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Original poster

Does it make someone a LGBTQ ally if they wear the pride lanyard but object when a transgender person uses their restroom ?

793 replies

thecatmother · 11/05/2021 20:29

In my workplace we are very open and inclusive and many colleagues chose to wear their IDs on the Pride lanyards and are very active participants in all the Pride related events.
So far so peaceful, or so I thought, we had a new colleague joining recently, it is a lady who is transitioning from being born a man. She is very polite and just gets on with her work and day. I wasn't surprised to see her using the Ladies, unfortunately a number of my colleagues have formed an opinion about that. The management has been supporting the new colleague, and they held "conversations " with the complaining parties.
However, those people are still wearing their Pride lanyards, I can't get my head around that. The lanyards are purely on volunteer basis, we have generic ones. I generally wonder whether they actually realise that being an ally is not about getting drunk on Pride , but actually to be supportive to the people of LGBTQ.

OP posts:

NailsNeedDoing · 11/05/2021 21:00

They can be supportive of gay rights being no different to anyone else’s rights without wanting to share their sex segregated toilets with someone who is the opposite sex.

VaccineMcQueen · 11/05/2021 21:03

@HavelockVetinari

And me and me!!

Campervan69 · 11/05/2021 21:03

True. I am very supportive of gay rights. But believe that sex segregated spaces should be just that. And that no-one presenting as the opposite gender has actually changed their biological sex. Therefore 3rd unisex spaces make more sense for the dignity of all concerned.

RufustheBadgeringReindeer · 11/05/2021 21:03

I would imagine that only strengthens my point...

Fairs

HouseOfGoldandBones · 11/05/2021 21:05

I would consider myself to be an ally of the LGBTQIAA+ movement.

That doesn't mean I want to share my single sex spaces with males, irrespective of what gender identity those males may have.

Those single sex spaces are no longer single sex if they are used by both sexes. They become mixed-sex spaces, which for privacy, dignity & safety I am opposed to.

RufustheBadgeringReindeer · 11/05/2021 21:06

@Campervan69

I'd like to point out that my post that got deleted was nothing more than a biscuit. What is offensive about that?

Its ridiculous

Biscuit means no comment

Its a valid emoji

Unless MNHQ decides it doesn’t mean no comment anymore and its an emoji they don’t like

I’m waiting for someone to take offence at then it’ll be open season

Aunthe · 11/05/2021 21:06

Campervan69 I was just wondering about that. I loaded this thread not long after it was posted, some really non offensive responses, a biscuit etc. Had to go and do boring real life things, came back, reloaded and watched comments and your biscuit disappear. Why?

RufustheBadgeringReindeer · 11/05/2021 21:08

Wait are we back to deleting yawn again?

I’ll wait for a bless...

borntobequiet · 11/05/2021 21:08

Are toilets now to identify as restrooms?

RufustheBadgeringReindeer · 11/05/2021 21:09

You’ve got to have nerves of steel to post on some of these threads

You never know whats going to be considered delete worthy next

Jongleurterre · 11/05/2021 21:10

I’m not up with all the modern terminology regarding such things and have no desire to be. I think if this arrangement was foisted upon me when I used to work I would have strongly objected.

FromHereToModernity · 11/05/2021 21:10

MN is eating its own emojis

Snugglepumpkin · 11/05/2021 21:11

I 100% support LGB rights & would defend them if required.

I 100% do not support any of the other letters or think they have anything in common with LGB.

I 0% support the idea of men in the womens toilets.

Campervan69 · 11/05/2021 21:12

It's very sad to me how women are having to waste so much time fighting to maintain existing rights. In the fact of such hatred and bigotry towards them.

MsFogi · 11/05/2021 21:13

There is a whole world of difference between supporting LGB rights/being an LGB ally and supporting the whole TQAlphabetSoup agenda. Unfortunately the Pride flag/lanyards now seem to demand that everyone drink the KoolAid and support the T+ agenda. The women in your office have every right to have an opinion about a man being in their single sex spaces and to talk to the management about their concerns and expect to be listened to and respected.

WouldbeVa · 11/05/2021 21:13

I’m a flag flying lesbian. I don’t want males in my toilets thanks.

RufustheBadgeringReindeer · 11/05/2021 21:13

@FromHereToModernity

MN is eating its own emojis

Its very tempting to make my way through them all and see what i get deleted for

(I’ll put money on glitterball but im not taking the risk)

annacondom · 11/05/2021 21:15

I do feel a bit sorry for people like your colleague. She wants to fit in, keeps her head down, wants to be a woman. Doesn't want to use the blokes' loo, and to my mind, shouldn't have to. If I were her colleague it may make me feel uncomfortable, but what exactly would I have to fear from this person?

MsFogi · 11/05/2021 21:16

@Snugglepumpkin

I 100% support LGB rights & would defend them if required.

I 100% do not support any of the other letters or think they have anything in common with LGB.

I 0% support the idea of men in the womens toilets.

This with glitter balls

Original poster

thecatmother · 11/05/2021 21:16

I am clearly extremely naive, as I didn't realise the range of emotions this would bring. I just understood everyone being under the same umbrella. I need to educate myself on the subject.

OP posts:

Nonmaquillee · 11/05/2021 21:20

@Snugglepumpkin

I 100% support LGB rights & would defend them if required.

I 100% do not support any of the other letters or think they have anything in common with LGB.

I 0% support the idea of men in the womens toilets.

I 100% agree with you 😆

Campervan69 · 11/05/2021 21:21

I stopped going to gay bars years ago as I was so uncomfortable using the ladies toilets which would be inevitably full of drag queens But I thought that was their territory in a way so I just removed myself from the situation. Similarly we stopped going to another local bar as they had mixed sex toilets. I was able to vote with my feet and go elsewhere.

In work however, I would expect my desire for a single sex female only toilet to be accommodated.

Changemusthappen · 11/05/2021 21:22

Just tell your firm, who I would be willing to bet money on have mostly men in management, that if a man can use the womens toilets then it works the other way.

I think things have potential to change very rapidly and until this starts to impact men so they sit up and take notice, womens rights are going to continue to be eroded at a fast pace.

I never understood why the police were called at the bathing pools in London since the women were just using the mens pool because they identified at men. Why did they get removed when the transwomen were allowed to continue to use the womens pools?

overnightangel · 11/05/2021 21:23

Very harsh to delete a biscuit, for all we know the may identify as , who is anyone on here to judge?