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Original poster

Tell me the best/worst backhanded compliments you've had...

211 replies

GappyValley · 11/02/2021 14:32

You know, the ones where it's either such a bad insult that it becomes a compliment, or such a bad compliment that it is an insult...

Mine has to be when my bitch of a stepmother (and self-appointed amazing baker who loves to criticise everyone) told me I shouldn't feel bad for not being able to stick to my gluten-free diet, when we were eating some birthday cake I had made.
Well fuck you, SM, it was gluten free cake and you clearly didn't realise which is why you thought I was falling off the wagon...
The fact that she didn't notice was the highest honour my cooking has ever had!

DH was told it was nice of him to try to make an effort with his hair, and that wasn't so bad considering it was lockdown - he had queued up for hours on the day barbers reopened for a proper cut

OP posts:

paisley256 · 12/02/2021 23:49

You could be a model if you lost weight! From a work colleague.

All the men in here fancy you but I can't make up my mind if your glamorous enough!
Another work colleague - yep the arrogance is breathtaking.

allycat4 · 13/02/2021 00:25

A taxi driver told me I looked like Linda McCartney and then added "she was no beauty but she had her moments". I was in my 20s, and offended. Now I look back and think she was lovely!!

stampsurprise · 13/02/2021 09:07

@allycat4

A taxi driver told me I looked like Linda McCartney and then added "she was no beauty but she had her moments". I was in my 20s, and offended. Now I look back and think she was lovely!!

She was! Which means you are too 😍

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General food

Yellowfiledredfilled · 13/02/2021 09:16

My sister (A) told my other sister (B) - you'd be a good looking girl if you just lost some weight. We take a lot of delight in sister (A) now being the only overweight sister - we know that's wrong but she was horrible...still is.
I was told by a guy at work that I was the kind of woman that men loved to hang out with but would never want to date - think I was a bit into being a 90's ladette at the time.

timtam23 · 13/02/2021 13:18

I was in my first week of uni, my flatmates and I (all female) had gone to the Freshers' Ball to see a band along with another group we'd made friends with (all male) it all seemed friendly but one of the lads (who I didn't feel any affinity with/attraction to at all) suddenly awkwardly put his arm around me and started trying to snog me...I pulled away in a bit of shock and mumbled something about not really wanting to and his reply was "oh come on, I'm bored and I'm lonely" I was quite naïve at that age & hated saying no to people but even then I realised it wasn't the greatest compliment I'd ever had

blissfulllife · 13/02/2021 13:23

Ex friend who was 3 years younger than me "I could never wear a dress like that.....I'd look like mutton dressed as lamb at my age"

kerkyra · 13/02/2021 14:21

My ds last year " you have a face only a mother could love"😄

Ex bf " I bet you were pretty in your younger days,can I see your photos".
He was an ex soon after as he kept saying inappropriate things!

coronafiona · 13/02/2021 14:23

"You look nice! Have you put makeup on?'

Lampzade · 13/02/2021 14:41

I had been married for five years at the time. I showed a colleague a photo of my wedding and she said ‘You looked so beautiful on your wedding day. It’s a shame that you will never look that good again’

Farcry66 · 13/02/2021 14:43

I had a parents evening at school so I put makeup one before going down to the hall. The cleaner on our corridor stopped looked at me and then said 'it's amazing what makeup can do!' Cheers love!

KatherineJaneway · 13/02/2021 16:45

You were ugly as a child but you're alright now

Jjacobb · 13/02/2021 20:08

Some years ago now I was in the doctors surgery. As I left I walked past two older ladies, one said to the other "she looks like someone who cleans her skirting boards"

Again some years ago I was shopping with my then 4 year old granddaughter. A man commented, saying how cute my daughter was. I explained she was my granddaughter and he replied
"Fuck me, you must have started young"

timtam23 · 14/02/2021 10:20

I remembered another one.
"You look so much like my ex"
From a man who I had thought was lovely, we had been getting on so well until that point

Piggypiggyoinkoink · 14/02/2021 10:35

Random drunk at a train station mid afternoon decided to tell me he would love to ask me out because he liked plain women...

TheLittleRedToothbrush · 14/02/2021 12:09

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

poppyzbrite4 · 14/02/2021 19:12

@Jjacobb

Some years ago now I was in the doctors surgery. As I left I walked past two older ladies, one said to the other "she looks like someone who cleans her skirting boards"

she looks like someone who cleans her skirting boards

What does that mean? I can't work it out. Does it mean that you look as though you have a clean home? In that case, what does that look like? Is it a euphemism? You have a relaxed 'glow'.

Jjacobb · 14/02/2021 19:37

Poppy
I have no idea, I still sometimes ponder about what they meant. Maybe I look like someone with no real life so I must have oodles of time to clean.
Or maybe I look super organized and in control of all things domestic.
Skirting boards have never been high on my to do list but when I do give them a quick once over I always think of those ladies

poppyzbrite4 · 14/02/2021 19:42

@Jjacobb

Poppy I have no idea, I still sometimes ponder about what they meant. Maybe I look like someone with no real life so I must have oodles of time to clean. Or maybe I look super organized and in control of all things domestic. Skirting boards have never been high on my to do list but when I do give them a quick once over I always think of those ladies

I think it was a compliment. Someone who cleans their skirting boards takes care of the details. I'd say that you looked very well turned out and respectable. Perhaps a little no nonsense like a Ward Sister. I've been pondering it for days.

thefirstmrsrochester · 14/02/2021 19:48

Boyfriend in my teens telling me that women were either pretty or striking and that I was striking, whereas my friend Rebecca was pretty. He wasn’t being complementary, tried to backtrack and say he refuted conventional presumption of beauty etc. Hardly an oil painting himself btw, and he shagged my friend Rebecca behind my back.

Nyctophyllia · 14/02/2021 19:52

Friend at work after making her laugh " you'd be perfect if you had a cock "
I thought I was going to have be stretchered out laughing

WatermelonKisses · 14/02/2021 20:09

After losing quite a lot of weight my friend said "you look great, it's really only your belly you need to worry about now"

Deathraystare · 15/02/2021 07:47

“You’re beautiful... for a black girl.”

Seriously?? What a strange thing to say!

Bluntness100 · 15/02/2021 07:57

Man in his fifties, speaking to me in a professional capacity, ends the conversation with “from the neck up you could be a super model. Neck down it’s a bit of a mess”

I was a size ten 18 year old.

Deathraystare · 15/02/2021 08:04

@TripleHHH

Shit that was awful! And the biscuit comment, it is normally " I'll risk it for a biscuit," so really emphasising your skin colour by saying chocolate biscuit. Bloody hell!

Deathraystare · 15/02/2021 08:10

A colleague told me that I'm like SJP in The Family Stone

With the irritating throat clearing too???

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