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Original poster

Hidden phone

239 replies

wrigglewriggles · 02/02/2021 19:18

Possible reasons for my ex (who I unfortunately still have to live with) to be hiding a phone in my car?

OP posts:
RandomMess · 07/02/2021 13:32

Personally I would like into doing a stealth move out with the DC if possible and then establish contact arrangements etc.

He sounds very unstable and unpredictable.

Are there agencies there other than the police that you can discuss concerns with?

Ismellphantoms · 07/02/2021 14:09

I'd be checking the house for other devices (I read too many psychological thrillers).

Original poster
wrigglewriggles · 07/02/2021 14:36

@RandomMess

Personally I would like into doing a stealth move out with the DC if possible and then establish contact arrangements etc.

He sounds very unstable and unpredictable.

Are there agencies there other than the police that you can discuss concerns with?

Am going to speak to someone at work tomorrow who is the know with these things and can point me in the right direction.
OP posts:
RandomMess · 07/02/2021 14:56

Good Thanks

If you were in the UK I would be begging you to accept a refuge place.

Autumnchill · 07/02/2021 15:07

Stupid question but why are you allowing him to have your car keys? Can't you hide them somewhere so he doesn't have access or keep them with you at all times?

noideawhatusernametochoose · 07/02/2021 15:14

Drive it to the police station? And leave it there?

noideawhatusernametochoose · 07/02/2021 15:16

@noideawhatusernametochoose

Drive it to the police station? And leave it there?
.. and leave the phone there, I mean.
IsitSummeryet21 · 07/02/2021 15:24

If he's not on the car paperwork now. Take his key away.

Or put the phone in his car?

How is he charging it?

Thingywhatsit · 07/02/2021 15:36

Please take care of yourself and your kids, as per a pp I agree I would be looking at refuges too. Tracking is not ordinary sane behaviour - be careful not to speak on the phone in the house, and maybe get a second sim in case he has does something to your phone too.

Somethingkindaoooo · 07/02/2021 15:36

Op
Just leave the phone, but don't have any private conversations anywhere near it.

He'll think he's got the situation nailed down.

God, how exhausting

Original poster
wrigglewriggles · 07/02/2021 15:50

@Autumnchill

Stupid question but why are you allowing him to have your car keys? Can't you hide them somewhere so he doesn't have access or keep them with you at all times?
He doesn't have access to my keys but still has his own which you are right I need to get back but easier said than done. Some things I have to tread carefully with.
OP posts:
MrsMackesy · 07/02/2021 16:05

I haven't RTFT so apologies if this has been said before. Take care with your search history OP if he still has access to any devices you use. Even deleted search history can be found and quite easily if you know how. It does sound like he would do this if he is hiding a phone to track you and DC, unfortunately.

RandomMess · 07/02/2021 16:20

Could you "lose" or "misplace" yours and ask for his as you are rushing out to work?

Mumdiva99 · 07/02/2021 17:36

Sorry if I missed this suggestion but just give it back to him. Completely brazen. "I think you left this in the car by mistake". He'll know you know. What's he going to do? Put it back? And if he does....you have nothing to hide. So what if he tracks you.... (I don't mean it's ok....of course it isn't.....but while you are living together and sharing the kids I'm sure there aren't many secrets about where you go. As you said you are either at work or looking after them. Once you live separately of course I would deal with it.

2oldforthis · 07/02/2021 17:37

Drugs, cheating, work phone, tracking the car aka your movements.

Why don’t you .... ask him?

SycamoreGap · 07/02/2021 17:43

@2oldforthis

Drugs, cheating, work phone, tracking the car aka your movements.

Why don’t you .... ask him?

Maybe you could read the thread first?
Original poster
wrigglewriggles · 07/02/2021 17:55

My worry is that if I present the phone to him he'll find another way (less obvious) to track me.
I have nothing to hide but still don't like the idea of my every move in the car being tracked
Will hopefully speak to the police officer tomorrow and my friend at work before making any decisions about next steps.

OP posts:
MrsMackesy · 07/02/2021 18:03

I think you need to tread carefully OP, especially given past violence. Some suggestions have perhaps been made without reading all your pps on the thread.

ProfessionalWeirdo · 07/02/2021 18:19

OP, presumably you aren't supposed to know that the phone is in the car, so what would happen if you took it out? Is your ex likely to confront you about it - bearing in mind that this would force him to admit that he'd put it there?

Ismellphantoms · 07/02/2021 18:32

"Oh XDH I found a phone in the car that doesn't belong to either of us, so I've put a picture of it on our local FB page in the hope that someone knows whose it is/I've handed it in to the Police Station/I've given it to my neighbour because hers is broken etc."

Twisique · 07/02/2021 18:40

I would keep quiet about it and be glad I new one of his 'moves'. I would look for more. I would also tell the police officer everything in the hope that it will be helpful in the future.

MrsMackesy · 07/02/2021 18:55

One thing I would do discretely away from home is to take a photo of it where it is hidden and also close up. It might be useful evidence for you in the future. Also check your wifi hub manager at home - are the phone or any other unknown devices listed as using it now or in the past? What devices come up on your phone if you turn bluetooth on?

Original poster
wrigglewriggles · 07/02/2021 19:51

The phone he's hiding is his old phone. I recognise it. He got a new one a few weeks ago.

OP posts:
RandomMess · 07/02/2021 19:55

I'd love to drop it in a bucket of water, dry it out and put it back but no longer working...

Original poster
wrigglewriggles · 07/02/2021 19:59

I'd love to do many things to it. Have been so tempted to smash it, drop it in the bin, run over it with my car, throw it in the local pond.
Unfortunately, as I've already said I feel I have to be careful. If the phone goes who knows what he'll use next. Maybe nothing or maybe he'll get more technical.
Will bide my time and wait for advice before doing anything.

OP posts: