I think my Husband is dying

[DollyParsnip]

Hi

DH had a planned surgery on Thursday which went wrong; he had a catastrophic bleed which lead to his chest being opened and a long time to stabilise. He's on full life support but they are very, very concerned that he has few signs of brain activity.

He's in a good hospital with an amazing team around him, we didn't expect him to last over Thursday night and they've kept him going but I am slowly realising that I think he's gone.

Fuck. What do I do without him? We have an 11 yo DD who is awesome and friends but I feel so alone. So much panic.

Sorry for unloading, just feels incredibly surreal.

Message from MNHQ - Please read the OP's updates before posting on the thread. Thank you.

Thinking of you and your family,Dolly.Love and prayers for you all ❤️

Thank you for the update. It all sounds desperate. It’s great that you have such confidence in the consultant, that must help. I continue to hold you in my thoughts. 💐

You are very much in my prayers 💐💐💐💐

@DollyParsnip Sending you strength and hope.

Thank you for the update.

So sorry for what you’re going through, OP.

You sound so amazingly strong. You’re incredible. Keep your pecker up. Thinking of you.

@DollyParsnip Have been thinking of you. Sending strength and love

Sending thoughts and prayers your way.

I'm so sorry for what you're going through OP. My husband died two years ago when our DDs were 14 and 12. I'm keeping everything crossed that your DH makes a recovery. Please look after yourself.

Thinking of you and your family x

Sending you and your family lots and lots of love xxx

Stay strong

Thinking of you and hoping for good news for you all. X

Thinking of you, so sorry you are going through this xxx

Thinking of you , your DH & DD . Sending you love, strength and hope at this distressing time 💐

Just sending you all my positive thoughts for you and your family. I can tell from your messages that you will be strong enough to cope with whatever may come

I feel your pain. How terribly heartbreaking for you. You’ve got this. You’re stronger than you think. Life is often hard but it’s imperative you ask for & embrace all the love of family & friends to help you get through this. Love is strong.
Your husband feels you & knows you are there. Have faith.

Wishing you and your family all the best xx

So sorry

Sending you, your DH and DD love & good wishes.

Not the same situation but I have had DH on life support when the DDs were 8 & 6 when we were on holiday in the USA. The doctors weren't sure he'd make it and suggested preparing the DDs as they said children who are prepared for the worst tend to have better outcomes, so I did and it was the hardest conversation. As it happened, my DH recovered and after a week in ICU and a week on a ward, he was well enough for us all to fly home. His abdomen was open for all the time he was in ICU. He's fine now.

I found keeping a diary really helpful and would write it in the small hours when the DDs were sleeping in the hotel room and I was wide awake. Because I had nobody to leave them with, the DDs were allowed to go into DH's room to see him and became quite good at reading the information on the monitors: "oh Daddy's sats are up today" and the like. They seem to have emerged unscathed. The nurses and doctors were simply brilliant in every way. I agree about speaking to a chaplain even if you aren't religious.

Thinking of you DollyParsnip. Such an extreme time for you. A hand hold across the ether

Being stable is good. There is still hope, no matter how brutal the words and situation seem. One step at a time. I hope your pils are not adding to your load and you have others rallying round.

So proud of you and your dd DollyParsnip. I really hope you get good news soon .