Does anyone else think that the Harry & Meghan show isn't going to be that explosive?

[HelloThereMeHearties]

I really doubt that loads of dirt will be raked, or muck spread. I'm guessing that there will be a few "it was hard to speak" type complaints, which the media will blow up, but that it's not actually going to be as exciting as we're all being led to believe?

@OldRailer

The wedding three days before was surely the rehearsal? Or am I missing something?

I think it was some sort of personal vows thing. Not a legal wedding.

Re the question of "what should we do about women entering the RF". I'm an ardent feminist, but I'm tempted to say - nothing.

If a grown woman is entering a centuries old institution which is based on a strict set amount of people having the privilege of wealth, adoration and protection their whole lives, not earned but simply by the pot luck of being born to the right people...an institution which upholds class disparity and oppression of the masses..an institution whereby they may not be able to lead a 'normal' life, but certainly will never have to worry about money, will have staff waiting on them, nannies galore and the hardest days work they'll ever have to do is shaking people's hand, and get millions in return....then TBH I'd rather be off fighting worthier causes. Like period poverty, domestic violence, the gender pay gap, the epidemic that is violence against women, etc.

Feminism isn't about fighting the mild inconveniences that come to the extremely privileged and elite. Especially when they willingly enter into that lifestyle, kitted out in £3,500 dresses while women elsewhere are escaping financially abusive marriages with her kids and a tenner in their pocket. I know who needs us more.

@JamesMiddletonsMarshmallows, bloody well said.

The entitlement is sickening.

@JamesMiddletonsMarshmallows

Re the question of "what should we do about women entering the RF". I'm an ardent feminist, but I'm tempted to say - nothing.

If a grown woman is entering a centuries old institution which is based on a strict set amount of people having the privilege of wealth, adoration and protection their whole lives, not earned but simply by the pot luck of being born to the right people...an institution which upholds class disparity and oppression of the masses..an institution whereby they may not be able to lead a 'normal' life, but certainly will never have to worry about money, will have staff waiting on them, nannies galore and the hardest days work they'll ever have to do is shaking people's hand, and get millions in return....then TBH I'd rather be off fighting worthier causes. Like period poverty, domestic violence, the gender pay gap, the epidemic that is violence against women, etc.

Feminism isn't about fighting the mild inconveniences that come to the extremely privileged and elite. Especially when they willingly enter into that lifestyle, kitted out in £3,500 dresses while women elsewhere are escaping financially abusive marriages with her kids and a tenner in their pocket. I know who needs us more.

Couldn’t have put it better myself 👏🏻 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻

As my post was deleted I'll clarify to @PicsInRed - nobody once expected you to worry about the racism undoubtedly hurled at Meghan Markle to lead to white woman being unable to accuse black men of rape.

But there is a VERY REAL narrative at the moment whereby if a whitle person criticises a POC for anything unrelated to their skin colour, the white person is not only a liar but racist. And who do you think they come for first? Women. I've seen so much criticism around "Karen's" allegedly "falsely accusing black men of rape". We know false accusation are so rare they're negligible, yet when a white woman like me makes the accusation what happened - you jumped on me to twist my words. Is that OK?

BTW I never did or would report my mixed race rapist, because I was six years old and though I know who he is, historic rapes are harder to report and I full believe it would be detrimental to me to watch him be acquitted and me be labelled a liar. But then I was probably a racist child who made it up as part of my racist agenda, yes?

Wondermule
I said if she had been silent, the outcome would’ve been better. Don’t you think?

Not that she should be silent because it is inherently the right thing to do in the face of such unfair scrutiny.

I'm lost a little, is what you mean,
On one hand your saying she shouldn't be silent when facing unfair scrutiny.
Yet on the other, you're recommending she should should be silent so it'll all blow over.

Is that right?

I said if she had been silent, the outcome would’ve been better. Don’t you think?

That's always true of women and minorities, right? It would be so much more pleasant if they would just keep their opinions, their accusations, their demands for fair treatment and parity to themselves. Not pleasant for the victim, of course. Just for those who choose to attack and abuse them.

A victim's silence is never the right and just solution. As they say "No justice = No peace".

@minou123

Wondermule I said if she had been silent, the outcome would’ve been better. Don’t you think?

Not that she should be silent because it is inherently the right thing to do in the face of such unfair scrutiny.

I'm lost a little, is what you mean,
On one hand your saying she shouldn't be silent when facing unfair scrutiny.
Yet on the other, you're recommending she should should be silent so it'll all blow over.

Is that right?

I’m saying staying silent isn’t the ‘morally right’ option (in that she should be able to speak out if she wants to), but that if she had, she would’ve saved herself a lot of the (even more) brutal coverage she is getting now.

It’s a bit like having a neighbour dispute - the more you argue with them/take them to court, the worse your relationship gets. You shouldn’t have to move house morally, but sometimes it is just the less stressful thing to do.

@PicsInRed

I said if she had been silent, the outcome would’ve been better. Don’t you think?

That's always true of women and minorities, right? It would be so much more pleasant if they would just keep their opinions, their accusations, their demands for fair treatment and parity to themselves. Not pleasant for the victim, of course. Just for those who choose to attack and abuse them.

A victim's silence is never the right and just solution. As they say "No justice = No peace".

No I’m talking about the royals only.

Anyway having spoken out, is Meghan faring better now?

@JamesMiddletonsMarshmallows. Bravo and I think you cut right to the heart of what bothers people most about this pair. Other people live lives of unimaginable luxury and privelege too but these two seem to specialise in both feeling sorry for themselves while also preaching to others about service and compassion. In order to not be so annoying, they need to either

• go ahead and live the life of unimaginable luxury but stop whining and preaching to others.
• whine away but stop living off the back of the life you walked away from. So Meghan go back to acting, Harry to soldiering or maybe working as a paid worker in a veterans charity.
• live as ordinary humble people and preach away.

They want to have it all ways while seeming to have so little to offer themselves, that's what gets my goat

JamesMiddletonsMarshmallows

I believe that a terrible crime happened to you as a child, I don't believe that challenging racism will impede your ability to make an allegation which will be believed (though I do believe that misogyny and a general antipathy toward child victims quite wrongly would).

Most women would believe you. Most women know how the world works from first hand experience and wouldn't doubt you or believe that you were a racist simply because the perpetrator of the crime committed against you happened to be a different race to you.

I can see that this is a very sensitive topic for you - understandably so - so I'm withdrawing from further discussion - I wish you well.

Wondermule
I’m saying staying silent isn’t the ‘morally right’ option (in that she should be able to speak out if she wants to), but that if she had, she would’ve saved herself a lot of the (even more) brutal coverage she is getting now.

Got you.
Meghan should have expected more brutal coverage because she chose to speak up and not stay silent.

As you put it "she could have saved herself".

So your solution is for her to be silent?

How did Meghan know Kate was called 'Waity Katey' if she didn't know anything about the Royal Family?

@PicsInRed with respect, it's not about 'most women would believe me'. I know that. Its not what I seek in this case.

It's about any one single person who would challenge me as a white woman, call me a liar and accuse me of racism, if I exposes the man who did this. I mean they'd probably call me a liar anyway, but it's a double blow to be called a racist too. This IS happening - and it usually men, it ties in with incel culture too. It would only take one person with that narrative to stop a woman in her tracks taking her story to the police. And men get away with it, yet again. The implication that POC can't be challenged on ANY grounds for anything lest the challenger be racist has so many dangerous knock on effect you would even think of. This is just one of them.

Anyway having spoken out, is Meghan faring better now?

I've no doubt she feels relieved at having spoken out in answer to all the horrible, relentless and ridiculous accusations leveled at her. People may not believe her account but nevertheless she has got her side out there and there's catharsis in that.

Do I believe Meghan suffered from racist attitudes from the press and from within the palace? Absolutely. Do I think this caused her and Harry distress? Absolutely. Do I think she was unprepared for what life as a member of the Royal family? Absolutely. On all those counts she has my sympathy.
But complaining that they were financially cut off from huge wealth while still being hugely wealthy and expecting sympathy for that? Absolutely not. Tone deaf in the current times.
I

@PicsInRed

Anyway having spoken out, is Meghan faring better now?

I've no doubt she feels relieved at having spoken out in answer to all the horrible, relentless and ridiculous accusations leveled at her. People may not believe her account but nevertheless she has got her side out there and there's catharsis in that.

Okay. And what do you make of the allegations she is a bully? I assume you support her accusers speaking out as well?

The investigation into her when they haven’t publicly claimed an investigation into A and Epstein is disgusting.

Exactly!! can't people see the double standards

How is that a double standard. They're not law enforcement. Do you expect the families of all those accused of crimes to undertake their own internal investgations into family members and their friends as well and to then make their findings publically known? What a ridiculous thing to think.

However they are obliged, as an employer, to investigate any claims of bullying within the workplace should one of their employees raise a grievance, however disingenuous those accusations and the timing of them may be. Are we now saying that UK Employment Law can be swept under the carpet when it is inconvenient.

@minou123

Wondermule I’m saying staying silent isn’t the ‘morally right’ option (in that she should be able to speak out if she wants to), but that if she had, she would’ve saved herself a lot of the (even more) brutal coverage she is getting now.

Got you.
Meghan should have expected more brutal coverage because she chose to speak up and not stay silent.

As you put it "she could have saved herself".

So your solution is for her to be silent?

No. You are now conflating what I want to happen with what would logically happen. You know exactly what you’re doing in manipulating what I say. But I’m sure it is clear to others that aren’t desperate to twist my words.

@derxa

How did Meghan know Kate was called 'Waity Katey' if she didn't know anything about the Royal Family?

While I do think it’s unrealistic that she knew so little about the royal family, she could easily have found this out later. I’d be surprised if she was aware of uk tabloid headlines about Kate in advance.

The interview was shocking. Harry and Meghan can't even get their stories straight.

Okay. And what do you make of the allegations she is a bully? I assume you support her accusers speaking out as well?

If they want to put their names to complaints and enable Meghan the right of reply - as any normal HR case would entail - sure go for it.

I'd like to see what Meghan reported to HR. Who was named in that complaint and do any of the names coincide?

I bet they do...

oh lordy. I thought this was Chat, not AIBU.

it comes to something when women can't even agree that racism and rape are equally bad rather than slugging it out over who is a bigger victim. what a depressingly low bar.

@PicsInRed

Okay. And what do you make of the allegations she is a bully? I assume you support her accusers speaking out as well?

If they want to put their names to complaints and enable Meghan the right of reply - as any normal HR case would entail - sure go for it.

I'd like to see what Meghan reported to HR. Who was named in that complaint and do any of the names coincide?

I bet they do...

They may have put their names to complaints to BP (I don’t know), I wouldn’t expect that to be made public though.

@PicsInRed

Okay. And what do you make of the allegations she is a bully? I assume you support her accusers speaking out as well?

If they want to put their names to complaints and enable Meghan the right of reply - as any normal HR case would entail - sure go for it.

I'd like to see what Meghan reported to HR. Who was named in that complaint and do any of the names coincide?

I bet they do...

But Meghan didn’t complain to HR did she? She went to Oprah - a luxury that any potentially wronged staff do not have, as they do not have her privilege.