’m so sorry. Thinking of you and your DD. Flowers

MB58 · 30/05/2021 14:33

So sorry to hear of your loss. Thinking of you and your DD x

lifeturnsonadime · 30/05/2021 14:36

Dolly my thoughts are with you and your DD.

Having lost a seemingly healthy parent unexpectedly and suddenly this anxiety on the part of your daughter is completely normal. She may well become extremely clingy and worried that something awful will also happen to you.

My suggestion is that you contact a charity such as Winston's Wish to help her navigate her feelings.

Sending you strength and love. I can tell from your posts that you are going to be fine, don't forget to take care of yourself too though xx

TracyBeakerSoYeah · 30/05/2021 14:54

Was hoping for some good news but so sorry for your loss
Thinking of you & your DD Flowers x

Cleverpolly3 · 30/05/2021 14:57

So very sorry to read this.
Sending you and your daughter love ❤️ Flowers

peachgreen · 30/05/2021 16:36

I'm so sorry Dolly. When you're ready please do come and join us on Widowed And Young. You'll find a supportive community of people who understand - as much as one can ever understand someone else's pain - what you're going through. I lost my DH in October - our DD is 3 - so I can't give you much advice, but I can promise you it will get easier to carry. The grief comes in waves and those waves eventually start to get further apart. Sending you both so much love and strength. Flowers

80sPadme · 30/05/2021 17:12

I am so sorry for your loss Dolly.
Thanks

abouquetofsharpenedpencils · 30/05/2021 17:13

I am so so sorry to hear your heartbreaking update.
Sending you strength at this time Flowers
X

Ginger1982 · 30/05/2021 20:12

I'm so sorry OP. I lost my own dad at 13 after a short illness. Your DD will be devastated. Please make sure that she has an outlet to express her feelings and look into some counsel for you both after this horrendous shock Thanks

MerylSqueak · 30/05/2021 20:18

I'm sorry for your loss.