I mean - how does that even work? Your child refuses to open a laptop when told to and - what? You accept defeat, walk away and the child's life goes on as normal?
A lot of it IS down to parenting. Making your child do the things they don't like, for their own good, is essential. If you fail to do that, that's not great
Unfortunately, like it or not, this is what it comes down to.
A 14 year old kid can throw their attitude and weight around and will do so. You still have to give boundaries and ultimatum and spell out consequences. Its your job.
Or you have to accept that the school are going to, and have a duty of care, to start asking questions / getting involved in ways that you potentially might not like or agree with. OP doesn't like this. OP thinks she can have it both ways.
Thats where I run out of patience. If you can't / won't do it, then authorities will step in if you don't step up in someway. If the kid thinks its ok for their parent to be fined there is obviously a problem here too with attitude. At this point compassion etc doesn't come into it.
The OP has said she doesn't get out of bed because of her other child so they all sleep late. Well thats fine to a point - provided you do actually do the work, but she is using that as an excuse. If schools were open, would that be acceptable? "Oh Im sorry Johnny was late for school because of his little brother not sleeping again". And certainly in the world of employment it wouldn't watch. Yes we are in lockdown and yes things are tough and things are different but that doesn't mean we can stay in bed. The OP is enabling this and saying this is ok and has, by her own admission, said this to the school. Wtf does anyone expect to happen? This isnt coming from the kid - this is the parent. How are the school supposed to interprete this as anything other than the parent being lazy? Parent manages to get the family up when school is open.
The conversation about 'agreeing to be flexible' seems to be the school wants child to get up, but parent doesn't want to so enables child to stay in bed so school agree to another approach but op says its not acceptable etc etc.
Then we get
If I do that he then says well how can I do my work with no Internet. If he says to the school I tried to do some work but mum turned the Internet off.
Its another "well i dont really like that option" rather than getting on with it.
It reads as soft, dismissive and can't be arsed.
I do get that there are plenty of parents genuinely struggling but this isn't one.
This is a parent enabling, then denying they are enabling, a kid who is being difficult. Parents need to lead by example. That means getting your own arse out of bed on time rather than starting negotiations with the school about it on behalf of your child.