Have you ever been to a wedding where someone was jilted?

[JamesMiddletonsMarshmallows]

Me and my friend tonight watched a (so bad it's good) film where a bride jilts the groom and he runs off with her sister as they sing a Cher song together we were discussing jilting, she said at Uni her friend's wedding was called off the night before when the bride had discovered an affair. And I remember as a teen my parents coming home only a couple of hours after they left for a wedding. The groom didn't show up to the service, he was seen leaving the hotel in the car of a woman waiting outside is jilting very rare? Have you ever known anyone jilted or a wedding cancelled last minute?

I worked with a couple who were due to marry abroad. We all knew the groom to be was a serial cheat. A couple of our friendship group went to the wedding.

The couple insisted everyone booked 2 weeks in the same hotel, her parents foot the bill for almost everything. Both families out there. They were getting married in the second week.

In an excessive drinking session four days in the groom's brother outed the groom as a serial cheat (he'd actually got two OW pregnant weeks apart). Cue a huge family brawl, distraught wife to be and sheepish groom everyone stuck in the same hotel for the next 10 days. Wedding obviously didn't go ahead but they did marry the following year in a massive church do. A few kids later and they're very, very divorced because he couldn't keep it in his pants.

My brother’s fiancée dumped him 2 weeks before the wedding. I’d been helping her paint the house and she’d asked if I thought she was doing the right thing. Of course I said yes, I had no idea she was trying to get me to say no. She was pregnant by someone else.

My fil used to play the organ in a beautiful rural church and he always joked that he told the grooms his little sports car outside had the keys in if they wanted to do a runner!

My brother was invited to a party because the bride had called it off the day before. Her parents had paid thousands for all the food so they just invited friends of their other kids to come enjoy themselves.

No idea what happened to the young lady. Believe she’s happy now.

I agree with PP that the enormous expense, convoluted arrangements and huge guest list of some weddings won't help. Marriage is about the long term, not the wedding day.

I have read actual psychological studies which have shown that the success of a marriage is pretty much in an inverse relationship to the amount of money spent/ fuss made.

As you say - people who marry for the right reasons (love; a desire to commit to each other; a desire to offer the other party legal protection in the event of death etc) tend to spend less (in actual terms, not just as a proportion of income) on the wedding and have a good chance of the marriage lasting; those who marry for the wrong ones - a big show/ perfect day etc spend much more - and have a significantly lower chance of the marriage succeeding.

I admit I got married knowing it would probably end in divorce. Even the vicar asked jokingly during the wedding if he should carry on with the ceremony. My sister had left home to live with her boyfriend, which tore the family apart on several levels. My mum even said to me I didn’t have to go through with the wedding but I think part of me was doing it to escape my parents. They weren’t abusive just not very good at parenting.

I was prepared to work at the marriage and to begin with we were genuinely happy. But he was a bit of a mummy’s boy and really wanted someone more conventional than me. I think he resented me working in a media-related industry. So gradually the wheels came off, we were neither of us very nice to each other, I behaved badly and then I left him. He was very hurt but ultimately I think he became a better person.

We didn’t stay in touch though it was awkward because my BIL was his best friend. I was forbidden from going to his funeral.

Later on I did reconnect with his mum, she was a lovely person, I think she knew it wasn’t all my fault and I was able to visit her until she passed.

Been with my current DP, unwed, for 20+ years, 2 teens and mostly happy.

And as my wedding was done on a shoestring so I don’t feel too bad about my dad paying for it.

And name changed in case outing

@Panjandrum123, that’s fascinating. Why was your sister living with her boyfriend so controversial? Are you from a very conservative background? Are you saying you married someone you knew wasn’t suitable to please your parents? Couldn’t you have just left home and lived alone or in a house share — wasn’t that possible?

And what was so obviously wrong during the ceremony that the vicar asked if he should continue?

[quote Wabe]@Panjandrum123, that’s fascinating. Why was your sister living with her boyfriend so controversial? Are you from a very conservative background? Are you saying you married someone you knew wasn’t suitable to please your parents? Couldn’t you have just left home and lived alone or in a house share — wasn’t that possible?

And what was so obviously wrong during the ceremony that the vicar asked if he should continue?[/quote]
@Wabe my dad was very conservative in his later years. When my sister left home he said he’d disinherit her and I was referred to as the only daughter. He wrote to DSis’s boyfriend’s parents saying BIL was a cad and a bounder etc etc. And also wrote to BIL to threaten him.

The comment from the vicar was definitely in jest, he was a lovely man, and knew me as the unbeliever from the church youth club. I think I was probably interrupting him so he had to shut me up. It certainly got a laugh.

Ironically DSis & BIL got married shortly before me and are still very happy together.

I think I probably married my ex-DH as much because my parents saw him as unsuitable as to escape them. My mum is a social climber and in her eyes we’ve both made disappointing choices, even though she likes DP he’s not really good enough.

And yes I should have left home and shared a flat and saved us all much heartache.

@Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g

One anecdote to contribute. 30+ years ago a colleague was getting married. I remember us all standing around one day wishing him well. He was given a card and probably a present from the department. He didn't look radiant, but he wasn't really that type of person, so I didn't think too much about it. He was marrying his long-term girlfriend. They'd been living together for several years.

I was young and naive then, so I was absolutely flabbergasted to learn a few weeks later that very shortly after the wedding he'd left his new wife. He'd been having an affair for months with a colleague in another department. Same as many others on this thread - his fiancee and family were totally caught up in the wedding arrangements and he just couldn't summon up the courage to tell her it was all off.

Dreadful thing to do to another person. I often wonder how it worked out with the OW, as I believe they moved in together.

Last year my friend’s colleague’s (massive, expensive) wedding had to be cancelled due to COVID. A few months on he was in a relationship with another colleague. God knows how, during lockdown but they’re living together now so there you go!

Never in my personal experience, but I can think of a few occasions when I wish it had happened, to have avoided a lot of problems in the future!

MrsSmith2020

Yea me! Called off wedding 2 hours before the ceremony!

@lcoxhey

Yea me! Called off wedding 2 hours before the ceremony!

tell us more!

all credit to you though for having the guts to pull out. I think it does take a lot of courage, but it is definitely better than going ahead if you know it is not right.

Over 20 years ago, I was pregnant & living abroad.
It was never going to work, so bailed out & moved back home 3 days later

@Brondie319

No but 8 years later I've learned my husband and father of my children has been having an affair with my sister for at least 12 months, does this count?? 💔

Really sorry

Bore off daily fail 🙄

@teaandcustardcreamsx It was inevitable really… but it’s such lazy journalism on their part.

Obviously a slow day on the celeb news trail.

I can never understand people calling it Daily Fail/Snail/Trail etc and then posting from it - you obviously are clicking on the site yourself to know about the article so why then make out it is so awful??

@TopBlogger indeed! Given that the DM regularly gets loads of journalism awards, sells quantities the Gruniad can only dream of, is hilarious that it is actually read by those harrumphing lefties that choose to disparage its readers - oh the irony!

When I came on MN I didnt actually believe that the daily mail wrote about MN users until I saw it with my own eyes. Now this one too, I find it pretty pathetic and hilarious.
This isn't news, it's a bunch of strangers writing crap on the Internet.. which may or may not be true.

A highlight for me was one of my responses featuring in the DM, I think I wrote it when I was slightly tipsy with a touch of sunstroke. I couldnt belive that a jorno from DM saw it as something to include in an article.

Everyone can access MN with a click on Google? Why the need to write stories?.. this is whole new thread now, lol. I just find it bizarre and fascinating that we are "news"

Any one of us could be writing total twaddle.